


Star Pieces

by MadelineL



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Allura cries a bunch but so would anyone in her position, Allura deserves better, Allura isn't an asshole and wouldn't murder an ally intentionally and certainly wouldn't leave them, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood, Character Turned Into a Ghost, Crying Allura, Crying Lotor, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fix-It, Keith and Lotor friendship, Lotor Deserves BETTER, Lotor isn't left in the rift, Love/Hate, Lovers to enemies to lovers, Political Alliances, Political Marriage, Seasons 6+ were garbage, Sexual Tension, Shiro being the boss leader we all know he is, Slow Burn, Voltron Coalition, but he got better, imagine thinking what happened to Lotor was good writing, klance friends, minor cutting, past ventor mention, pregnancy mention, rift sex, zonerva mention
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-09-10
Packaged: 2019-11-08 00:10:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 46,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17970722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadelineL/pseuds/MadelineL
Summary: It's barely been half a quintant since the fight with Lotor in Sincline where they left him dead, but a nightmare proves to Allura that he is already turning into a vengeful spirit. Refusing to leave him to that fate, she decides to restore him to both life and as her ally, no matter what it takes or what she has to agree to do.





	1. Nobody Left Behind

It was dimly lit where they were, and Allura’s senses were overwhelmed. He smelled of something with a spice. She couldn’t remember when she had taken her top off, but she could feel his claws lightly raking down her bare back. It made her arch forward against him. The feeling was giving her shivers. His breath on her neck and ear. She gripped at his shoulders, and could feel his bare thighs under hers as she sat facing him in his lap.

At some point he had begun kissing her. It started out sweet and soft and became more passionate, almost desperate. His tongue was quick, running along hers and sending a spark of pleasure through her body.

Pressing herself closer to him, she raked her fingers through his hair. One of his hands moved to grasp her from behind, and pushed her up. He broke the kiss, and ran his tongue along her jawline and down her neck as he pressed his hardness against her.

Angling her hips, she began to pull him inside. He moaned against her collarbone, scraping his teeth back up her neck. His hand pushed her down onto him fully. He thrust hard into her a few times before she continued with a soft rocking motion.

His breath tickled her ear, and she groaned as he ran his teeth across her neck again. She shivered once more, and he began to whisper against her skin.

“What did you say? Lotor I can’t understand.”

His grip on her back was increasing in strength, and she realized she couldn’t move anymore. Allura tried to push him back a bit, but he only pulled her flush against him. His claws began to dig into her skin as his words began to become clear.

“You… left me….”

She struggled. He bit into her neck, hard. Her skin felt hot where his mouth was, maybe wet. Suddenly his voice was loud and sharp, and all around them.

“You killed me, Allura. After everything we’d been through. Even after Oriande... you betrayed me, and you killed me with pure quintessence.”

“Please… stop, you’re hurting me.”

He laughed maliciously, and her veins went cold at the sound, but he let his grip lessen. Leaning back, she could finally see his face. Lotor’s mouth was parted slightly in a snarl, and she could see her blood on his teeth.

“Lotor…”

He sneered at her, his face becoming twisted with rage.

“You betrayed me, then you murdered me! You didn’t let me talk, Allura, instead you chose to listen to some little nobody.” He dug his claws of one hand in deeper, the pain searing. He grabbed her wrist with his other. “How does it feel not to be listened to, _Allura_?”

She struggled against him, hitting him and trying to pull his arms off her, but it didn’t work.

“My lover killed me and left my corpse to float alone for eternity! _How_ _ **should**_ _I feel,_ _ **Allura**_ _?_ ”

She couldn’t even see his face anymore through all the tears, and she started to scream.

 

...that screaming woke her up.

Allura pulled her knees up to herself and sobbed uncontrollably. She was positive it was really him. He just… knew too much. Was too angry. She hadn’t wanted to leave him, maybe she could have healed him, or he could have had a state funeral like his parents-

Allura jumped up. They absolutely could not leave him there. The thought of him becoming some sort of a lich like Zarkon was the final straw. The princess started to hastily get dressed into her flight suit, but stopped. Her neck hurt. And the skin on her back. Peeling the cloth back off, she moved to the mirror. Her breath caught in her throat as she saw the drying streaks of blood from puncture marks in her neck. She turned, and five very distinct angry lines and pinpricks were across her back, at the same angle and place he had grasped her.

She looked around the room wildly, but nothing seemed amiss. Nobody had been in there with her, she was as alone as when she first returned to her rooms. The thought that he was already becoming an angry spirit of some sort after a mere quintant made her heart seize.

With shaking hands, she put some antiseptic on the markings, having trouble seeing the wounds on her back to clean them through her tears. After she finished and dressed, she took a few fortifying breaths, and rushed out of her room. They had to retrieve him, and it had to be now.

 

–

 

Tapping her foot, the princess glared at Lance.

“While I understand your point, Lance, this is not your decision to make.”

He opened his mouth to speak again, and Keith put his hand on his shoulder before walking beyond him.

“Are you sure, Allura?”

“If you refuse to help me with Voltron, then I will go in alone with Blue.”

“I didn’t want to leave him either, so we’re with you, Princess. Pidge, is there anything you can do to lessen the effects on Voltron so we get a bit more time?”

The conversation went on as Allura zoned out. Her anxiety relaxed somewhat. Keith finally taking charge was refreshing and needed, she was a ball of anxiety already. That dream was just… too much. Lance’s grumbling wasn’t helping. She turned to look out at the stars.

_Soon, Lotor..._

 

–

 

<<Well this is where we came in.>>

“Thanks, Keith”

Allura took a deep breath and let it out, creating the wormhole. Voltron maneuvered inside.

<<According to my calculations, in the 10 vargas we’ve been gone, he would have moved approximately… well, just move in that general direction to the left. 11’clock. We’ll come across him eventually due to his trajectory.>>

<<Got it, thanks, Pidge.>>

They seemed to move forever. Allura began to lose hope, her anxiety spiked, and they were just flying continually without seeing him. She was trying not to cry when Keith interrupted her thoughts.

<<There he is.>>

Sincline was floating in the distance in front of them, slightly still moving, slightly spinning. It was an uncontrolled movement, giving it an unnatural appearance.

Flying closer, Voltron reached out and latched onto the other mecha, stabilizing it from its slow and constant turning. Hunk speaking brought her back to herself.

<<…Allura, are you sure you want to go alone?>>

“Yes. I’m going to see if I need to heal him there or not first. Communications might be bad, give me at least 20 dobashes to see what I can do. If it’s longer, please just tow us out. I’ll try and signal if I need more time.”

<<All right. Good luck, Princess.>>

Jettisoning herself outside, the pure quintessence hit her like a wave. It took a great deal of strength for her to try and channel the energy away. She stayed close to Voltron, moving up the edges until she was close to where Green still held onto the other ship.

Quickly unlatching the hatch to Sincline and entering the eerily silent and dark ship was a great relief. The structure itself at least provided some protection from the raw quintessence. Unfortunately, everything was still knocked offline. Allura floated to the outer door of the cockpit.

The inner hatch opened with a loud creak, angry she was doing it manually. Floating in, the familiarity of the space was upsetting. She removed her helmet, and dropped it towards the floor as she moved closer to the pilot’s seat.

Lotor’s hands still gripping the controls was the first thing she could see. It was as if he was still in the middle of the battle. Moving next to him, she looked down, trying not to cry. Lotor’s head was lolled back, mouth slightly ajar. He had a pained expression frozen in his brows. Her heart lurched at the sight. Allura was grateful his eyes were still pinched closed, she might have heaved if he had been staring back at her, lifeless and empty.

With a shaking hand, she reached out to move a stray lock of hair from the side of his face. Her vision blurred. Taking a few deep breaths to focus and not cry, Allura moved closer in the cramped space. She stood in front of him and looked down for a moment, trying to calm herself and focus on what she had to do. Putting a knee to either side of him on the seat, she kneeled over him as she ripped off her gloves, before grasping his cold face with both of her hands. Being in the rift made this far easier, it was one of the reasons she had insisted on trying to heal him before they left.

Terrified he had been haunting her but wouldn’t return to himself, she focused her whole being on him. She hoped if any piece had gone anywhere else, it would be called home... if it hadn’t just followed her already. A bright light encased them, and she fought to keep it from consuming her. If anything went wrong, there was nobody to bring _her_ back.

After what felt like an eternity, she felt his skin begin to warm, and heard him take a breath. His presence returned, and she could feel his unconscious thoughts like the murmur of a faraway brook on the wind. The princess let the connection fade. She had done it, she had brought him back from death itself!

Trying to blink away the tears, she looked down at him. His expression had softened. His mouth was still open, and he was breathing through it. Slowly his eyes opened. She could feel the tears streaking down her face again as their gazes locked.

“Welcome back, Emperor Lotor,” she said softly, her hands still on his face, gently rubbing her thumbs on his cheeks.

His expression darkened. A feeling of dread filled her, and she went to stand up and move away from him. It was then she realized how much the healing had taken a toll on her. Allura’s vision went black and sparkly as she began falling over. She felt him grab her wrist before she passed out completely.

 

–

 

Keith had yelled at Lance to shut his mouth for the second time right before he watched Sincline’s emergency power flicker on. There was a cracking on the communications line, and then Lotor’s voice.

<<Greetings, Voltron. I assume you’ve come to tow me out?>>

“Yes, and Allura?”

<<The healing was too much for her, she’s fine but unconscious.>>

Keith was instantly bristling. It almost sounded as if she were being held hostage.

“Acknowledged, Lotor. We’re just under a varga from where we came in, so sit tight until we get out. I hope you realize Allura wants to have a long talk with you when she wakes up.”

<<Yes, one we should have had already.>>

He couldn’t really fault the man for being pissed, he was right. He should have at least had the chance to admit he had been killing Alteans.

The trip back had taken nearly two vargas. Voltron ended up having to bring Sincline into the castle, the damage from the pure quintessence was too much to power anything on beyond a few of the onboard lights and life support systems, and even those were only half functioning.

Allura hadn’t woken up. Nearly everyone on the castle had rushed to the hangar or jumped from their lions, not knowing what to expect.

Lotor exited Sincline with no issues, as if he hadn’t spent the better part of the past day deceased, carrying the princess delicately in his arms. His expression was neutral as Lance attempted to yell at him to let her go. Hunk dragged his friend away, and Lotor handed her to Coran as Keith and Krolia told him to follow them.

 

–

 

Allura rolled over. She felt quite warm and didn’t want to get up. Starting to remember what had happened, she opened her eyes.

She looked around. This was certainly her bedroom. They must have come back to the ship with her still unconscious. She sighed, at least that meant Lotor hadn’t done anything to her.

_Lotor…_

She jumped out of bed and ran for the door.

Everywhere she went was empty. He wasn’t in the healing pods, or the recovery room. She finally just walked to the bridge. Coran was there alone, going over data.

“Ahh, Princess, you’re all rested up?”

“Yes, Coran where is Lotor?”

He frowned.

“Keith and Krolia took him down to the… containment cell. We were a little worried he would be… unruly. Possibly lapse back into… his rage.”

“Thank you,” she said dismissively and sighed as she left to go down to the worst place she could think of.

 

–

 

Keith was leaning against the wall next to the pathway. Krolia was nowhere to be seen. Allura looked at him, nodded, and continued across the bridge.

Lotor was half laying down on the cot in the cell, one foot on the floor, the other flat on the bedding with him. His armor was in a jumble on the floor, leaving him in only his simple undersuit and boots. One of his hands was stretched out above him, and he was slowly curling his fingers in and out. Allura realized she had never truly seen him without his gloves on until now, even when in Sincline they had...

She was watching him for a solid dobosh before he acknowledged her. Without turning his head, he spoke, still clenching and unclenching his hand.

“I assume you are recovered, Princess.”

“Yes. As are you?”

“I suppose the proper thing is to thank you, but I’m not sure if it’s warranted given how I arrived there in the first place.”

Lotor’s speech lacked all the softness he had always had with her before. His voice was sharp, and his words were painful. It sounded just like when he spoke to his soldiers… and he was absolutely right.

She sighed, and unlocked the door. Before he could move, she stepped inside, leaving the door wide open.

“I don’t intend to hold you prisoner, Coran just wanted to make sure you wouldn’t.. relapse.”

He sat up and moved away from her. His gaze never left her, but he didn’t respond. She looked at the floor and held her hands to steady herself.

“Lotor… I’m… sorry. We should have spoken to you before-”

“Before you murdered me?”

She could feel her lip quiver. She bit it to try and stabilize it, but her eyes were already filling with tears.

“Yes,” she said softly. This had all been her first test as a leader, with another important diplomatic leader, and no clear cut solution, and she had completely blown it by responding with violence. He had tried to talk to her, multiple times.

She could feel the tears now streaming down her cheeks.

“I apologize for not letting you speak, even though you repeatedly attempted to do just that. I-I apologize for… attacking you, my supposed ally. I am a poor leader and I deserve all your scorn. We still don’t even know what this Altean colony even was, Romelle admits to not even knowing all of the details. And I didn’t let you explain yourself, even after everything we’ve been through....”

He didn’t answer at first. She tried to rub the tears off her face and out of her eyes, but she was already having a difficult time not breaking down into sobs.

“Perhaps we should talk later when we’ve both had more time to process the situation, Princess.”

His voice had been softer, making her resolve break as she did sob. Here she was blubbering at him, ruining her apology for harming him, and he was still managing to be a… perfectly diplomatic prince.

Nodding quickly, Allura moved to leave the cell. When he didn’t move, she turned back to him.

“You’ll be given your old rooms again. It would be unacceptable to keep an emperor here, especially if we are to continue any diplomatic… relations.”

She swallowed in nervousness as she watched his eyes ever so slightly open wider. Perhaps they could trust one another again if they both gave in a bit.

“Thank you, Princess Allura.”

Lotor stood and replaced his vambraces. He gathered the rest of his things, picking them up in a pile to carry, following Allura out of the cell and across the bridge. It was a tense situation, and she tried to walk as regally as possible.

Keith looked alarmed. He went to speak but she interrupted him.

“Please escort the Emperor to his normal rooms, Keith.”

He blinked at her.

“Y-yeah, sure, Allura.”

When they didn’t follow her towards the elevator, she looked back and Lotor spoke.

“Please don’t wait on me, Princess. I’m sure you wish to be alone on your return up.”

His words just kept cutting into her.

“Thank you. I would like to speak to you in a varga, if you wouldn’t mind.”

He nodded. She gave a weak smile back, and turned to return to her rooms.

 

–

 

Allura had cried when she entered, barely making it inside. She let out everything she had been holding in. The entire situation was terrible, there was no way around it. Him being calm about things certainly helped, but that dream had set her on edge in every imaginable way. It reminded her of when they had gone to collect the quintessence alone, and he had… She shook her head to clear it and went to wash her face.

She changed into a gown, and waited for Lotor. She had a small tea set, something her mother had told her was invaluable to diplomacy as a princess, and she had taken it out and set about making fresh tea. She barely had any leaves, but it seemed worth the effort for this situation.

The small chirping at her door let her know he had arrived. She took a breath before standing and opening it for him. He lightly bowed to her, with his hand on his chest like she had seen a few times before. She moved aside so he could enter.

She smiled a bit as she looked up at him. He’d refreshed himself, even his hair was damp. She wondered if he knew how to use the ion dryers or if he liked it that way. Extending her arm, she indicated for him to sit. He didn’t hesitate.

“Thank you for coming to speak with me. I’ve prepared tea for us, I hope that’s okay.”

Lotor gave her the first smile she had seen in what felt like deca-phoebs.

“Yes, thank you.”

Allura picked up the elegant tea pot and filled the small cup on the table in front of him.

Lifting it to his lips, he took a long sip. Him being so calm about all this was a bit unnerving. She had _killed him._

“Do… do you remember… I had a dream, and I believe you have been a ghost in the past quintant.”

He set the cup down.

“I’m afraid I don’t understand your meaning, Princess.”

She bit her lip in nervousness, before unfastening the top of her gown under her chin. Pulling it off her neck a ways, she slid the edge of the bandage off and looked away so he could see better.

“I had a dream you were… touching me. And you bit me, and dug your nails into my back. I woke with both wounds, as if you had been in my bed with me, doing that to me and not… stuck in Sincline.”

Allura glanced back at him as she refastened the top of her gown. His eyes were wide and he was looking at one of his hands.

“Seeing... your wound, I have what feels like a vague memory of that. I apologize for harming you in this barbaric manner.”

Despite herself and the situation, she laughed.

“I don’t think you can reasonably apologize for haunting me, Lotor. It was quite deserved, and to be honest it spurred me to go get you.” She took in a deep breath and let it back out. “After the fight, I wanted to immediately grab Sincline. Keith was about to when you kept moving farther away, and Voltron just couldn’t take any more… If we had stayed to bring you out too, I believe none of us would be here, now.”

She watched as he started to lace his fingers together, repeatedly. After a moment, he sighed, and reached to pick up the cup again and took another sip. He glanced up at her, and she smiled softly in return.

“I… had hoped you would tell me about the colony.”

Lotor frowned and swirled the tea still in the cup before setting it back down.

“I’m afraid, Princess, you are going to be upset by what I have to say, and not in the way that the Altean girl will have you believe.”

She frowned, and waited patiently for him to continue speaking.

“I gathered the Alteans I found scattered, into one place. A safe haven, far from the Galra Empire. But that would have only lasted for so long. I knew no matter what, they needed a way to protect themselves. We both know how powerful Altean quintessence is, Allura. I was developing a way that a single Altean could power and pilot a ship. They could protect themselves. Eventually, I had hoped to use their strength to overthrow my father and set the entire universe free of his tyranny.”

Allura’s body felt numb. He couldn’t possibly be telling the truth.

“Each time an Altean was at an appropriate amount of quintessence ability, they were brought to an orientation and requested to join the program. I never had any refuse.” He paused, and refilled his tea cup himself. After taking another sip, he continued. “A few, had complications. That girl? Romelle? Her brother had complications. He was too young, we should have waited to take him up. He ended up crashing his ship back onto the main colony. Unfortunately, he did not survive, and I regret not waiting until he was older. He had insisted on protecting his sister. All the others on the main colony were none the wiser of what was really happening. I felt it would keep them farther from the war if they did not know the truth. It was a foolish notion, in retrospect, but keeping my mother’s people free from war was a dream to me.”

He was looking back down into the tea again. Allura could stop her tears. They could figure out if he was telling the truth or not, she had no doubt he would have some proof, probably schematics of the Altean ships, perhaps photos. It would be too elaborate of a hoax for no real gains, he had to be telling the truth.

Allura covered her face with her hands as she began to sob. He didn’t say anything to her as she let out her emotions, and she managed to hold her tongue from wailing outright.

It was a few dobashes before she calmed down enough that the embarrassment of crying like that in front of him hit her hard. She was quite sure her nose was a mess. Her mind kept going back to the information he had told her. Lotor had gone to great lengths to protect her people, _their people_ , and she had done terrible things to him in response. It was almost too much.

She heard him stand, and walk somewhere, and return quickly.

“I believe your paladins called this a towel.”

She peaked between her fingers and saw him holding the cloth outstretched. She murmured a thanks as she took it and covered her face. When she felt brave, she slowly lowered it.

“I apologize for withholding this information from you, Princess. It was one of many things I have ongoing that require the utmost secrecy, even from my closest allies. I had planned on telling you when… when….”

Allura glanced up at him. He looked like he was having trouble breathing. She stayed quiet, feeling as though if she spoke, he would lose his courage altogether. He sighed and closed his eyes, his voice almost a whisper.

“I had planned on telling you when I asked you to be my empress.”

Tears streaked down her cheeks again as she stared at him.


	2. A Long Overdue Discussion

Allura closed her eyes, trying to will herself to be calm.

“ _I had planned on telling you when I asked you to be my empress.”_

This was more than she could handle. The last two quintants had been far, far too much to deal with. He was all but declaring his love for her… or that he had. She doubted he could possibly feel anything for her, now.

“I… see.”

“Princess, given the amount of shared information, and… the Blade of Marmora, we will both benefit heavily from continuing this alliance. The Blades are invaluable to what I need to do as emperor. However, you’ll excuse me if I don’t fully trust anyone involved directly with Voltron after this.”

Her heart sank. She knew he wouldn’t, but to hear him say it so bluntly….

“Of course.” Her eyes were still prickling with tears as she stared at the taut towel between her clenched fingers in her lap. “I understand completely. I am asking a lot of you to just be here, sitting calmly with me after the harm I personally inflicted on you.”

She dared to glance up at him. Lotor’s expression was completely unguarded, and nothing but pure sadness. The uptick of his eyebrows gave her a physical pain in her heart. Their gazes locked, and she watched as his eyes began to tear up. It made her comprehend for the first time what she had destroyed within him with her betrayal, piercing him right into his very soul.

Allura couldn’t control her reaction. She had decimated one of the most important relationships she’d made in her life. Lotor wasn’t just anyone. He was the last remaining link to the goodness of Daibazaal, the physical proof of the untainted love of his parents from before the problems of the rift had truly started, and she had quite literally murdered him... not even a varga after they had been kissing in the hangar, and before that in Sincline they had.... She bit her lip as she felt fresh tears flow down her cheeks once more, but she refused to take her eyes from his.

Lotor was the one to break first. He turned away from her, and brought a hand up to wipe near his eyes. After a moment he spoke again, his voice cracking and slightly shaky.

“I can’t trust the Voltron paladins, and I can’t trust you, either, but the entire situation brings to the foreground how unstable the alliance has been from the beginning. I took the throne with help from your Black Paladin, it would be difficult to manage without some… connection with your faction still. Something stable that cannot be easily broken.”

She watch him take a deep breath and close his eyes. When he opened them again, his expression was serious but softer, almost tender. He startled her by sliding forward and off his chair to kneel in front of her. He reached out slowly, and she let go of the towel as his fingers wrapped around hers. Holding onto her hands, he looked up at her.

“Princess Allura, you are the heart of Voltron, and the soul of the Coalition. Wherever you go, Altea itself goes. I realize things are not as… ideal as either of us would have formerly wished for, but if you are willing, I would like to ask you to stand with me as my empress and work with me to bring peace to the galaxies. Will you agree to a permanent alliance? One forged through marriage?”

She blinked at him. He had just cried over their lost future together and her utter betrayal, but he was _now_ _asking her_ to marry him?

“You… want me to be your wife?”

He had a sad smile on his face. “Yes, that is how a marriage alliance works.”

Allura’s eyes went wide and she looked away from him to stare into her lap. After she had…!

“I… I don’t know how to answer that. Are you opposed to my thinking it over?”

“If that is what you wish. Is a movement sufficient?”

She wasn’t sure a whole lifetime would be sufficient!

“I, uh, yes, a movement would… be lovely, please.”

She dared to glance back up at him. He still wore the sad smile, but he kissed her fingers before he let go of her hands. He stood, and lowered himself back down in the chair opposite her.

“After we are finished, I will take a brief rest before returning to my capital ship. Then we’ll meet up in a movement. I won’t hold your answer against you, Allura, even if you choose not to… accept me. It is not a solution to be taken lightly, and I understand if you decide against it.”

He paused again and took a deep breath.

“If we don’t change our situation soon, I believe resentment from all will settle in its place, and then it will be harder to move forward with changes. Should you determine to not be my empress, we will need to make other arrangements for the alliance. A misunderstanding like this cannot happen again, it puts the stability of the entire universe at risk.”

The intention of his words was clear; with him gone, a power vacuum would have destabilized the Galran Empire, and it would have created chaos for all involved. A figure head was needed. He was truly an amazing diplomat if he was able to sit here with her and speak to her about this so calmly. It was a testament on how he had managed to survive Zarkon’s potential and very real wrath for so long.

Lotor emptied his tea cup, and sat staring into it even after he placed it back on the table. There was silence as Allura’s mind raced.

“Lotor… I can’t help but wonder, would it not be better for you to take a… Galran empress? Any children we have would be... mostly Altean...”

The implications of what she said hit her as she snapped her traitorous mouth shut. If it was a political marriage, they wouldn’t necessarily have children. And maybe the Galra didn’t care about if a child was born in wedlock or not if he declared them his heir. She was advertising it would be okay to touch her again, that if they married, she would be _willing_ to bear his heirs.

Flashes of what they had done when they had collected quintessence together filled her mind... _her flight suit pulled below her knees_ _with_ _his hand between her legs._ _Her fingers_ _running under the small opening in_ _the front of_ _his_ _armor_ _,_ _sliding_ _down below his waist._ _Her other hand_ _pulling his head back_ _roughly_ _by his hair so she could run her tongue alo_ _ng_ _his exposed throat_ _as she moaned when he_ _..._

Allura could feel her cheeks grow warm, and he interrupted her thoughts.

“In a normal circumstance, you would be correct, but this situation is a bit… different. Formally joining ourselves, as the figureheads of our factions, would end all conflict in a finality that would be hard to otherwise achieve. I have already shown my strength to my people through the use of Black Lion, my father’s Lion. I am not sure how you will feel about this, Princess, and at the risk of increasing any ire you might still have, I still wish to be perfectly honest with you; if you marry me, it would be viewed as my… dominating you, and by that extension, Voltron itself.”

She bit her lip. His reasoning was impeccable. The way he went about political intrigue made her feel like a child playing with dolls. The prince had been around for absolutely everything while she had been in stasis. It made her wonder why he even wanted her by his side. Would he make her merely a pretty ornament except when he needed something from the coalition? It would be logical, after what had happened. He’d even said he couldn’t trust her… she tried to swallow her pride.

“Your argument is very sound, I will… take this into consideration.” she paused, thinking more on what he had said. “I… suppose that for me to be accepted as your empress, a certain amount of… giving in would be required to appease a… culture used to battling for control.”

He frowned a little.

“I would not treat you as a trophy, Allura. When you’ve come to understand your role fully to the Galra, then we can advance from there. There hasn’t been an empress since my mother, and her existence has been all but forgotten to everyone but myself. You can even mold the position to be what you want, or avoid doing much at all after the empire settles and Sendak’s factions are dismantled.”

Lotor was dancing around reminding her he wouldn’t trust her with anything beyond being a figurehead. She didn’t dare consider he was possibly hiding that he wanted to someday trust her once more, and that he just wouldn’t voice that. He had to still be so angry at her, and giving herself any small hopes might crush her spirit altogether if it never came to pass. Her stomach was rolling with anxiety over all of this.

Allura finally seemed to remember she had her own tea cup. With shaking hands, she brought it to her lips and sipped it. It was growing cold. The princess began considering if it was a good representation of his feelings for her. She supposed it wouldn’t matter too much, even if she agreed to marry him.

“What of the Coalition? And… the Alteans in the colony?”

A small smirk appeared on his face. He looked a bit… pleased. Was she being tested?

“A better small council is most logical for the alliance. We’ve been handling things far too lackadaisical for my tastes, and I take full responsibility for not pushing for more organization from everyone. As for the Alteans… I’ve largely let them live as they please. That won’t alter. I have no doubts they will be enthused to learn of your presence, but whether they choose to continue as they have or not is for them to decide. Once things have settled with the empire, I plan to give them the freedom to leave as they see fit. It’s too risky for that at the current point, I’m afraid.”

“Oh, I see. I suppose that I have much to think on.”

“Thank you, Princess. We’ve always worked well when we’re alone, I have no doubt any personal alliances we have moving forward will, at the very least, be based on open communication when we are together.”

She bit the inside of her cheeks. She didn’t think the remorse and regret she felt could grow deeper, but it did. His words cut her worse than if he had bit and clawed at her again, and she wasn’t sure he had realized it would do that. She tried to sputter out a reply.

“Y-yes, absolutely. No matter my decision in regards to… a marriage, I will be speaking clearly and openly to you about all important matters that involve you or the Galra… and the Alteans.”

Glancing up at him, he had a small smile on his lips. When they locked eyes, it faded as his expression turned more somber.

“Thank you for the tea, Princess. I’ll leave all relevant information on the Altean Resistance Project with Coran. I do not plan on socializing with your paladins or their guests before I depart.”

She nodded. “I understand.”

“If there are any other concerns that need to be addressed, do not hesitate to notify me. We’ve all had a trying movement, and I am sure something might pop up.”

As he stood to leave, she followed. Allura unconsciously grabbed his arm. She knew she was looking up at him with a very sorrowful expression, but his bold move in asking her to still be his empress had made her feel slightly relieved and perhaps even… a bit happy.

“Thank you, Lotor, and… I am truly, so very sorry about… everything. Your willingness to even put me into a position such as this is… nothing short of… exceptional. Perhaps I can feel I am worthy of such a chosen... resolution in the future.”

His expression softened. Allura realized she was indicating she was leaning towards agreeing to be his wife.

He closed his eyes for a moment and she watched as he took a breath before looking at her once more.

“If we did not already have a coalition and alliance to be concerned with, I would have departed immediately. I am concerned for the stability of my realm and keeping the war from happening again, Allura. I need you to understand I do not trust you and do not foresee that altering much.”

Eyes wide, she looked to the floor as she slowly and shakily took her hand off his arm.

“I understand, thank you for clarifying. As… as a princess I have always been well aware my marriage would most likely not be for one of love, but of a political alliance. If we do make this choice, I hope we can at least grow to have mutual respect, someday….”

His hand touching her shoulder startled her, and she looked up. He gave her a soft smile and a nod.

“Thank you, Princess.”

She returned his smile with a sad one of her own, and tried to fight back her tears.

“Please, have a safe journey.”

“Thank you.”

Lotor turned, and left her room. Allura thought she saw Keith on the other side of the door, but her vision blurred as she began to cry and she turned to fling herself onto her bed in a fit of sobs.

 

–

 

The door to Allura’s rooms opening startled Keith. He had been waiting for that… or yelling… or anything really. The calm way Lotor exited, and the terrible look on Allura’s face, told him that their conversation must have been as difficult as expected. What Keith didn’t expect was seeing Lotor blinking away tears.

“Lotor, I, uh, wanted to talk to you for a min- a dobosh, if you can?”

He gave him a look like he might rip his head off.

“I suppose,” Lotor said as he started to walk towards his rooms. Keith had to nearly run to keep up with his long strides.

“Oo… kay, well, I just wanted to tell you that… it wasn’t exactly personal, what happened.”

Lotor stopped and turned to stare at him. The emperor’s arms were folded behind his back, so it was an imposing stance.

“ _Not personal_?”

Keith sighed. “Okay, it was personal, but everything was happening so fast, and with Shiro not being Shiro… well, everyone was reacting before they could think.” Keith’s body felt like lead. Shiro had always told him to make sure to make amends as fast as possible with someone, and Lotor was too important to put off like he usually would. “We all fucked up and I’m sorry. We didn’t want to fight you really, or leave you, but the quintessence didn’t give us too much of a choice.”

Lotor frowned and looked away. “Yes, Allura mentioned something about that.”

Keith tried not to shuffle his feet like a child. After a moment of silence, Lotor began to walk, but at a slower pace this time. Perhaps he did want to talk now.

“I know Kolivan trusts you, and Allura… wants to. I’m in the position of being… both the leader of Voltron, and a Blade, and… Galran.”

Lotor stopped and turned to look at him, eyes wide.

“What did you say?”

“I…,” Keith unconsciously touched the marking on his cheek. “Krolia is my mother. She’s a Blade, and she was undercover for a long time, trying to keep the Lions from Zarkon. I didn’t even know any of this until very recently.”

He wasn’t looking anywhere in particular, so when Lotor grabbed his chin, he nearly jumped. Keith didn’t fight him when his head was tilted and Lotor moved in close to look at him.

“Interesting...”

Lotor let him go and stood back up, still watching him. Keith blinked a few times before he looked away, flustered.

“I… maybe you have some insight into being… not a ful- I mean….” he looked back at Lotor. The emperor had narrowed his eyes.

“Perhaps. Allura and I will be speaking again in one movement. Your involvement in the Blades of Marmora needs to be discussed-” Keith’s eyes went wide. “-as well as information gathering tactics if you missed so much of my research while in the base at the colony. I’m rather disappointed in the chaos this created.”

Keith’s mouth went dry. If Allura had been upset after talking to him, that means Lotor was right, he had missed something. Something important. He went to agree, and all his training on how to address his superior flew out the window, leaving him nearly sputtering to respond.

“Is that all you needed to speak with me about?” Lotor asked, half turned back to walk away.

“Y-yes, I suppose I’ll be the one to see you off when you leave.”

“If you would please, I’ll notify you when I am to depart.”

Keith nodded and watched as Lotor continued down the hall before entering his rooms.

 

–

 

The princess was exhausted, but she had decided to indulge in a long, hot bath. It wasn’t something she did often, as it took up so much time but since they had no immediate concerns... After washing her hair, she pinned it back up and lowered herself into the hot water. She was instantly relaxing from all the turmoil of the battles.

_I wish I had something this easy to relax my mind…_

Allura kept thinking about what Lotor had said. His _empress_. To rule the people who had killed her people… she blinked several times.

 _That_ _i_ _sn’t right. The only ones left would be… probably only Sendak. Lotor certainly wasn’t involved, and all the soldiers we’ve met certainly aren’t older than him..._

She tried to remember what she could about Daibazaal. Even before being in stasis, she hadn’t been there much before it had been destroyed, and she had been so young. During that time, many Galra had been on Altea, too. She tried but couldn’t remember what had happened to them. Did her father send them away? Have they been fighting the ancestors of the children of Daibazaal that Altea had saved this entire time? Allura didn’t think she could feel worse, but her heart kept clenching.

They were going to need to have a long talk about their shared history. If Zarkon had been a demonic lich Lotor’s entire life, then he probably didn’t know even half of what she did. She tried not to cry, thinking about how Lotor had never met his true father, but she had. And his mother…

The princess thought about how he had never mentioned what had happened to Honerva. Allura could remember her. She had smiled often, was aloof but kind, and she distinctly remembered the way her hair swooped… Allura laughed. Lotor had his mother’s hair nearly completely, though with that front bit singled out, the rest pushed back constantly. Perhaps this should be something to save to regale him with. A fond memory to share when they needed to strengthen their bond.

Her eyes went wide at the realization she was already assuming they would marry. She let herself slide farther under the water, nearly to her nose. Her mood also sunk when she realized she had momentarily forgotten what had happened.

Allura tried to focus on the marriage proposal itself. Did he really want this or was it just a tool at his disposal.

“ _...you are the heart of Voltron, and the soul of the Coalition. Wherever you go, Altea itself goes...”_

It sounded practiced. And terribly romantic. Her face felt hot. Lotor had been already planning to ask her to marry him before they had finished Sincline. She wondered when he had made the choice at all. Did his plans hinge on her being with him, is that the only reason he had still asked? Had he wanted her out of love before, but now she destroyed that and he was just after the political gains?

Her tears dripping into the bathwater startled her. She looked down, blinking, trying to clear her vision.

“...W _herever you go, Altea itself goes...”_

She must have come across as a dream to him. A full Altean, the last princess, someone who knew their home world, _and_ his mother, and had passed the trials at Oriande where he had himself failed. She would have been shocked if someone like him hadn’t been half in love with her already.

It all made her doubt herself. Did he even care about her as a person? She instantly dismissed the notion. Lotor had always been supportive of her, encouraging her, speaking to her as an equal, wanting her opinion on many things.

Her thoughts wandered towards their time alone in the rift. Lotor had been so nervous when he had asked her to take her helmet off. She could have sworn his lip trembled as he leaned in to kiss her, the touch light and chaste. When her hand grabbed at his hair at the base of his neck, he’d made such a guttural groan she felt it between her legs.

She could see the smile he had on his face when they were working on building the Sincline ships. It had been genuine, it had been enthusiastic, and it had been happy. She had made him happy before their battle. He’d had that same smile on his lips when her legs were wrapped around his waist as he took her against the console in the ship. His heart had to be in turmoil now, maybe shattered to pieces.

Allura sighed.

_Shattered._

She gasped. With the war going on for nearly all of her life, she had all but forgotten that tradition. Jumping out of the tub and wrapping herself in a towel, she ran back into her bedroom. Throwing open her jewelry case, she unlatched it all the way to the bottom level. There, alone on a bed of bright blue velvet, sat a large eight pointed star shaped gemstone. On the flat center was another small eight pointed silver star to match the outside. The silver star had a pin through to the back where a small silver disk snugly held it all in place. A Claelur. Her Marriage Star.

Allura’s lips quivered as she picked it up. It was heavy. The inner facets glinted off the light, making it sparkle and throw reflections around the room like a manifestation of a star from outside the ship.

A claelur was given to a girl on her tenth nameday. For the spacefaring race, it was a symbol of her reaching the first step towards their majority. When she reached her full majority at twenty, it was to be used as her betrothal gift if she eventually was engaged. Tradition going back generations stated that when the young woman accepted a suitor, she would take the silver pin out of the center and gift that, and the disk, to their beloved. Without those, the crystal would then fall apart into shards like a puzzle, no two claelur being the same. Each time her suitor pleased her, she would gift them a piece. Shard by shard, the star would be reassembled by her betrothed. Once complete, the couple could wed, as the star gemstone was then given back to the bride as the center of her bridal gown. Without all the shards, the star won’t stay together, and without the star, the gown wouldn’t stay together.

Allura sniffed as she tried to stop crying. If her father only knew she was considering giving it to the son of his best friend…


	3. Decisions

Allura slept for at least a quintant and a half. She half expected some other situation to come up to interrupt her, as always seemed to happen. Maybe something purely ridiculous like holes in space after fighting with Lotor in Sincline from him jumping between realities... but she laughed that off as the completely absurd idea it was when she was falling asleep, and it never came to pass. Lotor would never make such blatant miscalculations with his ships.

Laying in her bed, she knew that she shouldn’t all things considered, but she let herself feel some happiness at the fact he had been planning on asking her to marry him. She snuggled up in her blanket, the claelur on the pillow beside her. Running her finger along the edges of the crystal, she let her mind wander back to her time alone with Lotor when working on the ships...

“ _Princess, I could use help holding this piece up, if you wouldn’t mind?”_

_Allura put her hands near his on the hull. Lotor didn’t step away. Instead, he moved his hands to cover hers, and slowly slid them up her arms._

“ _Thank you,” he whispered in her ear as he continued up her shoulders, and then slowly down her sides, stopping at her waist. “Your help is invaluable to this project, Allura.” He had purred out her name, and her stomach fluttered._

_She closed her eyes and let out the small breath she’d been holding in. His hands continued down, and he gripped her hips for a brief moment before he let her go entirely. Allura was grateful for the silence after, because she would not have been able to process anything he said to her for at least a full dobosh._

Tears leaked out of her eyes and onto her pillow. She’d been so foolish. Lotor had been nothing but genuine with her, even if he had kept some stuff to himself. Given her reaction, he had been justified in hiding the colony and the Alteans from her. It made her question her ability at being a leader at all.

Covering her face with her hands, Allura wept until exhaustion took over. When she woke again, she had to talk to Coran. This was too big of a decision with too much of a sordid history.

 

–

 

The star crystal was on the table between them. Allura had her hands pressed between her knees as she shrunk into her self. Coran wouldn’t stop looking at her with his head tilted.

“Please, explain this once more, Princess. You apologized to him, you were both upset, he told you he couldn’t trust you again, and then he… asked you to be the empress to his empire?”

“...yes.”

“He’s as mad as a wet chüper!”

“Coran!”

“Well he is! Though I can’t fault his logic one bit. I suppose since he’s lived so long he thinks he can manage you,” he said as he stroked his mustache.

Allura leaned her forehead on the table as she closed her eyes. This was not helping.

“Ahh, so despondent you won’t even argue that, huh?”

She made a whiny groaning noise at him.

There was a few doboshes of silence. Allura wanted him to give her some wisdom, maybe even just tell her what to do, but he never would at this rate. At the worst time!

When the princess considered just leaving the room, Keith’s voice at the door made her look up.

“What’s that sparkly thing?”

“It’s Allura’s claelur! It’s what a woman gives to her betrothed as part of their engagement, but I’m not sure how well it’s going to fit this situation….”

“This situation? With Lotor?” Keith asked as he stepped closer and peered down at the crystal.

Allura looked into her lap as she nodded.

“I don’t understand. He was crying when he left your room the other day.”

Her heart lurched and she could feel her eyes prickling again.

“Ahhhh, no, please, I didn’t mean to make it worse it’s just...” Keith sighed.

Coran hummed. “Princess, if he was so moved as that, perhaps not all is lost.” Her head snapped up to look at him, eyes wide. “If he didn’t think it were worth having you by his side, I doubt he would make such a bold move. He is not to be taken lightly, nor his decisions, no matter how worfblorzing it comes off. He might… _imply_ he can’t trust you, but would he tie himself to you permanently if he didn’t at least want to?”

“Coran, I _killed him_ , on purpose. How could he ever trust me after that?”

“Well you didn’t leave him killed, now did you.” She frowned hard at him as he tried to turn his expression serious. “Now now, don’t look at me like that. Young love… well… I’m not sure if he counts as young, but a fresh, new love can do many things to a man, maybe even forgiving his sweetheart if she just so happened to _choose_ to murder him now and again. “

“CORAN!”

“Princess, it’s not as uncommon as you think. Surely you remember the story of Queen Bolinaquin of Mundintra?” Allura frowned hard, and Coran turned to Keith as he continued the story. “Before Altea had been united as one planet, Bolinaquin was a powerful queen who refused to let her husband be her equal. It’s said that whenever he would fail to please her in bed, or even wake her up a little too early, she would stab him through the heart with the center sword that made up her fearsome towering crown. She usually left him dead for at least a week before she gathered her top alchemists and brought him back to life, just to repeat it all the next week. It became as regular as the mating cycle of the pruglunt bird, but I’m sure thankfully only half as noisy.”

“THAT is a children’s tale.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that, Princess. Your mother had the crown and I do believe it’s somewhere in storage. She threatened your father with it on multiple occasions, including a state dinner with foreign dignitaries!”

“She did not!”

Coran laughed and rubbed his chin. “I believe she was pregnant with you when that happened, Princess.”

Allura finally let herself laugh a little, and Coran smiled at her. She sighed as she closed her eyes, slightly calmer.

“Well, I will not be murdering Lotor, _again,_ for any reason. It’s rather unacceptable that I did the first time...” she trailed off into a whisper.

“Allura,” Keith said hesitantly, “I’m not… very good at this sort of thing, but I think Coran has the right idea. When Lotor left, he was a bit standoffish, but he wasn’t so angry seeming anymore. He didn’t even take the Sincline ships. Would he have stayed to talk to you if he had given up completely?”

Keith was right. And so was Coran. Doubts still lingered.

“He told me he couldn’t trust me, I don’t think he was lying.”

From the doorway, another voice filled the silence.

“He’s guarding his heart.”

It was Shiro, wearing baggy clothes not his own, the sleeve of his missing right arm hanging loose.

“Shiro!”

“Thank King Groggery the Infirm you’re awake!”

Allura smiled. “How do you feel, is… is your body adjusting?”

He had a light smile on his face. “I hope I’m not interrupting. You can all calm down, I was just resting again. Yes, I feel… strange but okay. Having two completely different sets of memories from two different lives that split and are re-merging is nothing they ever prepared me for in the possibilities of space travel.”

“If there’s anything more I can do….”

“Please, Princes, it’s fine,” he said as he raised his remaining hand. “I’m okay for now, I just need to get used to… merging my entire consciousness.” He paused, looking down at the sparkling gem. “It seems you’re having a serious discussion.”

Allura looked back at the claelur. It was beautiful, and clear, and made her heart hurt.

Coran brought Shiro up to speed, filling in the details so both he and Keith wouldn’t be so in the dark.

“Allura,” Shiro started, “when I took him to the Kral Zera, we spoke at great length and he… well, to be honest I think you will be okay if you keep your head up and move forward. Emperor Lotor is not one to back down when a situation is difficult, especially if it means he eventually gets what he’s worked for. He finds a way, even if it doesn’t always appear like it.”

Shiro paused and took a deep breath, looking down at her with a soft expression.

“He was willing to give you a chance even after everyone wanted to just hand him over to Zarkon. That speaks highly of his character and how he feels about you. Keith is right, if he stayed and spoke after your battle, then he hasn’t completely given up on you yet. Certainly not if he proposed. If you stay calm, focused, and always make sure you think everything through, things will work out. Be open and honest with him, Princess.”

Allura was crying again. She folded her arms on the table and pushed her face into them.

Someone said her name softly, she didn’t know who, but she ignored them. A hand was on her shoulder, and for a brief moment her heart wished it was Lotor, but it wasn’t.

“It will be fine, Princess,” she heard Shiro whisper next to her.

 

–

 

The castle stayed where it had been, right near the remnants of Daibazaal. Allura felt… obligated in some way, to not go anywhere. If she was going to accept him as she planned, she felt it was only right to do it there, in the shadow of their past.

It had been nearly the whole movement until Lotor’s return. There had been some news with the Blades to pass on, something to do with Sendak, but Allura didn’t involve herself. All she knew was that Keith had taken it upon himself to be the one to contact Lotor about it directly… and update him about Shiro not being connected to Haggar any longer.

Her anxiety spiked as she looked out of the large window into space at the stars, and spotted a small fleet of ships that appeared, signaling Lotor had returned slightly early. Or maybe she just didn’t know he intended to. Or forgot when someone told her. She’d been rather preoccupied with her own thoughts.

The ships also meant he would be taking Sincline as he had intended. She knew that they wouldn’t be keeping it in the castle, but something existing that was clearly more powerful than Voltron made her nervous. Allura had to remind herself that if she married him, they would both be technically hers. _Theirs_. They would have to be careful not to start something worse than what Zarkon had wanted to do. Anyone power hungry could easily dominate the universe with both…

She sighed as she watched the ships dock with the castle. They would be talking soon, and she was nervous.

 

–

 

Allura stood, waiting to greet Lotor and his entourage. Her breath was short and nearly making her dizzy. Watching him stride down the hangar, she forced herself to be calm. She had cried so much, especially when he had last been here. She couldn’t keep doing it. That would never be acceptable as an empress. Having started coming to terms with everything she’d done, his normally calm demeanor would be a great relief.

She smiled and curtsied low as he approached. He responded by placing his hand over his heart and bowing in front of her. Allura nearly lost her nerve and cried on the spot. Spotting Dayak’s sharp eye behind him made her second guess that as her breath caught.

Shiro was with her and Coran, on Allura’s request. It seemed better to get all of that out in the open, so Lotor knew what to expect. What _she_ didn’t expect was Acxa. Her eyes went wide when she spotted her.

Lotor smiled softly. “It’s fine, Princess. There have been, and will continue to be, many long discussions this movement, it would seem.” He turned his elbow out towards her, and she wrapped her hand around his arm. Even through the cloth, he was warm. It made her remember that the last time she had touched him was when she had healed him in Sincline in the quintessence field. She took a deep breath to calm herself as he then led her down the hall.

Allura hadn’t been paying attention, so when she realized they were alone and he was leading her to her rooms, her anxiety spiked. She could feel his eyes on her, and she looked up at him.

“It would be better to not draw out difficult decisions, do you not agree? Unless you still need an extra quintant. I do apologize for returning earlier than anticipated.”

“No, it’s… fine, really. And yes, we should speak.”

They continued in silence back to her rooms. Once inside, she let go of his arm and channeled her nervousness into trying to be a good host.

“Would you like tea?”

“No, it’s fine, unless you would like some.”

Her mouth felt dry, and her mind remembered something else entirely. She reached into the same cabinet that held her tea set, but she pulled out a decanter.

“Perhaps something… stronger?”

She turned to look at him, and watched his eyebrows lift a bit.

“That… is preferable, Princess.”

Allura almost giggled, but held her tongue. She brought the decanter and matching goblets to the small sitting area of the room. Filling both glasses, she handed one to Lotor as they both sat.

“There was a number of consumables thankfully kept in cryofridgeration. This is one of the few remaining bottles of wine left from Altea.”

She watched as his eyes grew wide, staring down into the red liquid in his goblet.

“Altean….”

“There is no reason to not use it, especially if we perhaps will have something to celebrate.”

His eyes shot up to hers, but she continued talking.

“Before that, we do need to continue our conversation about what… happened. I have yet to apologize for everything I did wrong.”

She paused, watching as he eyebrows pinched. Taking a sip of her drink, she hoped to encourage him to do so as well. It worked, and he brought the glass up to his lips. Watching him drink, she continued her thought out words.

“Lotor, I will never be able to apologize enough for not letting you speak on that day. It should not have mattered what Romelle said, you are... special to me, and I should have respected you enough to let you explain yourself. Instead, I hurt you and let you be taken.”

He pursed his lips and didn’t respond, staring into the liquid.

“My actions directly led to a terrible chain of events, which will haunt me for a long time to come.” Her eyes burned with tears but she held herself as regally as she could. “I said horrible things to you that I deeply regret. We should have been beyond that, but I have come to understand I still bear a terrible grudge against what happened to my people, and my parents… and I was taking it out on you merely for who you are and what you represent. I apologize for that, and will be working to correct myself.”

Allura couldn’t look at him. After a moment where she could barely breath, she glanced back up. His eyes were closed, and she could see his hand holding the glass shaking ever so slightly. She bit her lip, the dull ache keeping her from sobbing.

“Lotor, you are… you are not at all like your father. At least... not the Zarkon that came back from the quintessence field all those deca-phoebs ago. But,” she paused again, taking a deep breath. “Before the war, I knew him a bit. I was quite small, then. I don’t know if anyone has told you, but he was my godfather.” She watched as his eyes opened to stare at her. “I remember him being very kind to me, and… actually, wait just a tick,” she said as she set her glass on the small table by the settee and jumped up, running into her bedroom.

She was only gone briefly before returning. With a sad expression, she held out an object for him to take.

“Your father, Zarkon of Daibazaal, gave me this as a present when I was an infant.”

She held out the winged helmet to him. When she was little it had been quite large on her, but now that she was a fully grown adult, she realized how much of a child’s play toy it really was.

Lotor set down the goblet and reached out with trembling hands to take it from her. She watched as he turned it around in his hands.

“It’s quite an old style,” he whispered in a hoarse voice.

“Yes, I imagine that it is. You weren’t even born then.”

He looked up at her. His eyes were brimming with tears. Her vision blurred with her own, but she reached out and put her hands atop his.

“I spoke to you in anger last movement, it was unacceptable to say something I knew would be so hurtful. The Zarkon that you are like is the one who gave me this present, Lotor. Not what he was turned into by the rift creatures, the _real_ Emperor Zarkon.”

She bit her lip as she watched him close his eyes and look away from her, a few tears running down his face. Allura softly stroked her thumbs on his. They stayed that way for several doboshes. Eventually, he opened his eyes again.

“It would seem our lives are far more linked than I ever realized, Princess.”

She smiled a sad smile and removed her hands.

“Indeed.”

He looked at the helmet again before gently placing it onto the table. Allura watched with fascination as Lotor picked up his glass and took a large gulp before turning back to her.

“I appreciate your words, Allura. Thank you.” She only nodded, to speak would mean breaking into sobs. “You are not the only one who needs to apologize. I was wrong in how I replied to you. No matter how angry I was, I should have... showed more restraint.”

She couldn’t breath and he kept talking.

“I was furious and... beyond myself. It has never been my intention to eradicate anyone from the universe. I hope you understand that.”

She wanted nothing more than to place her hands on his cheeks and stare into his eyes, maybe kiss him. Instead she balled her fists up.

“I understand. We-I pushed you too far, I’m sorry, Lotor.”

He looked away, and then down at her hands. When he glanced back at her, his expression had softened.

“You indicated we might be celebrating…?”

Despite everything, Allura couldn’t help but feel her face grow hot and a smile was on her lips as she relaxed her hands. She felt like a young girl being asked for her first kiss.

“Y-yes, I have decided your alliance proposal is acceptable and in the best interest of all involved. I would… like to marry you, Emperor Lotor.”

Relief blossomed across his face and his eyes weren’t pinched at all any longer.

“I’m glad, Princess. Everything will be easier for us.”

That feeling of being a pawn began creeping up. She couldn’t help but look away.

“Allura.”

His voice was commanding, and her stomach dropped. She slowly returned her eyes to his.

She was ill prepared for him to lean in and kiss her softly on the lips. Her anxiety started to ease, but when she tilted her head and pushed for him to open his mouth and deepen the kiss, he turned his away and pulled back from her. Her chest felt tight as Shiro’s words came flying back at her.

“ _He’s guarding his heart.”_

She blinked away the tears as she looked at the floor. _Perhaps another time…_

They sat in silence for a few ticks before he spoke.

“There will be some… traditions we must adhere to. Some are a little dated, but as emperor I believe I should still participate. I hope you won’t be alarmed if a bit of blood is involved.”

She _was_ alarmed, but it also reminded her of the claelur.

“I will… try to bear it all with a sense of grace. There is also a tradition I must discuss with you.” She nearly giggled as he quirked an eyebrow. It showed his changing mood and return to his normal temperment.

Allura stood and walked to the table they had sat at during their previous conversation. She returned to sit next to him, a little bit closer, as she held out her hands with the star crystal between them. He reached out and held the back of her hands so he could see it better.

“This is a claelur. It’s something that an Altean woman gives to her intended. She pulls the center star, and the whole thing falls apart. I’m supposed to do that and give you a shard each time you please me, until it is fully reformed. Then it would have been used to hold my bridal gown together. The tradition was intended to make sure the bond was good enough before the marriage, or the ceremony could not take place.” She paused and bit her lip before continuing. “On the wedding night, you would then take back what’s yours, leaving me without any…. and it continues on from there.”

“I… see.” He actually seemed as embarrassed as she felt.

“I am most likely the last to have one, as the crystals they’re made from were only on Altea, and usually a new one was given to a girl, not taken from her parents. Sometimes they were passed around, it varied a little, this one belonged to my grandparents. It’s possible my mother’s is somewhere in the castle. The Alteans on your colony might… have them.”

“I am unaware, but I have never attended a wedding while there. Allura, if we have any daughters, I will be sure to… keep this tradition. You don’t need to worry about being the last.”

He squeezed her hands a little at the same time a thought popped up she wished had not; Honerva’s claelur would have been destroyed with Daibazaal. Her heart ached.

“How do we start?”

She gave Lotor a pained smiled.

“I had not planned on following the full tradition. It would never work for our situation.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Very few would know or care, and it might be better to pretend things had turned out differently. I had hoped we could… skip the shard pieces part.”

“This is important to you, is it not?”

She sighed. “Yes, but... I already destroyed that possibility on my own. We’ll be altering it. Here.” She pressed the crystal into one of his palms. “You have already pleased me greatly by what you have asked of me. It is enough.”

Lotor frowned heavily at her.

“Allura, since the situation is so tense and we are having a political marriage, I won’t argue most of this with you, however…,” he pressed the crystal back into her palms, “I would prefer if perhaps we participate in this tradition _after_ the ceremony.”

“...after?”

“Yes, I… oh, quiznack I’m doing exactly what I swore I would not.”

Allura was too upset to laugh at his uncharacteristic outburst of the word he had picked up from them, but she wanted to.

“Lotor?”

“Allura, I am still quite… disappointed with everything, and… that won’t change for a while. However, we said we would be honest with one another, correct?” She nodded. “Then I will be honest with you, and it’s far more than I intended to say to you at this point in time, so bear with me.”

He sighed, and closed his eyes. When he did not continue for quite some time, she grew concerned.

“Are you all right?”

Looking up at her, he frowned.

“I am not. But I will manage. Your tradition might be of assistance, Princess.”

She waited patiently for him to explain, his hands still overtop of hers with the star between.

“I...hmm, that is….” he took a deep breath. “Let us do something else, instead. After the ceremony, you shall let the star break into its pieces. Then, whenever one of us is pleased, no matter how big or small, we will gift a shard to the other. Together, we will rebuild your star, Allura, and perhaps, in time, our relationship.”

Her lip quivered.

“It’s your star, now, Lotor.”

“No, it’s _o_ _ur_ star.”

Allura didn’t even try to stop herself from crying. Lotor learned over, and gave her a light kiss on the cheek. The princess sobbed harder.


	4. Bonding Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!TRIGGER WARNING!!
> 
> I have added some tags. There is mention of minor cutting and blood in this chapter, please proceed with caution if that is a problem for you.
> 
> That aside, let us continue on this journey of healing, together. ( ˘ ³˘)♥

Lotor placed an ornate blade into Allura’s hand.

“Now, Princess, the point _is_ to make me bleed.”

“You can’t be serious.”

For the first time since before that cursed quintant, he laughed. “I am very serious.”

“But… Lotor, I really don’t like this, not after I...”

“I assure you, Princess, this is quite different.”

She frowned hard at him.

“Perhaps I should have explained it in more detail; it is a display of trust.”

Her heart was beating so fast and loud she could hear it.

“I’m not sure I understand.”

“I am baring my neck to you, Allura, and you are pressing a blade against it, one that is sharp enough to slit my throat should you decide to press harder. I am defenseless and at your mercy.”

She looked away and answered him in a whisper. “You said you didn’t trust me. I know I don’t deser-”

Lotor put his thumb on her lips. Her eyes went wide.

“Consider this a test. You can’t prove yourself to me if I never give you the chance, now can you?” Her lips were trembling so badly she was sure he felt it. “It will be difficult to share a marriage bed with you if I’m not sure I will survive until morning.”

She tried to swallow. She hadn’t even thought that far ahead.

“I… I suppose it is a good way to test me if all your trusted people are here. I’m sure Dayak would have something to say if I...harmed you… again.”

He sighed. “She would indeed have a few cross words for you if you did something to me now. I warn you, she knows what happened, and I have _instructed_ her to not give you a difficult time, Allura. I cannot guarantee she won’t bring up unsavory topics, but I believe she is determined to aid you in becoming a fierce empress for me.”

Her eyes were still wide and she was trying to blink. Her mouth refused to work.

“Dayak already found you acceptable. I believe now if we complete this tradition, it will return you to a better light with not only her, but all the Galra I have with me. They will spread word around the empire how you have embraced our traditions, much like my mother once did.”

Allura let that statement sit in the air for a moment.

“My paladins will be quite shocked when we show up to the meeting with blood smeared on our faces… I have not even told most of them what’s going on.”

“Well then, my future Empress, we will bring them up to speed with a Galra right of passage.”

She bit her lip and brought the blade up.

“Are you sure? And then you have to cut me, too?”

“Yes, but we can use my blood for both of us if it’s something you do not wish to do.”

She continued frowning. “I… should probably do it, if I am to be empress. It would be a bit of a farce skipping something expected of me. I am going through with this marriage, I will do it properly.”

Lotor smiled at her and tiled his head.

“It’s sharp, you don’t need to do much.”

Allura lifted the blade and shakily held it next to his jaw as she watched him slowly close his eyes. She took a deep breath and touched the edge along the underside of his jaw where it met his neck. This really was all a test of trust, and a willingness to bleed for your mate, but there was something very sexual about it. Pressing the blade slightly, she slid it a little bit before removing it again. His blood began oozing around the cut.

“I… are you okay?”

He laughed, it was light and heartfelt.

“Yes, now run your finger across and draw the design you chose onto my face,” he said as he straightened his head, eyes still closed. The fact he did this while she still had the blade in her hand made her tear up. She expected them to have taken a very long time to get this far but… his natural disposition just wasn’t to stay upset. And perhaps it would have been difficult to continue with _marriage_ plans if he was continually furious and utterly distrustful of her.

Allura set the blade on the table and moved onto her knees on the settee, hovering over him. She gasped when she felt one of his hands grab her thigh on the back. The sound made the corner of his mouth twitch, but he was otherwise still and quiet.

Putting her hand under the clean side of his jaw to stabilize herself, Allura took her smallest finger on the other hand and ran it along the blood and cut on his skin. Then she touched his face. It was difficult trying to remember the exact shape she wanted. It had been slightly pointed in ways she hadn’t been used to. She pulled her finger back from his upper cheek, pleased with herself, and repeated what she had done on the other side of his face.

“Allura… are you doing what I think you are doing?”

“Maybe,” she said with a tenderness, and she heard his breath catch.

He opened his eyes and peered up at her. It was a soft look she had thought she would never see again, and it made her tear up as she tried to finish her work. He had a light smile.

“This is twice now you’ve given me Altean markings....”

“I’m not sure I can take credit for the first time, you were born with them, after all.”

“Yes, but without you, we never would have been to Oriande and my markings wouldn’t have glowed. I would have never known I even had any, Allura.”

She tried to keep her face smooth so she wouldn’t cry outright.

“I suppose, Princess, I should prepare myself for you to take even the most ruthless of Galra traditions and make them meaningful and soft.”

She tried blinking away the tears forming. “Per-perhaps, but only if you let me.”

His expression turned serious, but he didn’t respond. She sat back on her heels, and picked the blade up off the table. She held it out for him to take, and let her eyelids close.

“You don’t have to shut your eyes.”

“You did.”

“That was… I was merely….” He trailed off.

“… giving me a chance to prove myself, yes. I am returning the gesture, Lotor. You could have been deceiving me this entire time, as I wrongfully assumed you had been when someone merely hinted at the possibility. But now I am showing that I trust you. I bare my neck to you, that I am defenseless, and at your mercy.”

Her eyes had stayed shut the entire time she spoke, but she could feel his intense gaze on her as she repeated his words back to him. The dagger slowly left her hand, and her heart raced. Lotor could easily take her life, finish what his father had started against her family so many deca-phoebs ago, or get revenge for what she had done to him. He would barely need to move to do it. There would be nobody to bring _her_ back.

It felt like an eon passed without him moving closer to her.

“Allura… please look at me.”

She did as he asked, and his expression was harrowing.

“You were shaking like a leaf.”

“I was?”

“You were. I appreciate your courage, I don’t think you know how much it means to me.” He was nearly whispering.

Moving closer to her, he brought the blade next to her jaw, the opposite one she had for him.

“We could use a numbing agent if you’d prefer, Princess.”

“You keep stalling, I’m beginning to wonder if you’re reluctant to do this.”

She wasn’t looking directly at him, but she could see his eyes flash.

“It would seem I have been found out.”

“Lotor…”

He hummed. “If you’re sure...”

“Yes, please, everyone is probably wondering where we have been all this time. We need to go shock them properly.”

Her heart felt light as she heard him laugh again.

“Please, do not move.”

She smiled slightly and otherwise was still as she closed her eyes again. She felt the blade touch her, and then a stinging. Her fists balled up, but she didn’t even flinch. She heard him removing his glove. There was a pressure across the cut, and she bit her lip.

“I can stop if you’d like...”

Allura made an irritated noise at him, and Lotor responded with a humming laugh. He softly pushed the hair back from in front of her ears. His finger swiped across the side of her cheek three times. Then he touched the cut once more. The swipes were repeated on the other side. He pressed the wound a final time, and then made a curved triangle shape on either side of her chin, and twice on her forehead, near the far corners of her eyes. She was baffled what he was doing.

“I apologize, I believe some of your hair has touched the blood.”

She opened her eyes and looked at him. “It was inevitable. What did you draw?”

He smirked at her.

“Since the intention is something meaningful to the mate, to show an attentive nature, and you are the heart of Voltron….”

She laughed loudly, and watched as he became incredibly flustered.

“You made me Voltron?”

He looked away, and she grabbed his chin to turn him back to face her.

“I supposed this does indicate you ‘dominated Voltron,’ does it not?” His look of embarrassment increased. “Lotor, I’m not mad, this was very… adorable.”

He frowned. “I am not sure the Emperor of the Galra wants to be told he is ‘adorable.’”

Despite everything, Allura giggled. He relaxed as she did, and she realized how close their faces were. The drying blood over his markings gave him a dangerous look, especially with one side slightly dripping. She was sure there as something symbolic about it, but she was too distracted to keep thinking when he closed the gap between them and pressed his lips against hers.

Allura didn’t try for more. She let the soft pressure take over her senses. When he pushed her mouth open with his tongue, she followed his lead. His touch was tender, and brief, and then it was over. Lotor sat back, away from her, and looked at the floor. She stayed silent.

After several awkward doboshes, he suggested they join the ongoing council meeting. Allura agreed, and they left, heading for one of the meeting rooms. Lotor told her that Kolivan had informed him he would be joining them today as well, and he fully expected him to have arrived already. That was why his entourage had arrive a bit early. Something needed their attention sooner rather than later.

 

–

 

The door to the meeting room opened. There was silence, before Allura heard Lance yell a loud “WHAT IS THAT?!” from the back, as Hunk gestured to his chin and pointed to her. She squeezed Lotor’s arm.

There was a scraping noise as every Galra in the room stood from their chairs and bowed, fists across their chest. Krolia even pulled Keith up to stand by the back of his shirt.

Kolivan, who had barely arrived before them, was the first to speak.

“Congratulations, Emperor, Princess.” Echos of his words from the others filled the room.

Shiro stood. “Please, if you could explain what’s going on….”

Dayak was the one to answer.

"The Emperor has been accepted by his bride, and they have performed the ceremony of Tar’Kasa, the Bonding Blood. It is the first of the rituals that take place in a formal marriage.”

“MARRia-” Lance began to shriek out before Hunk slapped his hand over his friend’s mouth.

“Congratulations, Emperor Lotor and Princess Allura,” Shiro said and then glanced at the paladins, down his side of the table. “I’m sure nobody is going to voice any disagreements to what you have both willfully chosen for your futures.”

Coran was by their side in an instant. “Congratulations! Oh, what a rumdriggling day! Have you begun the claelur?”

Allura turned her head and pressed her nose into Lotor’s arm in a pathetic and very unregal attempt to hide herself. The princess felt more shy in this moment than she had in her entire life. Lotor placed his hand on top of hers, and then slightly squeezed.

“Ahh, no, due to timing and situation, Allura has expressed an interest in altering how we go about that particular tradition. It will still be adhered to, but in a bit of a reverse order. I hope you understand, Coran.”

The advisor smiled. “Of course! The entire point of the crystal is for the bride to be pleased by the process.”

Allura pushed her nose harder into his arm as her fingers dug into his elbow. She felt like she would overheat and faint on the spot. _Bride!_

 

–

 

The meeting continued as normal. Allura found herself in awe watching Lotor. He was going about business as if she hadn’t murdered him a week ago, and as if they hadn’t agreed to marry one another today.

Lotor’s bloody marks on his face were completely dried, dark and menacing. However, there was no more reactions to them from anyone else. It felt strange to Allura, but also wonderful. The shape was a clear indication of his Altean heritage, but none of the Galra present showed any changes in how they treated him. If anything, it made them respect him _more_. Her stomach fluttered, and he caught her looking at him. Under the table, he touched her hand in her lap, and when she shifted it, he grasped her fingers while they continued to listen to the movement reports on Sendak.

There was something about a small fleet in an unstable region, one they could easily overwhelm without Voltron. A larger fleet would be sent to obliterate the soldiers who refused to join Lotor. Allura was glad everything could be solved without their direct involvement for once. They needed to focus on themselves.

There was to be a large dinner after the meeting. Dayak insisted they have an official celebration meal, and that it be held on Lotor’s main cruiser. She strongly told Allura that she needed to show off her face to every high ranking Galra. Her stomach was flipping in nervousness. There was absolutely no changing her mind now, even if she had wanted to!

 

–

 

Looking in the mirror as she prepared for the evening, her breath caught at the sight of her face. The deep colored, dark lines were sharp on her skin, and she realized how ferocious it looked with the formal gown she had chosen. Thinking for a few ticks, she decided to bring all of her hair up, but not in a bun. She set about with a golden tasseled band, and did what she had heard her paladins once call a “pony tail,” whatever a “pony” was. Her hair swooshed back and forth as she moved, and it made her smile.

For the first time in ages, she decided it was time to change the hair around her face. Rummaging in her jewelry case, she pulled out several golden ornaments. Pulling the hair back from the sides of her face, several bloody strands and all, she pinned them back into the rest of her hair. It took a few minutes to make the shorter pieces of hair be reasonable, but when she looked at how it showed off more of the Tar’kasa lines, she was glad she decided to do it.

Removing her normal earrings, she replaced them with some long, dangling golden ones. These would bring attention to the sides of her face and the marks Lotor had drawn, framing them. Her large, Black Lion cat whiskers, in blood, drawn on her by her Galran prince. _Her prince._ Allura closed her eyes, still with that small smile on her face, and let herself feel calm about everything. Maybe a little excited.

Allura had put on the most formal gown she owned. It was something she had worn once to a ball, one that had been a bit too ostentatious considering they had been at war. It had all been an intention to raise spirits. She tried to decide if this was a good or bad omen on her part, to wear it now, but decided she would just not mention it to anyone. She doubted Coran would even remember, he had barely seen her that night so many deca-phoebs ago.

The gown was deep, dark pink with gold, a show of solidarity to the Alteans who had fallen to the Galra at the time. She wondered if she should change it, but decided it was probably for the best to wear it at a time like this… announcing she was to marry a half Altean prince, the _Emperor_ of the Galra.

It was off the shoulder, a golden band running around her shoulders to hold it up. Her anxiety spiked when she turned and noticed the marks from his teeth when he had bitten her neck as a specter were still plainly visible. She stared, and considered the situation in great detail. _Everyone_ knew she had been with Lotor the day after she had healed him. In the castle, they knew it had been a long, uninterrupted discussion. Alone. In her rooms. The Galra would assume, rightfully so, that to have asked her to be his empress, he would have spoken to her about it in private. Alone. Probably in her rooms.

Allura’s face went hot with embarrassment. If the clearly sharp teeth shaped wounds were from anyone else, it would be a direct insult to Lotor to have it seen. Perhaps if she flaunted what would be assumed his lust for her, it would be beneficial to their upcoming union. It was plain anyone would think he had done that in a fit of _romantic_ passion in her arms, and not when he was dead and angry at her. But considering he really had done that when she was naked and he was inside her, in more than one way it turned out. She supposed it wasn’t a terrible thing if the Galra felt Lotor liked her enough he had perhaps lost a little control while having his way with her. After the bloody ritual, they might even see it as very favorable. She fanned her face to calm the embarrassment. It wasn’t as if they hadn’t already…

“ _I had no idea it would be so beautiful,” she said looking out into the brightly colored space of the quintessence field in the rift._

“ _Neither did I,” she heard him whisper, his voice suddenly very close to her, “when I first heard the Altean Princess had reappeared after so many years.”_

_Allura turned to him. He had removed his helmet, and his eyes were on her, a light smile on his lips._

“ _Lotor, what-”_

“ _Princess, will… you remove your helmet?”_

_She never thought Lotor could possibly look shy. The memory if him gripping her hip the other day made her flush, but she reached up and unhooked her helmet before removing it. He smiled softly at her, and ran a finger along her cheek and down her jaw._

_Her heart was racing, and she watched as he slowly leaned closer to her. Her eyelids fluttered closed just as his lips touched hers. He was soft, so very soft, and it had to be at least a dobosh before he coaxed her lips to part._

_His tongue touched hers tenderly. Allura reached with a hand behind his ear, and moved it along to the back of his neck. She decided to be bold, and grabbed a fistful of his hair. He groaned into her mouth, turning her stomach to butterflies, and she responded by pushing at his tongue with hers. That action was like a switch had been turned on, and Lotor all but pounced on her, pulling her from the seat and pushing her back into the controls of the ship._

_There was a beeping, and he broke the kiss long enough to smack some buttons to turn the whole console dormant under her backside. All the status lights went with it, plunging them into near darkness, illuminated only by the glow from outside the ship._

_Grinning up at her, he didn’t wait to push his mouth back against hers, and she responded in kind. Zippers and fasteners came undone under their fingers, and Allura’s flight suit was pulled down, nearly completely off. Being completely nude under his watchful eye sent a heady lust through her entire body. Lotor pushed himself between her knees. He ripped his gloves off, and she shivered as she felt his bare hand on her knee, moving down the inside of her thigh. She’d never felt so wanton before, and she realized it might be the quintessence._

“ _Lotor… I think we’re being influenced by...”_

_He pressed his nose under her jaw, and kissed her a few times._

“ _The quintessence only heightens things you already desire, **Allura**.” The way he purred out her name sent a thrill up her. “I have wanted you for so long...”_

_The way he said that made her grab him by the waist and pull him closer. She looked up at him._

“ _Then take me, Lotor.”_

_His eyes went wide before narrowing, and a grin split across his face. She didn’t give him a chance to do anything. Her hand slide in the opening of the cloth over his stomach, and she ran her fingers along his taut muscles. Sliding down, she felt him clench under her touch. His other hand grasped tightly at her hip._

_Allura embraced how much she wanted him. He was right, she had always felt freer with him, not confined by constantly having her choices undermined. Lotor was the only one who understood her and what she had been through... and what she was capable of. He **respected** her. _

_She ran her other hand up his arm, across the wide shoulders of his uniform, and before he could kiss her like he looked like he was about to, she grabbed his hair again and pulled his head back. She bit her lip for a brief moment as she looked at him, before running her tongue along his neck. The growl in his throat in response vibrated his skin under her touch, and she nipped at him a few times, making him then gasp for air through gritted teeth._

_The hand on her thigh moved quickly up, and it was her turn to gasp as he didn’t waste any time before his fingers were between her legs and rubbing at her. Her senses were absolutely heightened, and she was moaning and gripping his hair harder in pleasure. He chuckled as she made a whining noise against his throat, unable to prevent herself from coming against his hand so quickly._

“ _So very ready for me, Princess…,” he whispered in a jovial tone._

_She let go of his hair and leaned back onto the cool metal of the ship to gasped for breath. Closing her eyes, she listened as he ripped his remaining armor off. When she opened them again, he was pulling at his undersuit._

_Allura could barely breath when he stripped himself bare. He was bigger than she expected, and she was alarmed. There was no time to voice her concerns, as he pressed against her body again, one of his arms around her back, the other on her hip. She grabbed at his sides and held him close. Peppering kisses up her neck, she felt him move his hand off her hip, and then there was a pressure pushing inside her. She breathed against his cheek as he slowly thrust into her repeatedly, taking his time to gradually move farther in each time._

“ _Relax,” he whispered in her ear._

_As soon as she did, he slid himself the rest of the way in, and groaned loudly. It didn’t hurt like she had been worried about, and when he pulled back and sunk back in, she heard herself make a small gasp of pleasure. He groaned again as he continued plunging into her, working up to a feverish pace. Allura wrapped her legs around his waist, stabilizing them, and began to lick at the beads of sweat all over his skin._

“ _You’re almost like a dream,” he panted against her, and she clutched at his shoulders, pulling him into a deep kiss._

Allura was gripping the side of her vanity at the memory, and she decided then and there that she would continue to wear the dress that showed off his bite mark. If anyone so much as commented, she would inform them he had given it to her when he first made love to her in the Sincline ship in the quintessence field between realities. She doubted very much that Lotor would contradict her version of events.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates will be sporadic from here on out, sorry!


	5. A Telling Mark

The chirping of the door alerted Allura to Shiro and Coran arriving to escort her to the Galra ship. After joining them outside, she started down the hall.

“Princess, you look quite nice.”

“Ahh, thank you, Shiro. A shame everyone else is only able to wear their paladin armor.”

“Yes, about that, they’re waiting for us in the lounge. I tried to field their questions but they weren’t interested in hearing my opinion on it.”

She sighed. This was a difficult conversation she had been avoiding. It suddenly seemed so much easier to talk to Lotor now about what had happened than her own paladins.

“Thank you, Shiro.”

“Princess,” Coran began, “are you quite sure you want to wear that dress?”

She looked at him wide eyed. Had he remembered when she last wore it?

“You neck…,” he said pointing to his own.

Allura tried to school her expression.

“I am aware, thank you, Coran. I intend to make... a statement.”

Shiro stopped midstep, and she looked up at him.

“Are you sure about that? Have you asked Lotor? It looks almost like he….” The meaning dawned on Shiro’s face, and he raised his eyebrows. His voice went low and soft. “Princess, does he know he injured you to that degree?”

She smiled. “Yes, he is well aware, and I assure you that I am fine. Please, let’s not focus on this.”

Coran and Shiro looked at one another with worried expressions as she began to walk down the hallway.

 

–

 

Allura stood looking at her paladins, all seated in the rounded lounge. They were quiet, and she was worried this would go badly.

“Paladins, I know there’s been some changes and-”

“You’re damn right! What the he-” Lance interrupted Allura and started to yell, but _he_ was interrupted by Shiro.

“LANCE. You need to be silent when your superior is speaking.”

Allura frowned as she watched Lance get incredibly flustered and angry.

“As I was saying, I know we’ve had some extreme changes occur recently. While I appreciate all of your opinions and work, a large portion of this is more personal, and relates towards my life prior to even the beginning of the war with the Galra.” She realized she was wringing her hands and tried to stop.

“I know this is abrupt for you all, but Lotor’s family and mine have been tied since before I was born, and well before the time when your own civilization began. In an effort to permanently end all strife, Lotor and I will be working closely together to maintain peace. This, as you’ve already found out, involves a marriage alliance between myself and Lotor. I did not come to this decision lightly.”

She watched as Pidge slowly raised her hand.

“Pidge? Is there something you wished to say?”

‘Uhm yeah, what about all those Alteans he killed? You can’t possibly be considering this if he really did that.”

Allura took a deep breath, but before she could answer, Keith did.

“I made a mistake. He didn’t really kill them, it was more…,” he glanced up at Allura. “It was a more complicated situation than that. Lotor hasn’t been killing anyone, not on purpose. We should have listened to him.”

She looked to Keith, and then back to Allura. “He… didn’t? Then what was at that facility? And what about what Romelle said?”

“No, Pidge, he didn’t. We were all mistaken and he paid a horrible price for our ignorance and rash judgments,” Allura began. “For the entirety of the war, well, what we’ve been calling the war, Lotor has been working out various ways to try and stabilize the universe, or at least try to. It was wrong of me, and all of us, to just assume he was some evil entity trying to harm others. Even… even if he has done some questionable things on occasion, you must remember that sometimes sacrifices end up happening when moving towards a better future. I understand it can be unsavory, but I believe we have all learned that sometimes not everyone can always be saved. That we must continue to move forward and try to do the best we can, with the situation we have, to prevent widespread suffering from occurring. Aligning myself with Emperor Lotor and being his Empress puts myself and Voltron into the best position possible to bring peace to the galaxy, and I won’t trade that for anything.”

“Yeah but, do you even love him?” Lance said, nearly whispering.

“LANCE!” Shiro and Keith both yelled at the same time.

Allura struggled on how to answer, but she was saved by Coran.

“Princess Allura has always understood that her marriage might not be one of personal feeling, but of politics. I’m not sure how things work on your home world, but it’s not always necessary for one of royal blood to have strong feelings to tie herself to another for stability.”

“We’re just worried for you,” Hunk said softly. Allura smiled.

“I will be fine. I know it is a bit… complicated to understand, but Emperor Lotor does care for me. Even after…” She closed her eyes for a tick, trying to compose herself but another thought occurred to her. “Actually, I’m going to request that you cease this line of questioning for now, it has no bearing on the situation or the outcome. His feelings towards me are my concern alone.”

The wary and upset looks of her paladins made her heart ache. She smiled again to try and revive the mood.

“Please, I ask you all to be on your best behavior for this dinner. I am relying on you to give the Galra a favorable impression of us all, and to prove to them why you are my paladins. I know this is something I can trust you with.”

She began to briskly walk out of the room. Before she made it outside, she heard someone ask where Romelle even was. Coran began to explain to them that because of her readiness to attack Lotor or anyone close to him, she had been placed in the containment cell as a precaution and would not be joining them.

 

–

 

Much like when Allura had visited the ship before, the combined Altean and Galra flags still hung in the large entrance hall. Her heart ached at how he had done that in such good faith, and she had ruined it. It took a lot of her energy to keep herself calm and focused when all she wanted to do was cry in her own sorrow when she thought about how he must have felt when he first returned to his cruiser.

Also like before, it was lined on either side. This time, however, it wasn’t sentries, but Galra of all rank. She even spied a few children.

Walking down towards the far end, she was a little beyond halfway, dress train trailing behind her, when Lotor descended the stairs to meet her midway. He had a faint smile on his lips, and she could see the moment when he realized his teeth marks were visible on her skin to everyone. His eyes popped, and the smile faded. Her anxiety spiked.

Reaching her, she saw a smoldering to his eyes that she hadn’t seen since they had been alone in the rift. When he held out his outstretched palm, she slowly slid her hand into his. Without missing a beat, he pulled her towards him and leaned his head over the bite mark. She felt his lips kiss her there, staying far longer than she was sure was proper. Every single person in the huge hallway would be sure to know what he was doing.

Allura felt like she would faint by how quickly her face heated in embarrassment. She was convinced that maybe her cheeks had darkened to match their bloody marks, and when she glanced up at his face, he was smiling at her. His dark Altean marks made her heart flutter with excitement. She went to say something to him, but he took her hand and led her back down the hall and up the stairs before she had a chance.

 

–

 

The whole affair was at a long table. He had her at his right, which given the importance of the spot might as well have been them up on a throne dais. To _her_ right was Kolivan, and straight across from her was Shiro. To his left was Thace, and Allura tried to focus on the whole dinner and not the elaborate way they had managed to save that man’s life instead of him pointlessly sacrificing himself like some poorly written child’s tale. Allura began to wonder why Dayak wasn’t close to them, but when she heard the governess lecturing her paladins on the importance of the Tar’Kasa ceremony down the table, she understood what a strategic placement he had put his trusted governess in.

Lotor barely spoke to her at the dinner, but he glanced at her quite often. She was concerned, but at the same time, tried to stay calm and considered the possibility he just wasn’t sure how to talk to her around everyone else after everything that had happened.

As stoic as Kolivan usually was, he did keep a conversation going. At one point, the color of her dress came up. When Allura told him the significance, his eyes widened and he asked her if she also knew the full implications of her wearing a gown that also publicly showed the bite mark on her neck.

“I had, uhm…, “she tried to whisper as low as possible, “moved forward with the consideration of how it cemented Lotor’s... regard for me.”

Kolivan slightly frowned. “Princess, if you’ll forgive me, I need to explain the entirety of what you’ve declared.”

Her heart sank. Had she made a poor decision so soon?

“Please, do not despair, it’s not a grave situation, quite the reverse.” Her expression must have been obvious, but he waited a few ticks as someone passed behind them and out of earshot. “If the Emperor has such a… taste for you, Princess, that strengthens the union. But that is not the primary consideration. You have now very publicly shown a willingness to bend to his will, even if it means a personal discomfort or puts you in a painful position, both in a literal and non literal sense.”

Allura was struggling to understand how much more she had implied than intended.

“As Empress, you will have to make many decisions you might not find palatable, and by displaying a wound given by the Emperor on your person, you have consciously decided to show everyone in attendance tonight that you are willing to do what is necessary for a favorable end to all those involved. It’s quite the statement, especially unspoken, and from the one who possesses Voltron.”

She took a breath and reached for her wine glass to try and occupy herself. She’d never even considered all of this.

“This means, Princess, he made you bleed before you accepted him, and you still choose to stand by his side, regardless of your feelings on the act itself. It makes the Tar’Kasa ceremony even more significant. There’s no reason for anyone to doubt your devotion to him, and very importantly, his needs, and by extension, his empire’s needs.”

The last part made her feel like a knife had been stabbed into her heart. She had betrayed him so thoroughly and it was a miracle he was even talking to her at all, let alone all this. She glanced at Lotor out of the corner of her eye. He was watching her, and she realized most likely he could hear everything Kolivan was saying. The man’s voice was deep and not easily masked, even by speaking low.

Looking back to her glass, she stared into the liquid inside. She could feel Lotor’s eyes still on her. And Kolivan’s words… he knew what they had done to him in the quintessence field. What she had done. She knew he would have heard it straight from Lotor, _and_ from Keith. There had been a Blade meeting with Lotor. Keith had told her of it, since they had purposefully omitted him and he was not thrilled over it. The meeting was intending to decide future involvements of them with Voltron. Thankfully, it had been decided to not completely disregard everything, but changes were inevitable. Kolivan broke her out of her thoughts once more.

“I need to stress to you that your display tonight has cemented his claim to the throne nearly as completely as the Kral Zera itself does. You are the one with Voltron. You have the Black Lion, his father’s Lion, the Galra Lion, and the Emperor showed up to take his throne on that very same Lion. Your current paladin for that Lion is half Galra, much like the Emperor himself. Now that you have accepted him, with you comes the control of the rest of the Lions. Together with Sincline, the Fire of Purification won’t stand a chance, no matter how much Sendak fights. Your marriage completely ends the entire struggle, decidedly.”

Allura stared into her glass further. Kolivan took a deep breath and drank from his. Setting it back down, he continued.

“Your position as future empress will not be questioned as of tonight. You need not be embarrassed.”

She looked at him. “I… I mean, is it that obvious? To tell you the truth, much of it is mortifying because of my previous actions against him, not so much my neck.” She glanced briefly at Lotor again.

“Princess, I know you are still upset by what occurred, but you are doing an admirable job of rectifying the situation. I suggest you consider what your display today has done for supporting his decision to give you a second chance… on a more personal level.”

Her eyes shot up to Lotor. He was looking down at a plate of dessert in front of him, but she could swear his cheeks had darkened. Shiro said something to him, and he looked to her paladin, but she caught him glance her way for half a tick. It was all so awkward.

 

–

 

Together, Allura and Lotor had thanked all the well wishers as they stood in what she could only assume was a room for mingling. Only a few tidbits were said between each other.

She was starting to wonder what could possibly be done so they could speak to one another like they had earlier during the Tar’Kasa ceremony. As if answering her, Lotor put his hand on her elbow.

“Princess, I had hoped we might have a few moments to speak.”

Allura forced a smile at him, “Of course.” She was mildly terrified.

Lotor began to lead her away. They walked down a long hallway without stopping, and she started to wonder where on earth he was taking her. Then after another dobosh, and turning a few corners, she asked, and he gave her a small grin.

“Since we have spoken at great length in _your_ chambers, I thought perhaps we could do the same in _mine_. For privacy and comfort,” he said, and her anxiety spiked a bit thinking about being alone with him.

“I see.”

Finally arriving, Allura was a bit overwhelmed. The doors were rather ornate. It was a very stark reminder of what she was marrying into.

“I apologize, Princess, Dayak insisted I keep rooms of my status, regardless of my feelings on the matter.”

She bit her lip as he led her through the doors when unlocked. They kept going, through another two sets of opulent doors, and another to the side. Entering a smaller, more comfortable room, he led her to a small sofa.

“Would you like something perhaps to drink?”

She shook her head, and he sat next to her, so close their thighs touched. The silence was awkward. Allura realized she was merely staring at her hands when Lotor reached across and touch her fingers. Uncurling her closest hand, she watched as he cautiously slid his under hers and grasped her palm.

Taking a few shaky breaths, she slowly looked up at him. His expression was a bit gloomy, but he was watching her with bright eyes.

“Lotor….”

“Princess… I…,”

“Please, you don’t need to use my title. I had hoped we wouldn’t be so formal, not when it’s just the two of us.”

A small smile formed on his lips.

“If that is what you wish, Allura.”

“It is. I also want to thank you for the dinner. It was a great relief to have everything out, especially with Dayak keeping my paladins in line.”

His smile grew larger.

“I am glad everything met with your approval. Kolivan certainly assisted to make sure you understood the full implications of… everything, from what I heard.”

Her face felt hot. “Yes, I… hadn’t realized I had inadvertently indicated unintended… uh, situations, but I am very glad I did so. I knew that I would be displa-”

Allura stopped speaking as Lotor moved his other hand to her neck. His fingers delicately and slowly traced the outline of the mark.

“We both know the situation hadn’t been quite what everyone thought.”

“Y-yes, but they’re not entirely wrong. It was something done while we were… whether it was on a physical plane or not is not really important.”

“I did it in anger, Allura, that’s unacceptable.”

She placed her free hand on top of his on her neck, and kept their eyes locked.

“If we are to discuss who harmed who worse in anger, than there is no question of the answer. When you bit me, your consciousness was lost in whatever plane of existence is outside of this one, I do not blame you for what you did there. It was certainly not a deliberate choice, not like mine.” She looked down and sighed. “I already mentioned it was what spurred me to go back and get you. I do not regret that at all. It gives me much concern over what might have occurred if I had left you like that. I dislike every possibility that could have brought about. And…,” she looked back up at him, “and when it comes down to it, Lotor, you had left your own body, and in great distress you sought me out. Whether in anger or not, you still came to _me_ for some form of comfort or attachment to the physical plane. That you still remember what happened in my dream indicates you are whole once more, and that is a great relief. I was worried you might have been partially lost to the emptiness of space.”

Lotor’s expression was sad, but he leaned in close to her. She instinctively began to lower her eyelids. Before their lips touched, he whispered to her.

“I am glad I can always find my way to you, no matter what lifetime or plane of existence either of us is in.”

Her eyes began brimming with tears, but Lotor didn’t give her a chance to respond before he kissed her. Their hands in her lap parted, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. Their light pecks moved from short and sweet, to him deepening the kissing as he grasped at her thighs to pull her up onto his lap.

When Allura gripped fingers in his hair, he moved his head back to look at her. She smiled at him.

Lotor kept her gaze as he began to pull her skirts up. When his hand touched her bare leg and began to roam up past her knee, she realized she had forgotten to breathe. And that she hadn’t worn anything under the dress. His hand continued up her thigh to just below her hip, and she could tell the moment he also realized. The grin that spread across his face gave her a thrill in her stomach.

He leaned forward to kiss her, gliding his tongue along hers as he started to run his fingers across her skin. Taking a bold step, Allura moved her other leg to bend and be across his lap. He made a small groan into her mouth at her action as he pushed his thumb between her now spread legs.

He touched her delicately at first, but when she made a few deep breaths in reaction to what he was doing, Lotor increased the pace of his rubbing. She moaned. His fingers moved, and he slid them around before pushing them inside her, one by one. After several thrusts of his hand, he left them still inside her.

Lotor kept moving his thumb in a circular motion, and she clung to his shoulders. Kissing along her jaw and down her neck, he found himself back to where the bite mark was. She could feel his hand working her into a building heat, and she was breathing heavy.

“Allura… I’m remiss that I can’t quite remember when I gave you this mark, even after you had it out on display for my entire empire. I find myself wanting to give you a new one that I can remember for all to see.”

“No,” she breathed heavy, “not now. Do that when you’re inside me.”

He groaned in response and moved his thumb faster, and she came undone. Clutching his shoulders, he kissed her on the neck as she turned into a puddle in his arms.

Lotor gently set her back into the cushions, his hand resting on her thigh, as she struggled to regain her breath. He pushed her skirts back and hovered over her, on his knees and looking down. He looked as if he was about to say something, but he didn’t. Instead, he ripped off most of his armor and gloves before lowering himself down on top of her.

While he had his tongue in her mouth, she felt a smooth caressing at her entrance. Then there was a pressure as she felt him sliding inside her. She wasn’t sure she would ever be used to how much he pushed her apart.

He brought both of his hands up and grasped her wrists, pushing them into the cushions on either side of her head. Looking down, he frowned at her before he thrust deeply. It felt good at first, but then he kept being rougher about it. His expression turned into a more serious, angry one, his lip nearly with a snarl, and his grip on her wrists was almost painful. Allura was growing concerned.

And then after less than a dobosh he slowed. Closing his eyes briefly, he stopped moving. When he looked at her again, his expression was full of sadness.

“I apologize, Allura. I found myself becoming angry all over again and taking it out on you. It won’t happen again.”

“Oh. I… don’t dislike you being a bit more… forceful.” She watched as his eyebrows raised. “Maybe not quite so much but… well, I did declare I would ‘bend to your will,’ did I not?”

“Allura….”

She smiled sweetly. “I believe I made a very public admission of submission to you, perhaps you would like to-”

“Absolutely not, I never intend to control you or force myself on you.”

She laughed a breezy, happy laugh. It felt like it had been so long since she had.

“No, I dare say neither of us would tolerate that for long. But I intended to say perhaps more continuing... right now.”

The look of lust he gave her paled to any he had given her before, and she felt him twitch inside her. Moving her wrists up, he grasped them both in one of his large hands over her head and ran his other down her arm.

“Are you saying you want me to hold you down and have my way with you, Allura?”

“Hmm... _maybe_ I would not mind if my prince of the Galra held me down and had his way with me,” she said giggling.

Lotor closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he looked down at her again, moving his face closer to hers.

“Perhaps I shall,” he whispered and kissed her. He didn’t wait more than a moment before he pulled himself out of her and drove back in. He wasn’t being rough, but he wasn’t being overly gentle, either.

Ending the deep kisses, Lotor ran the tip of his nose down to her neck while he rocked her body with his thrusts. He was making a deep humming noise, and coupled with the continual plungingat just the right angle, she felt like she would explode.

With his free hand, he pulled at the top of her gown, pulling one of her breasts free. He pawed at her, and she gasped when she felt the soft, slippery pressure of his tongue on her skin. He wound it around her nipplebriefly before he simply began sucking and licking.

Allura knew she was breathing hard, but when he started to nip at her, she heard moans come out of her mouth that would otherwise have made her blush. It all was sending a spark of pleasure through her body. He left a wet trail on her skin as he moved back up to her neck, kissing and tonguing at the healing bite mark.

“Do it, Lotor,” she managed to get out with a raspy voice.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” she breathed, “I want it to be what everyone assumes.”

He didn’t waste any time. It hurt when he bit down and his teeth recut the marks, but it wasn’t as deep as before, not at all like his anger in the dream. Allura tried to deny it, but the pain stirred a heady lust in her.

His hand was running down her side, and then he gripped her knee, pushing her thigh up and spreading her legs farther. That angle made her moan. His splayed fingers then slid slowly down the inside of her thigh.Before she could even consider what he was doing, his thumb was back rubbingright above where he was pounding away at her. That renewed sensation, coupled with his next pushes inside of her, had her digging her nails into his hand holding her wrists as she let out a loud mewling sound of pleasure.

The noise she made clearly had an effect on Lotor. He was attempting and failing at kissing her neck as he rammed harder into her. As she was coming down off her orgasm, he moved his hand to grasp at her hip. It was only a few ticks before he was grunting something she didn’t understand as she felt him twitching inside her again with each thrust, this time coupled with a warm sensation.

Lotor slowed to a stop. His grip on her wrists and hip lessened before he completely collapsed on top of her. Allura tangled her hands in his hair, kissing at his ear, all while whispering sweet things to him. After a few ticks, he slid his hands under her and hugged her tightly.

“Lotor?”

“Mmm?”

“That was worth at least five shards of my claelur.”

He laughed against her and pulled back slightly. Smiling, he kissed her softly.


	6. The Bare Truth

Allura was hugging the sheets to herself as she lay in Lotor’s bed. She watched him as he hung her dress in a large closet that disappeared as the door closed behind him.

“Pri-Allura, are you sure you don’t wish for something temporary to wear?”

“No, it’s fine. If you are worried, you could join me like this.”

She watched with a smug satisfaction as his eyes widened.

“Why do I feel as though I am being tested?”

Allura laughed into her hand before she rolled onto her side facing away from him, making sure the sheet barely draped across her side, and left her whole back exposed. She nearly laughed again, ruining the whole illusion she had intended to make, when she heard him take in a deep breath.

“Allura….”

She couldn’t help herself and giggled. The bed shifted with his weight as he climbed onto it. Then his hand was on her shoulder, and running down her side before gripping her bare hip under the sheet.

“You are making it very hard to stay upset with you, all things considered,” he whispered so close to her she could feel his breath across her skin.

She turned her head to look up at him.

“Would you have preferred to still be angry?”

Lotor frowned and looked down and away from her gaze.

“No, I am just… unaccustomed to….” He took a breath and sighed. “...enjoying anyone else’s company. Or caring, really.”

His words were like a knife to the heart. Allura realized it would probably take some time before she would stop associating his mentioning happiness with how she had harmed him.

Turning slightly, she brought her arm from under her side and lifted his hand from her hip. Pushing her fingers between his before rolling back to face him, she smiled gently up at him. Allura squeezed until he looked back to her.

“Lotor… I hope that… that is….” She frowned. Dwelling would not help when he was clearly trying. “Let’s not force anything, then,” she said squeezing his hand again.

“I’m not entirely sure that is the answer either, Allura,” he said and he slid himself down under the sheets and against her. They looked at one another for a full dobosh before he moved himself down a little more and pushed his cheek against her shoulder. Shifting her arm a little, she was able to put her hand on his head and stroke his hair.

“We need to have the ceremony,” he murmured against her skin. “The alliance will be as shaky as before until that occurs.”

“I believe your empire is the more concerned party on tradition in this instance, so whatever you think is best we’ll do.”

He hesitated before he spoke.

“I… had hoped to have some Altean traditions, as I don’t know many of them. But it is your choice, Allura. Is a movement too soon for you?”

She found herself blinking into space. “I supposed it is not. We do need to strengthen our position sooner over later, I don’t have any reason to argue over it happening so soon....”

He pulled his head back to look up at her.

“If you need more time-”

“No, that is plenty. I would like to break the star…,” she said looking away from him as she continued to stroke his hair.

Allura could hear the smile in his voice when he spoke as she stared at the wall in his bedroom. “I would like that as well.”

She felt flushed, and looked down at him. Lotor’s expression was very soft, matched by his voice as he spoke again, and her heart melted.

“I appreciate the effort you are putting forth, Allura, and I hope you are able to continue to do so. Things will not be easy. This coming movement especially, there’s much that needs to be done. I regrettably have been… putting some things off of late.”

That Lotor had been shirking on his obligations was nothing short of shocking. “Is there anything expected of me, before the wedding?”

His grin turned devious. “There’s another tradition before the ceremony itself, but I need to prep some things first.”

Allura did not like the sound of that.

 

–

 

The princess woke with a start. It took her a tick to remember she was still aboard the Galra cruiser in Lotor’s bed. It was dim in the room, and she was confused why she had woken. She was still so tired. Then she heard whimpering.

Lotor was wrapped in her arms, head against her chest, trembling. She touched his cheek, and she tried not to jump when he yelped as if in pain.

“Lotor?”

Lifting his head, recognition filled his eyes, and then fear. He began rambling incoherently as he shoved her away from him and into the pillows, as he scrambled off the bed. She watched, terrified, as his expression changed from fear to anger. He was hunched over, his bare chest heaving. His breathing was so heavy he was nearly snarling.

Allura kept her eyes locked with his, and shifted on the bed, moving closer to him. He backed up farther away from her at every movement she made in his direction.

“Lotor, please, what’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong? You _betrayed me_ and left me to them and dare to ask me what’s wrong?! You know what’s wrong, _Princess._ ”

Allura realized he had to be still half asleep.

“Who? Who did I leave you to?” she pleaded as softly as she could manage.

“Those... things. The ones that took my parents.”

Her breath caught in her throat. He had been in the quintessence field for nearly a whole quintant. Did it do something more to him than she had realized?

Holding out her arms, she spoke softly. “Please, come here, I won’t let them hurt you any more. I’ll protect you, Lotor.”

She watched as his expression eased. He was still for a tick, staring at the floor. When he looked up at her with wide, sad eyes, she gestured her hands towards herself. He looked back down, even as his breathing starting to ease up.

“Lotor, please, I swear nothing from there will harm you again.”

His eyes shot up to her. “They only hurt me because _you did_. _**You**_ are not to be trusted.”

Allura’s arms started to shake. She thought they had made such progress, but if this is how he felt half asleep… she bit her lip.

“I apologize for not listening and for abandoning you. I should have gone back for you immediately. I will never again do something so childish and unfeeling. Please, let us ward those creatures off, together. I will not let anything harm my husband.”

His eyebrows upturned and quivered. Lotor nearly tripped over himself as he moved back towards her, back on the bed. Launching himself into her open arms, he knocked her back into the pillows. Face buried into her shoulder, she felt him begin to sob as she wrapped her arms around his wide shoulders to hold him against her.

Caressing his hair and back, she let her own tears run down her cheeks as she listened to him cry. He had been so strong, and so alone, for so many deca-phoebs, and she had managed to cause him so much distress in so short of a time. She was determined to regain all of his trust.

Eventually he calmed, and his breathing eased. She was convinced he had fallen asleep, but then he spoke, lightly startling her.

“I suppose it’s not terrible if my Empress holds me as I... let out emotions.”

She leaned her cheek onto his head and smiled. “No, it’s not terrible at all. You can let me know anything you wish, and all of your sad thoughts… and I will do nothing more than think better of you for it.”

He made a whining groan she had never heard of out him. She could only assume that was a sound of… approval?

Lotor pulled back and looked up at her. She continued to smile. He looked away briefly as he spoke.

“I keep having terrible dreams. I barely slept all movement.”

She tried to keep her expression positive. “Well then, I will have to give you something more pleasant to dream about.”

His eyes shot up to look at her, and her grin turned into a genuinely happy smile. He shifted himself to be closer to her, and pressed his lips against hers. What started as a long, chaste kiss, turned into a passionate one as he pushed her mouth open. He slipped his tongue against hers, and she responded in kind.

Moving his hands to push her shoulders back into the bed, Lotor leaned back to look at her again. Allura reached up to touch his cheek. Closing his eyes again, he titled his head into her hand.

Seeing him like this, she really started to wonder again how she had ever doubted him. He was half-Altean, and she had distrust in him because… he was half-Galran. She took a breath to try and calm herself. He heard her, and opened his eyes. His face split into a grin, and the lusty look made her feel a little bit scared. Leaning down, he pushed her chin back with his nose, and ran his tongue along her throat, leaving a hot, wet trail.

Allura let out that deep breath in almost a moan. They had talked a bit since he’d taken her on the cramped sofa, but it really didn’t seem to take much for a fire to be lit between them. She reached up and combed her hands through his hair. He made a low rumble in his chest, and she delighted in the sound. Stretching out her legs on either side of him, she leaned up to give him a few rushed pecks on the lips.

Looking down at her, he was breathing heavy again. She smiled, and ran a hand slowly down across his chest. He closed his eyes at her touch.

“I hope to never be parted from you again,” she whispered, still feeling like her words were too loud.

He had a slight grin on his lips as he looked up at her. His expression from that angle as his face was tilted down, with the arch of his brow, sent a thrill through her.

“I cannot guarantee that, Allura, but we can certainly make our time spent when we are together pleasant enough to comfort us until we are with one another again.”

She was fighting with herself on whether to cry or rip Lotor’s pants off. She decided on the latter. Digging her fingers into his back, she pushed him flush against her. He licked her ear lobe, and she giggled. He sat back up again and gave her a smirk. Pulling both her legs back up by the back of her knees, and before she knew what was happening, he had flipped her onto her stomach. Knees bent and under her, it pushed her rear against his stomach.

The princess had never been particularly bashful about what mating entailed, but being on her knees and facing away from him was a bit beyond what she had ever done before. The whole thing was so very erotic. When he ran his hand down to her waist, and then back up her buttcheek, a heat and a lustfulness that bordered on the intense feelings from the quintessence field filled her veins.

Lotor whispered her name as he gripped both sides of her, spreading her apart. She felt like she would combust into flames.

“Is this okay?” he asked so softly she almost didn’t hear over the blood pounding in her ears.

“Y-yes, I believe… I like this, please continue.”

She heard him making a humming noise, and a rustling as he pulled down his pants. Her anticipation skyrocketed as she felt him brush a finger along the back of one of her legs. Then he slowly moved his other hand down towards her thigh. Pushing her legs a little more apart, she felt like the waiting was going to make her fall apart. Allura tried to breath, and it felt like an eternity before his fingers were gone and replaced with a smooth sensation of him rubbing his member against her in circular motions.

The slick sound was both embarrassing and made the blood rushing to her ears intensify. He slid farther down, and she made a small gasp at the touch. Her senses were still overly heightened there. Knowing it was his tip against her made her moan out as he made tiny motions concentrated to elicit pleasure from her. He continued this for a while, and she found herself gripping the bedding and her lip between her teeth as she felt nearly nothing else.

He whispered her name again, and she felt nearly undone. It was sending her into an easy climax, but before she could, he shifted himself up and slowly pushing himself inside of her. The angle of it made her moan again, and he softly chuckled. After a few ticks, he gripped her hip with both of his hands and pulled himself slightly out before driving himself back in with more force.

Repeating the action multiple times, he was pressing somewhere he had not in their previous lovemaking, and it was sending sparks into her vision with each thrust. Momentarily she was reminded of earlier when he had been rougher with her. Despite herself she nearly laughed. The Galra were a warrior-like race, and that always came with it a reputation for lusty and harsher treatment. She half wondered if that gave him a propensity for rough mating.

“Allura, do you like this?”

She couldn’t believe he was asking that straight out.

“Yes,” she managed to get out between labored breaths.

“What do you like about it?”

If her cheeks hadn’t already felt hot, she was positive they would have burst into flames. She swallowed and tried her best to make her mind function.

“I… I like the feeling of you inside me, Lotor. The way you’re… you’re hitting deep is… is…,” she considered how she felt and what he would want briefly before continuing. “Please, a bit harder would be nice.”

He laughed loudly and slammed himself against her, and she absolutely saw stars in her vision. It only took two more thrusts from him before she was uncontrollably shaking and moaning out his name as she felt herself tightening around him.

His fingers gripped her so hard, she was convinced he was leaving marks on her hip as she felt him pulse into her, pushing himself in as far as he could go. Almost immediately after, he leaned over and rested his head on her back, hands still holding her against him. She could feel his labored breathing against her sweaty skin as he struggled to catch his breath, and she attempted to not fall over from her own languid limbs under his weight.

“My beautiful Empress,” she heard him whisper against her as he kissed her now sweaty skin.

One of his fingers started to trail up her side. He moved his hand across her breast, and with very soft motions, grasped and massaged. His other hand joined the first, and she began to wonder if he planned on taking her again, or how long he planned on having her on her knees. His fingers rubbing at her nipples answered the question as she felt him starting to grow stiff again inside her, making her bite her lip.

Lotor moved a hand back down between her legs. The contact of his finger on her was delicate this time, barely touching her skin as he flicked until she was squirming under him. He made a throaty chuckle as she was worked up so much she began to push herself back against him.

He murmured something she couldn’t quite hear against her skin, and he started to leave a wet trail of kisses across her back. He removed his fingers from her as she began to push vigorously onto him. By now he was fully hard again, and Allura was amazed at the self control he was displaying in letting her do all the movements after he had just seemed completely uncontrollable. She was about to shift to give herself more leverage when he wrapped his arms around her, and pulled her up and into his lap as he laid onto his back. Her legs were adjusted to be under her as they had moved, and he was still inside her. She turned to look at him over her shoulder, and he smirked up at her from his position with half closed eyes. Reaching out, Lotor ran fingers down her lower back.

“You’re in control now, Princess,” he said in a gravely tone, sending spark shooting through her at the meaning.

She swallowed and turned back. She gripped his knees to give her support, and pulled herself a little up before pushing back down. It took a dobash for her to figure out herself, but once she did, she was convinced she would come undone in barely any time at all at the feeling of him filling her and pushing her apart at each thrust.

Rocking her hips, the space between them grew incredibly sticky. She pushed harder and harder down onto him as she moved, losing herself to ease out her own pleasure. Lotor began to breath as heavy as she was, and he ran his hands across her back repeatedly.

Gripping her hips again, he whispered her name. She made a soft sound in response, and he started to match her thrusts with his own. She’d worked them both up completely, and it only took a dobash more before he gripped her against him, making forceful thrusts up into her as he released hard inside.

The feeling had been so rough and quick at the end that she was so close. It took only a few ticks more after that with him not soft yet, and her body went hot as she pushed against him in her climax.

Allura realized she was gripping his knees, and slowly let go. Before she could move, he sat up and wrapped his arms around her, snuggling his face against her neck. Her heart felt as warm as her overheating skin at he mumbled how much she meant to him, and how beautiful she looked with sweat on her body from having been on top of him.

Allura closed her eyes, smiling to herself. After a few dobashes, they detangled their limbs from one another. She refreshed herself before returning to his bed. He was laid out, sheets half across his hips as he watched her walk across his bedroom completely naked.

“What a sight you are, my Empress. You could make the entire empire fall at your feet just like that.”

She giggled as she got onto the bed. Pulling the sheet up, she snuggled herself into his arms. He shifted closer to her, putting his hands around her shoulders, and she wiggled herself closer into his embrace. With her head against his chest, she could hear his heart beating wildly. She’d expected him to calm significantly, but it only increased.

“Lotor, are you all right?”

“Hmm, I am. But I must confess I have never held anyone in my arms in this fashion.”

Allura’s eyes opened instantly and she leaned back to look up at him.

“Truly? But... why?”

She watched his smile fade. “If I speak of this, I believe it will merely make the progress we have made strained. Please, don’t worry about it, my love.”

Her heart lurched and she wanted to cry, but she bit her lip to be strong.

“I suppose you will have to hold me often, and then you will have done so to the point where you forget you never had previously.”

She hoped that was the right thing to say to him, but when he kissed the top of her head, she knew it was.

 

–

 

Allura woke and immediately regretted it. She was sore in places she didn’t even know could be sore, and rolling onto her side made her sightly wince at a bruise on her hip from Lotor’s fingers. A small price to pay for the previous night...

Next to her was a small data pad. It had a soft, pulsating light blinking at her. Tapping the screen, a hologram appeared.

“Good waking, Allura. I hope you have rested well. I’m leaving you this message as I tried not to disturb you as I left, there was an urgent situation involving the Flame of Purification. To not keep you in the dark, they made a move on a weak point in a laxly guarded system, so I was needed on the bridge to direct. Do not be alarmed, but I did have to talk your paladins down from rushing to their aid. I assure you, the Lions and Voltron are entirely unnecessary in this situation. I sent for some of your clothes from your chambers, you will find them in the closet. Please, use this device to order a meal for us, and I will return as soon as I am able.”

She replayed it. His sincerity made her feel calm, and she realized for the first time since her childhood she felt like she could relax and let someone else handle the situation. _She could rely on him._ The same nagging feeling of her having hurt him and nearly missing out on his crept up into her heart before she forced herself to silence it. Lotor would not have done this for her to make her feel horrible over it.

Smacking her cheeks to focus, she sat up. After refreshing herself, she figured out how to open his closet. Stepping in, she blinked in shock. There were clothes everywhere, shelves full of identical armor, and even some different styles ones, all laid out. Grand coats, and a variety of things she had no names for. A section near the front was mostly empty, and hanging on it were several of her dresses, and on small shelves were her other things, including several pairs of shoes and boots. He had seen to everything.

She worried over her clothes as she put them on. Was it all nice enough for his Empress? An Empress-to-be? Allura sighed, she would have to have an entire wardrobe made to suit her new position.

Picking up the data pad again, she click through to find the way to order from the kitchens. She had expected the device to be an extra, unused one perhaps, but she realized it must have been one of his personal ones. There were sections full of schematics for ships, data banks on entire solar systems, and she realized, a whole section about Voltron. She forced herself to ignore that and managed to find the ordering system.

A handful of dobashes later, a servant arrived with a hovering cart. Covered dishes were spread around a table, along with a few decanters. Bowing, the servant exited, and Allura wondered if she should wait for Lotor.

Some time passed with her sitting and taking peaks under covers, sipping at some fruity drink in the other hand. She looked around the dishes on the table and a thought occurred to her. He _asked_ her to order food for them. She could easily poison it or do something terrible to harm him. She wondered if he realized how much he seemed to be trusting her... or if it was perhaps on purpose.

The door opened out of nowhere, and Lotor strode in. She was surprised by the warm expression he gave her, and it made her heart flutter a bit.

Allura learned about the dishes she had haphazardly chosen as they ate together, many of them not even Galra in origin. They spoke so easy with one another, that she wondered if perhaps their evening of lovemaking had healed his hurting spirit. The dream and her subsequent holding of him in her arms was clearly a pivotal moment in their relationship.

“I have changed one of the pre-ceremony traditions to something I think will suit us better as a couple. Many traditions focus on more Galran culture, and while I am not entirely against them all, some of it is wildly inappropriate for not only us, but our status. Instead, next we will be traveling, together. I must warn you, one part might be a bit… unsettling.”

“Unsettling… how?

“I have pieces of Altea.”

Allura’s stomach dropped and her limbs went numb. She knew Altea was gone, but to be faced with the reality of a chunk of it was just… almost too much to bear.

Lotor’s hand was over hers.

“Allura, I know this is difficult, but perhaps if I tell you why I have brought this to your attention, it might ease your heart.”

She looked up at him, barely able to see his face through the tears.

“We will go over what is in the ceremony and celebration today, so you can prepare… which the traveling will be gathering materials for. Before that, I need explain the reason for bringing up Altea. On the third day of festivities, we have to go through a trial of creation together. It is symbolic of our future as a couple, and this historically involves creating a cradle for potential children. I had hoped we could use alchemy to create one out of pieces of both Altea and Daibazaal.”

His hand gripped hers on the table as she began to shake. Tears began to stream down her cheeks unchecked. Lotor moved around the table to pull her into his arms and against his chest as she began to openly sob.

Allura cried for quite a while. He stroked her hair the whole time, and she gripped the fabric across his chest. When she was able to breath calmly, he pulled back and kneeled on the floor in front of her. He wiped her cheeks with his thumbs, which made her want to cry even harder.

“Are you going to be all right? I know this is hard.”

She managed to look at him and slightly smile. “To unite what remains of our planets to be a safe place for our children to sleep as they grow… Oh, Lotor, your parents would be so proud of the wonderful person you’ve become.”

His eyes went wide. Allura leaned in to tenderly kiss him. She realized he had begun to cry when she could taste his tears on her lips.


	7. Dressing Down

Allura looked at herself in the mirror over the sink in Lotor’s personal bathing chamber aboard the Galra flagship. She was glad he opted for so primitive a device for his personal use. The water not only reminded her of her Lion’s element, it was very refreshing to just splash her face after crying for so long… like a small pool of water.

Touching the markings on her cheek, she took a deep breath so she wouldn’t start crying again. Altea was so far and out of touch, but also forever with her.

“ _I have pieces of Altea.”_

…and it was forever with Lotor, in more than one way.

The princess closed her eyes, thinking about his purpose for the pieces. He had never told her about them. He had never told her about so many things. They would need to have many long, honest discussions, especially if they were going to avoid another situation like what occurred in the quintessence field from happening again.

Returning to the main chamber with a freshly dampened towel, Allura stood next to Lotor, seated on that small settee of his. When he glanced up at her, she smiled, and leaned down to dab around his eyes, focusing on where she knew his Altean marks lay hidden.

Removing the cloth, and looking at his calm face tilted upwards with his eyes closed, she once again could not believe her poor choices before this past week. He was trusting her completely after everything she had done, whether he realized it or not, just like he had before that terrible business in the rift.

“Lotor, would you like to go to my rooms tonight so I can show you all the data pads from my childhood? And other little tidbits I don’t believe you grew up knowing? There’s far more on my ship than my claelur. I have no doubts that Coran would quite enjoy talking your ears off telling you about the history of the Altean broadswords, since you seem to favor that type of weapon.”

His growing smile made her return it with one of her own, and a warm sensation flowed through her.

–

Back in her castle, Lotor stopped at an intersection of hallways. The royals were holding hands, and she looked up at him when he didn’t say anything.

“Is something the matter?”

“I… yes. Please, your neck. The healing pods are this way, correct?”

She swallowed and looked to the floor.

“To be quite honest, it’s… a visual reminder to me about what can happen if I don’t properly consider a situation. I would prefer to keep the... marks.”

He frowned, looking off and down another hallway, before biting his lip.

“I understand that, Allura, and I appreciate your need, but I believe you have failed to consider something else.”

She blinked at him, wondering what he was talking about. He wouldn’t look at her.

“Lotor?”

He finally glanced back. With pinched brows, he gave her an incredibly harrowing gaze.

“It is also a visual reminder of what I am capable of when full of rage, and while… not longer of this plane.”

Allura was the one to bite her lip now. She shifted closer to him, taking her hand out of his, and put both her palms against his cheeks. He looked concerned, but a softness that had been missing was creeping back in.

“I apologize, Lotor, I had been thoughtlessly not considering your view on the matter. I will heal them in the pod.” She took her hands off his face and moved to step towards the room where they were housed.

“Wait,” he started, lightly grabbing one of her wrists. “Please, I have a better idea.”

Allura watched him as he gathered his thoughts.

“I would like it if, perhaps… maybe, if it is possible, for me to… to heal you myself?”

Her eyes went wide and she considered his meaning. “I thought you did not know how?”

Lotor looked up at her and grinned sheepishly. “I had hoped you would teach me, Alchemist Allura.”

–

They sat on her bed, cross-legged and facing one another. Lotor had removed all the bulky parts of his armor, and his boots, and she had changed into a simpler outfit with pants, leaving her neck exposed. She smiled up at him, and he returned the expression.

“All right, first you must tell me if you have done anything at all related.”

“Unfortunately, I have not.”

“You mean to tell me you had all those Alteans under your care and you did not even ask them for instruction?”

“I never told them of my heritage, Allura.”

She blinked at him several times and tilted her head. “Whyever not?”

Lotor looked down before answering. “I preferred if they assumed I was merely a Galra who took pity on their persecuted race and had the power to do something about it. I was not prepared for the changes to the situation that such knowledge would have brought on.”

Squeezing his hands resting on his knees, Allura smiled at him again. “I understand. We’ll begin from where children usually do, and see how fast you pick up.”

She could have sworn he was pouting as she shifted his hands in hers.

“First, clear your mind. You must be as calm as possible. Do not think of anything at all.”

“You ask that of me, while holding onto my hands?”

She laughed, and slowly slid her palms from his.

“Breathe...”

After several dobashes, she broke the silence. “Do you feel calm?”

“I am not sure I will ever feel fully what one would consider ‘calm’ alone with you, on your bed, Allura, but it is possible I am doing as you wish.”

She laughed softly.

“All right, I will give you that. Keeping focused, reach out into yourself. Feel your own quintessence. Embrace it, as if you are hugging it. Let it envelop you….”

She kept giving him encouraging words, and opened her eyes. She watched as the faint violet glow began to form on his cheeks.

“How do you feel, Lotor?”

“Mmmm, warm, I suppose. But also a bit cool.”

“You have completed the first step successfully,” she said with pride, as the glow solidified into his fully, pointed markings.

Slowly, Lotor opened his eyes. Looking down at his cheeks briefly, he tried to keep himself from smiling, before his eyes shot to hers. She was beaming at him, and he couldn’t control himself anymore and returned the look, much like a child would on their first successful attempt.

Allura reached out and grasped his hands in hers once more.

“Close your eyes again, my prince.”

He laughed softly. “I believe I am an emperor now, Princess Allura.”

“Hm, true, but you will always be my Galra prince.”

“I am the _only_ Galra prince.”

“For now, I suppose.”

Lotor’s hands tightened on hers.

“Allura… what are you implying?”

Opening her eyes, she tried to keep her look neutral on such a topic. “Eventually, we will have many princes of our own, as well as princesses. While normally I am capable of… preventing myself from possibly conceiving in much the same way I can change my general form, I had quite forgotten in the quintessence field. Ever since, I have purposefully been not. It is within the realm of possibility that I will very soon be moving forward with bearing your royal heir.”

Lotor’s eyes went wide and his markings faded as his concentration faltered. His fingers began to shake, and she squeezed them.

“Do you need a few moments?”

He looked down at their hands gripping one another. When he spoke, his voice was low and cracking. “I’ve never considered a family of my own. I was so concerned with never having any liabilities, and not trusting anyone, that it just….” He looked up at her.

Allura smiled as her eyes teared up. Leaning forward, she gave him a tender kiss on his cheek, and her voice was soft as she spoke against his skin. “It’s safe now, Lotor. You can relax, and you can have a whole ship’s worth of little royal babes if you so desire.”

He hummed lightheartedly, and kissed her cheek back. “I would like that, my love.”

Sitting back, she looked up at him. They stared into one another’s eyes for a dobash, before he suddenly wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him.

Lotor held her for what felt like an eternity, and she really did not want to be anywhere else, wrapping her arms around his waist.

“I’m not sure you can focus on healing like this, my _emperor_.”

She felt him softly chuckle and start to run his hand along her back. “That can wait a little longer.”

–

Keith knew this had been coming for a while. Shiro had been working on himself and ignoring the obvious, but now he was a lot better, and handing him a detailed report from Kolivan was the thing that finally made him decided to have the long awaited conversation. He tried not to visibly gulp. Shiro was holding it in, but he could tell the man was pissed.

“Shiro, I know you said to… always keep a cool head. I’m sorry, I just….”

He watched as his mentor went to fold his arm across his chest, but lacking the other one was clearly irritating his habit. He instead put his hand on his hip.

“You messed up, Keith. If I wasn’t for Allura making a stand and having the power to heal Lotor, the situation would be really, _really_ bad. I want you to make me a list of what was at stake.”

Looking at the floor, Keith tried to remember to breath.

“Right now, Keith. This is not going to even begin to compare to what you’re going to have to endure with the Emperor.” His eyes shot up to Shiro’s. “Well, he might leave this mostly in my hands, but we are still going to be having a serious discussion with you about everything that has gone down. I know you’re not keen on leading, you made that very clear to me, but none of us really made a choice to be out here in this conflict, now did we? Princess Allura never made any of these choices, and she’s had to spearhead an entire resistance. I’m sure she would love to go back to a home she no longer has and not worry about any of it. She can’t do that, just like how she can’t pilot Voltron alone, she _needs_ you, Keith.”

“But what about you? You’re back, _you_ don’t need me in Black anymore.”

He watched as Shiro frowned at him. “ _That_ is not our current discussion. I want the list, _**now.**_ ”

Keith sighed and started listing everything that he had done wrong or miscalculated, focusing on the last parts; his lack of thorough investigation into what the Alteans were there for, going off the word of only one civilian, and the ramifications of taking out the sole leader of a large empire who was freshly in their reign.

“Princess Allura was also not correct in how she handled Emperor Lotor, Keith, and it’s clear they’ve discussed that. If your superior officer, or in this case, royalty you are serving under, does something that will have dire consequences, what should you have done instead of letting your emotions get the better of you?”

Keith stared at the ground for a moment, before looking up to meet Shiro’s eyes to answer him. “I should have respectfully and calmly spoken to her about the consequences of attacking an ally. _‘A soldier is not held accountable for disobeying a direct order if it has morally repugnant consequences,’_ was something I remember us being forced to memorize at the Garrison at one point….”

“Yes, that is something the incoming trainees learn, but even beyond that, Keith. You knew it was wrong, you needed to take a stand.”

He couldn’t look Shiro in the eye any longer as he listened to him continue.

“I’m well aware you were also determined to bring him out before the team had to leave because of the quintessence, and I’m proud of you for supporting her choice to go back for him.”

Keith’s eyes shot back up. “I… I guess.”

Shiro grinned at him. “In addition, you proved yourself capable of understanding this when you attempted to prevent the destruction at the Kral Zera. I believe _that_ choice and the direct action of saving the Emperor’s life at that time has spoken favorably of you. He will not have forgotten it, even with the situation in the quintessence rift.” He paused, and Keith bit the inside of his lip. “We might not be forced to adhere to Earth laws out here, but there’s no reason to give up our morals. It’s a standard back home for a reason, throughout many of our human cultures, and we need to keep that in mind as we interact further with so many other races and species.”

He paused, and placed his hand on Keith’s shoulder. “The Emperor would like to speak to both of us tomorrow, with Princess Allura. I suggest you get some rest, and make a list of things to touch on at this meeting… and make sure it starts with an apology. I can tell you don’t like what you did and the outcome, so make sure you focus on how much you’ve learned and why, all right, Keith?”

Giving Shiro a hesitant smile, he nodded, and his voice cracked. “Yeah, sounds good. Thank you, Shiro.”

The older man kept grinning at him, and his hand slid down off his shoulder as he pulled him in for a brief hug.

When Keith walked out into the hall way alone, his mind was completely jumbled. He didn’t even realize he wasn’t still by himself until he slammed into someone.

“Hey! Keith! Man, what the hell?” was what Lance nearly yelled at him, dropping a full container of what had to be a milkshake. It hit the ground, managing to land on the flat bottom and standing up, but still splattering both of them.

Whatever expression was on Keith’s face, Lance’s anger seemed to melt away and his tone went serious.

“Is everything okay? Nobody else has died, have they?”

Keith glanced up at him for a second before looking back at the pooling mess of cream at their feet. “No, nobody has died.” He pushed past Lance and kept walking.

“What is your problem?! You didn’t even apologize for knocking that everywhere!”

Keith stopped and turned, glaring at him. “Stop only thinking about yourself, Lance.”

“Myself! You’re the one spacing out in the hallway!” Lance was about to say something else but paused and looked back to where Keith had just come from. “Oh. You just got a dressing down from Shiro, didn’t you.”

Keith’s jaw flexed in extreme irritation, but instead of barking out a retort, he tuned on his heel to stalk away. He ignored Lance yelling something at him, and went to find anything to clean that stuff off his boots.

Five minutes later, rag in hand as he tried to get the bits of milkshake from the stitching in the leather, he heard Lance enter the same room.

“You’re never going to get it out without it wet.”

He looked up to glare at the other man, but his expression faded when he was handed a clear cup of water. Keith was just tired of dealing with everything, so instead of arguing, he took it and murmured a thanks.

They sat in silence for a while, dipping cloth into the water, both making sure nothing was left on their footwear. Lance was the first to speak.

“So what’d he say?”

Keith could feel himself bristling, but stayed calm, Shiro’s words echoing in his head.

“ _...what should you have done instead of letting your emotions get the better of you?”_

“That I fucked up. That we all fucked up. It shouldn’t have mattered how much whining you were doing, when Voltron is formed, it becomes _my_ mission and _my_ responsibility, and I need to handle myself better.” He stopped talking when he realized how much he really was saying to Lance.

Lance’s voice was small and wary. “We all decided together...”

Keith looked up at him and threw the rag down hard onto the floor next to his boot between them.

“THAT DOESN’T MATTER!”

Lance flinching made him take a deep breath before speaking again in a calmer manner.

“It doesn’t matter, Lance. Allura was too upset. We all were, but I knew what we were doing to Lotor was wrong. We broke so many of our own laws in what we did. Lotor wasn’t hostile until Allura wouldn’t stop pushing him, just for the fact he’s Galran. _**I’m**_ Galran, and I let her use that as an excuse to harm him… a foreign leader! We completely broke the Humanitarian Law of Armed Conflicts, Lance. I know that’s only on Earth, but what’s the point to it if we only apply it to humans? Don’t you even feel bad about this?”

He was getting angry again, but this time it was at himself. Before Lance answered him, Keith closed his eyes and put his hands over his face. He was gripping his fingers so hard he was digging into his skin.

“I’m not even sure what to feel anymore. I’m kinda numb about a lot of it. We never have debriefings…,” Lance said in a low voice next to him.

Keith slid his hands down off his face. That really was the core of the problem; why they always reacted with emotions, never knowing how anyone was going to handle anything, even in their own team. They didn’t even have any standard protocol.

“You’re right. We’ve been doing a lot of things wrong. No wonder we have been near failing so often. I should have been doing all this as leader.”

He looked at Lance when he felt his paladin’s hand on his shoulder.

“I know you were arguing with Shiro about being in charge before… I mean… I get that you maybe didn’t know. None of us were trained for any of this. That situation was pretty messed up. Everything with Shiro or that clone or whatever, attacking us and then… man, how did Lotor’s generals even get in the castle?”

Keith frowned. Nobody had even looked into that.

Lance removed his hand, and began to rub at his shoe again with the cloth. “That whole situation was too much. And then Allura just… I can’t believe she’s marrying him. She was pissed enough to… and now she’s just… ugh.”

Looking at Lance, Keith wondered how hard the news was really affecting him. Neither of them spoke for a while.

“Lance...”

His paladin looked up at him. It was pretty obvious he wasn’t taking the upcoming royal nuptials well.

“I know you like her, but she’s making her own choice.”

Lance looked away and back at his shoe, leaning onto his bent leg.

“I know.”

A thought was creeping up on Keith; they needed to have to have a meeting. Just the paladins. Just the ones from Earth. Many things needed to be discussed as a group. It wasn’t Keith’s natural way to deal with things, but it was becoming clear he needed to start doing things differently. It was really not working for the team as a whole if that’s how they had reacted and acted against Lotor. He started wondering if Matt was able to come talk with them, he would know so much intel and have insights they just didn’t...

–

That night, Allura was asleep and wrapped in Lotor’s arms, both of their cheeks glowing faintly from all their alchemy practicing. This time, she was the one to have a terrifying nightmare about the quintessence field….


	8. Of the Past and of the Future

It was dark. She felt it shouldn’t be dark. Reaching out her hands, they hit something… no, it was someone. They turned, and the light came to her eyes.

_Zarkon._

Her heart hammered in her chest, terrified. As her eyes adjusted to the light, she realized he wasn’t the now deceased Galra Emperor the last time she had seen him; he was younger, untainted. His eyes were not glowing, and wasn’t looking at her. He was looking _beyond_ her.

Allura felt like she was floating. She hard a hard time turning, but when she did, she could see where she was. The rift in the dimensions. They were _inside_ the quintessence field.

She spun back around, and realized Zarkon was holding someone. She moved closer to see, since he was blocking the view. Allura couldn’t move. She felt like arms were holding her in place. It took her a few moments, but she managed to force herself to get a little bit closer. Beyond Zarkon’s large arm, Allura could see ashy hair and dark skin. The person’s head lolled over as the emperor shifted himself, and Allura could see the lines down her face. It was Honerva… and she wasn’t moving.

The princess’s heart was in turmoil. What was she seeing? Where was she? _When_ was she? Her thoughts went silent as she watched Zarkon start yelling something she couldn’t understand as he shook the unmoving empress. His voice was muffled. She tried to move closer. Something was happening, she wanted to help. She _always_ wanted to help.

A piercing shriek filled her thoughts. She first assumed it was from Honerva, but it wasn’t. It was from above them. What was above?

Another shriek immediately after, this one closer, and Allura looked to her left. A large, black mass was that way. It had no mouth, but she could hear it in her head. It was moving towards them. She wanted to scream. She turned back to the couple, wanting to tell him about the black creature, but he already saw it.

Zarkon yelled, and while she didn’t hear his words, she could feel his pleading for them to stay away.

Allura reached out to touch him, she was close enough, but her hand went right through him. She wanted to cry. What was she seeing? _Why?_

Her hair stood on its end as another back creature flew past her. The screeching in her head made her vision go spotty and a headache begin to form. She screamed.

Zarkon’s head snapped in her direction, but he was looking around. Somehow, it seemed like he had heard her. Allura forced herself forward with all her might, and managed to move closer. Now she could see better. Honerva looked very sickly. Her heart lurched as she realized the empress was also heavily pregnant. _Lotor._

Reaching out her hands, she felt another creature whip past her. When it went through her arm, she felt a searing pain. She tried not to scream again, and kept her hands moving forward. Placing them over where Honerva’s forehead was, Allura reached out into the quintessence.

She could feel her presence, so very slightly. The empress was barely there. If they hadn’t been in the rift, she would already be dead. Allura’s eyes blurred as she pushed herself to the process of healing Honerva. Maybe she could change something for the better if she just tried...

It only took a tick before the woman gasped, and then the empress’s own markings glowed. Her hands came up like claws, and she gripped them into fists over her chest as she brought the raw quintessence into herself. She looked as if she were yelling, and she looked straight into Allura’s eyes.

Placing a hand on her belly, her whole body started to glow. A great relief filled the princess, but it was short lived. Another creature screeched to her right, and Allura looked over. The use of alchemy had attracted more, and there was many of them, swirling around the group like sharks about to strike for the kill. She turned to try and warn the couple, but it was too late.

A black creature swooped down and grabbed at Honerva, pulling something dark colored half out of her. Before it could take whatever it was, it snapped back as the creature kept moving. She watched the empress writhe in agony, alchemy forgotten. Another one swooped in and did the same. And a third. By the fourth, it aimed for her abdomen, and Allura watched in horror as a silvery substance was half pulled from her pregnant belly. It was glowing bright.

Zarkon raked his hand across the space where the creature was, and it dropped the glowing thing, snapping it back into Honerva. Allura then realized what it was; Lotor’s spirit. The prince’s very quintessence and literal being.

Allura brought outside quintessence into her self to try and use it as a weapon. She could feel her body start to overheat, but she couldn’t stop now. She had to help them. Flailing her arms, she managed to keep several of the creatures at bay with her glowing fists. But it wasn’t enough. She looked back over her shoulder at the family in time to see a creature pulling at Honerva’s spirit while another pulled at her unborn child. Zarkon hit at it, but another creature came up and wrapped around his neck, pulling him backwards. Allura screamed and tried to pull it off him, but her fingers only passed through them all, like a ghost.

She could hear Honerva’s howl of agony in her head. Zarkon managed to grasp one of the creatures with his hand, the one that was harming his wife. She was yelling, and while Allura couldn’t hear her, she could still understand what her lips were saying; “save our son!”

Through teary eyes, she watched as Zarkon let go of the creature above Honerva’s head, and claw at the one on her belly. It screeched and zoomed away. The emperor turned back to his wife but it was too late. There was a visible tearing, and one of the creatures made off with nearly all of Honerva’s spirit.

Allura screamed. She started to try and chase it, but she couldn’t get her limbs to work. She was feeling unable to move again, her feet feeling constricted. She watched as Honerva’s soul morphed and became darker the farther it got from it’s original host, turning nearly identical to the black entities circling around them.

Zarkon was yelling in her head. Allura looked back to see part of his soul was being torn from his body, too. Allura smacked at it, but it was undeterred as her hand passed through, even glowing with the quintessence. She watched in horror as a large chunk of his spirit was ripped from his body, and pulled into the swirling mass of the creatures.

The emperor hissed, and pulled Honerva close to him. He was yelling something she couldn’t hear again, and his eyes started to slightly darken. Allura tried to move closer to help, but she started to feel fuzzy. She could hear her name, and was feeling warmer. She pulled more quintessence into herself. She tried to move, but she heard Lotor yelling her name in her ear and she felt like she was being shaken.

 

The princess tried to sit up into her dimmed room with a start. She could only somewhat move, as she was being held in Lotor’s arms. Tears were streaming down her face, and she could see herself glowing. He was looking down at her, expression serious and concerned.

“I saw them die!” she managed to wail out before he said anything to her. She buried her face into his chest, her link with the quintessence fading out.

Allura cried into his embrace, gripping his arms for a long while. She realized he was murmuring to her, telling her she was safe and it would be okay. When she calmed down significantly, the words became clear... they were identical to the ones she had said to him the night before.

Taking a deep breath, she pulled back, his grip on her loosening. She smiled up at him, her eyes filling with tears again. Lotor reached up and wiped them from the tops of her cheeks, right over her Altean markings.

“Are you feeling better, now?”

“Yes, thank you. I apologize, I just… it was an awful dream.” She paused, her gaze moving to his shoulder. “I actually don’t know if it was a dream, or if I really saw them.” Looking back up to him, she tried to breath and not hyperventilate.

“Who?”

“It… it was your parents. I… it was in the rift. It had to have been so long ago, before the changes. Before they… I tried to help them but those black creatures, there was too many. They… Lotor they took your parents’ spirits. They didn’t die outright, but….”

Allura took a deep breath before continuing.

“Lotor, Honerva was with child... I think I saw what happened before you were born. She sacrificed herself for you. She _made_ Zarkon give up on her to protect you.” She watched as a myriad of emotions played on his face.

He pulled her close to him again, and she realized he was holding her like she was the last thing he had in the entire universe. It was few dobashes before he spoke again, his voice hoarse.

“Are you sure?”

She sighed against him. “It felt so real, I do not even know.”

When he didn’t say anything again right away, she could practically feel him thinking.

“What were they, _we_ , in?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? That is not possible in deep space, even within the quintessence field.”

“I do not know…,” she whispered, “that is all I saw.”

They didn’t speak for a long time. Lotor was rubbing his hand across her back, and she closed her eyes, calming into his arms and nearly dozing. Even if the dream had been real, she wasn’t in the past any longer. Lotor was with her here, alive. The more she thought about it, the more she couldn’t hold either of them responsible for what did or did not happen to the emperor and empress so many deca-phoebs ago, or all the turmoil that started the entire unrest and war. It was all so removed from them and what they had ever done. She idly wondered if perhaps her actions in the dream had truly saved the unborn Lotor.

When she felt him lean his head onto the top of hers, she made a soft humming noise at him, which he returned. She had calmed a great deal, and now, being held by him like this? Her heart felt like it was melting. For him to comfort her over this after all that had happened… it made her appreciate him and his sincerity all the more.

“Do you wish to sleep more, my empress?” he asked softly.

Allura pulled back to look at him. “I do not believe I can truly rest for a while again, at least not right away.”

Smiling, he leaned over to kiss her forehead. “Well then, I can think of something else we could do.”

She gasped, and he laughed.

“I did not mean it quite like that, Allura. Perhaps some books, or datapads, or many other things. Or I could take your nightgown off and kiss you all over. Whichever will make you feel better, my love.”

The tender way he spoke made her heart race. “Perhaps we could do several… things,” she said and reached up to run a finger along his ear. Lotor grinned at her before leaning in for a soft kiss.

 

–

 

Allura woke feeling warm. She wanted to laugh as she snuggled into Lotor’s arms. He kept clinging to her, and she wondered if he was still worried about a relapse in her judgment, or something terrible happening.

She made a tired groan, and tilted her head up to look at him. He gripped her back tighter and gave her a light smile. Briefly, she wondered if she should hold her tongue, but remembered once more Shiro’s insistence on honesty. And even with that honesty, her normally secretive future husband did still need some prodding to speak on occasion.

“Lotor, is something the matter? You have held me quite a bit recently.”

His smile faltered and he sighed.

“Lotor?”

“I apologize for worrying you, I just… I do not trust easily and…,” he closed his eyes. “I feel as though this is a dream and I will wake up. Or even that I never left the quintessence field....”

Her heart nearly seized. Lotor was the emperor of the vast reaches of space, but he was now telling her he was anxious about all of it? About her?

“I can assure you, Emperor Lotor, that you are alive and well, and that I am joining you on your throne to right the wrongs of the past. I want to be here, _with you_. I am choosing this path to walk, _with you_ , into the future. We will create harmony into the vast reaches of space, _together_.”

He pulled Allura completely flush against him, his hands splayed on her back as he let out a long breath into her undone hair.

“We are continuing being honest with one another, correct?” he asked, his voice so low as to almost be a whisper.

“I had hoped that would never change. Too many secrets have caused us harm.” As she spoke, she leaned back slightly to reach up and run her fingers along the side of his face. He let out a soft sigh again as he closed his eyes at her touch.

“So much has happened over the deca-phoebs. I have been betrayed, and I have lost people. I even lost someone I held dear... to my father’s wrath.” His voice had grown hoarse, and Allura didn’t press for more.

He was silent for at least three dobashes.

“I was so young. She was a queen. I told you of that mining planet I was placed in charge of, when we went to Oriande. That was her planet.”

Lotor opened his eyes and his look was one of the saddest she had seen from him. Allura stayed silent.

“I knew my father would never approve, but my mother was Altean, surely it would not matter if I had a… _liaison_ with someone who was so loyal to the empire. Unfortunately, that never came up. I argued for the planet being so prosperous, and my _reward_ was to be knocked unconscious. When I awoke, the planet was nearly already obliterated, and Ven’tar was nowhere to be found. I will never know what happened to her.”

Allura swallowed and tried to keep herself from crying. The rawness of his words and his voice was nearly too much to bear.

“Lotor,” she said with a tenderness that wasn’t forced, “I have no doubts she appreciated what you attempted to do. Only you could have tried to protect her.”

She watched as his eyes started to water, and he closed them to avoid looking at her.

“Perhaps.”

“Was she… did you love her?” Allura blurted it out, and realized this whole conversation was making her incredibly insecure. She had never considered the life Lotor had before she had been revived from the cryosleep, that in his past he might have someone else he loved dearly that wasn’t her. It made her start to second guess how much he cared about her as a person and not just The Altean Princess, regardless of what had been said and done.

“I did.”

His words cut her more than she thought was possible. A jealousy she had never known as a pampered princess from a loving family sliced across her heart, and she tried to stop herself from feeling that way over someone she had never met. She had to be strong and accept everything for this to work between them.

“Then, I have no doubts she knew you did all you could for her. Nobody could stand up to Zarkon until it was a combined effort of many factions. Perhaps she knows that you were the one to make the decisive blow to stop more harm across the galaxies. I believe she would be as proud of you as I am.”

At that, Allura moved both her hands to Lotor’s face, as she watched tears escape from his closed eyes and down his cheeks. It occurred to the princess that he had probably never properly mourned the death of what she assumed was his first love. Wiping his cheeks with her thumbs, she leaned up and kissed his forehead. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and pulled him down to rest his head against her collarbone as he continued to hold her fast against him. Where he grasped her sides, the pinpricks of his claws starting to dig into her bare skin hurt a bit, but she wasn’t about to say anything to him over it. Kolivan’s words about her willingness to withstand pain for his need came bubbling to the surface of her thoughts. While she was not thrilled over the prospect, it helped to diminish her feelings of jealousy over a long dead queen. Lotor needed _her_ , here and now. Allura started to wonder if the slight pain was something she was unconsciously willing to endure over how much she had made him suffer.

After what felt like a varga, Lotor sighed against her.

“Thank you, Allura,” he whispered as she began to run her fingers across his hair and his grip on her loosened.

“You don’t need to thank me.”

“I _am_ thankful, so I will voice as much. You really do not know how much this means to me.” He paused, making her heart feel like it was exploding at his words. “I only wish you could have held me like this after I drove that sword through my father.”

Allura’s blood turned to ice and her hand stilled. They had barely spoken around when that had occurred. She’d never given much thought how much Lotor had suffered by being the one to have to kill Emperor Zarkon; barely surviving in hand-to-hand combat against him, and ending his life to protect Voltron. To protect _her_.

“If your actions have been weighing on your mind, please, let me be of some relief to you.” As she spoke, he squeezed her briefly.

Allura expected him to say something, but he stayed silent.

“Perhaps,” she began again, speaking as tenderly as possible, “we can speak on your father before the war. He was no longer himself by the time we had to face him together, Lotor. I realize it might be painful to hear what you missed out on, but it also might be a comfort to know the man who loved you before you were born was not the half dead creature you had to kill.”

By now, she could feel him breathing against her skin, in short, quick breaths, clearly trying to stay calm. Her mind was racing on what she should do.

“Please,” he whispered, “I would like that.”

 

–

 

Allura was leaning her head on Lotor’s shoulder, while they both lounged on her small settee. She had a little holoscreen propped up on a stand in front of them on the table. Videos taken at various points in her life or from a general library from the castle’s databank were playing at random. She was hoping to show him pieces of Altea, stuck in time. They were holding hands between them on the cushion, and he was gripping her probably with more force than he realized.

“What were weddings like, on Altea?” he asked as a video showed a clip of children helping to prepare flowers for a new deca-phoeb’s holiday.

“Oh, usually out in the spring air. There was an open rotunda near the castle, overlooking a field of juniberry flowers for the high nobles and royals. My parents were married there, and probably generations back. Most unions occurred in the spring due to many claelurs taking so long to be pieced back together that it could be planned better. The cold phoebs were popular for proposals. My father took two whole deca-phoebs to manage to reassemble my mother’s star. She claimed three if she was particularly angered by him.” Allura giggled into her free hand.

“King Alfor did not please your mother?”

“Crown Prince Alfor at that point, and no, he kept irritating her. She even threatened to call off the engagement before she had even given him a single shard. Coran embellishes the tale with each retelling, making their marriage having actually occurred even more unbelievable.”

Lotor’s hand in hers relaxed somewhat.

“Usually the weddings were in the center of the large crowd. A proof of marriage, as they made bold declarations to one another. Truth be told, our fathers were friends by then, and Prince Alfor shocked the entire assembly by cutting his skin to make what I have heard was a very Galran blood oath of unwavering devotion to my mother. She was far more pleased with him after such a display.”

Allura glanced up at Lotor. He frowned for a moment before he grinned.

“That would be a Tar’Intar. A blood oath of the greatest magnitude. Those were very rare to be taken, even in that time.”

She laughed. “I have no doubts once my father learned of such a ceremony, he would not have relented, badgering Zarkon for all the details until he was told. He was quite tenacious once he had an idea in his head.”

“He was the Red Paladin, was he not?”

Allura laughed again.

They sat and watched random clippings from the databank for a long while longer. In addition to short bits of her as a child, there had been videos made of the natural world of Altea that played on holoscreens during state events, meant to be calming and beautiful examples of their planet. Those were now all that was left of many or all of the species of flora and fauna shown within… flowers and trees all blowing in the wind, birds and other animals Lotor was fascinated by, scurrying across the field of vision.

“I have been neglectful of you, Allura, I did not tell you today of the ceremonies to come like I promised.” She smiled sleepily in response as he continued. “The wedding takes place over four quintants. Traditional weddings are three, each representing the seasons from Daibazaal, but the members of the royal family have a fourth to represent the eternal darkened season on the so-called ‘underside’ of the planet. The first quintant, the Zriga’ir, representing the icy season with nearly no light, is a test of strength in difficult circumstances, and coming together as strangers. For us it will additionally represent having been enemies on the field of battle, and now working in unison. It is fitting that it is tradition to be a sword dance.”

He smiled at her, and she was instantly more alert.

“A sword dance? There’s not much time to prepare for that….”

“Ah, I realize this might be unexpected, but that is also part of the tradition and the difficult nature of the display; we will have one quintant allotted to practice and learn together.”

“Lotor, that is not nearly enough-” she was interrupted as he placed a finger on her lips and smiled down at her, deviously.

“Have we not been practicing our movements together already, my love?”

Allura’s face felt hot as she considered his implications… remembrances of his hands roaming her curves, and her legs wrapping around his waist….

“That is not quite what I had envisioned a sword dance to be…,” she whispered against his finger. He chuckled as he removed it, and then leaned down to leave a kiss on her lips in its place.

“I know you have hand-to-hand combat skills, Allura. We will be fine. Much like how our marriage will start out, I will guide you to learn that which you do not yet know, and the rest will come naturally as we continue together.

She bit her lip. “If you are sure….”

“I am,” he said smiling. “We are now very comfortable with one another.”

“Do the Galra usually… become so _comfortable_ before they marry? It follows that to partake in such a ceremony, and your confidence in our ‘dance,’ that perhaps…?

“Yes, you are correct. It is uncommon for any Galra to not be sure they are compatible in _all_ aspects before a marriage.”

Allura’s head was swimming. She didn’t know any of this of the culture she had been in a war with for all of her life. It was no wonder he had been so eager to be intimate with her once she had accepted him and they had been attempting to repair their relationship. It had been vital to his healing.

“I see.”

“The second quintant, the Rspu’ir, representing what you would call a spring time, begins with a morning wedding ceremony. We exchange declarations of duty and honor to one another. As there has not been a royal wedding in some time, we have a bit of leeway in what we can say and do. After that, there is a small meal, and then I will take you to the formal traesk, where we will stay for an entire quintant.”

“A traesk?”

“Think of it as a room within a room. A wedding chamber within the main hall. Inside are all our basic needs, but comprised of nearly completely of just pillows and bedding. As a symbol of Rspu’ir, we are to consummate our union in the midst of the celebrations. We will be alone as a couple, and unless we yell quite loud, none will hear us. Beyond the walls around us, there will nonstop festivities. Lavish meals and libations will be served to our guests, so it can become quote rowdy outside. However, we will not be privy to this, even if they _encourage_ us to their own delight.”

Even after having shared his bed, Allura felt her face overheating again. Yet another public declaration of being intimate with Lotor. She wondered how he seemed so unfazed by it.

“After the full quintant alone together, we will reemerge to great fanfare, and the Varik’ir, the great harvest, begins. As I mentioned previously, this is traditionally looking forward to the future, and often is the building of a cradle for children. We will use alchemy to make ours, and it is generally less public a display.”

Lotor smiled softly at her, and she couldn’t help but return it with a shy one of her own.

“What of the fourth quintant?”

“That is the Vresn’ir. It represents the unyielding season of the other side of the planet, the unity of the Galra, and the unwavering eternal power of the throne. On that quintant, we… will...”

Lotor trailed off and stopped talking, his eyes wide and distractedly looking back to the holoscreen. Allura followed his gaze, and gasped. On the screen were two figures chatting in the background of a garden scene, hands held as the woman was clearly laughing prettily. It was Honerva and Zarkon.


	9. Remembrances

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before this chapter, I wanted to thank everyone who has been reading so far! I try and respond to as many comments as I can.
> 
> I also want to note that originally this started out as being a short story, but as I worked on it more, I realized how well everything fit together if someone had just cared to do it... instead of making it some bastardized mix of original Voltron and Macross. So this has now evolved to be a full on fix-it/reboot, and is going to be going on for ages. lol

Allura felt Lotor gripping her hand tighter. They both stared at the holoscreen showing Honerva and Zarkon, ten thousand deca-phoebs ago, smiling and flirting with one another. It was very surreal to see after knowing Lotor had killed his father... as an unfeeling, undead monster.

After a while, the figures walked out of the view, and she heard Lotor take what was probably the first breath in doboshes. Allura squeezed his hand in response, and when he turned to look at her, she softly smiled at him.

“I apologize, I had no idea this was recorded. I hope this did not upset you, Lotor.”

She watched as his eyebrows upticked and he had to look away from her.

“No, it did not upset me. I just… it was a bit unexpected. The records I have of them are brief and I have looked at them thousands of time. This one is so fresh.”

She squeezed his hand again. It was obvious he was affected in multiple ways. The princess was not able to point this out, so she decided to just support him in whatever way he asked her for.

They poured over other recordings from the same time period, but nothing else showed the emperor and empress. He was clearly dejected.

Allura distracted him by bringing up instructional holos on military tactics and weaponry, followed by one for children learning alchemy. Those worked. His exuberance returned. After a more advanced one, he turned to her, and pushed her hair back off her shoulder.

“I really should finish healing your neck.”

“Oh, I thought it was complete. I had not thought to check.”

“No, I did hold back a bit, I apologize. It’s still quite visible, as if it were a bit older.”

Allura smiled at him, closed her eyes and tilted her head. The room seemed to fill with static as she could _feel_ him reach into his abilities, much more assured of what he was doing. His hand touched her with that warmth and a coolness to it, making her skin felt a little tingly.

“You are so very beautiful,” he whispered, his voice very close to her.

She opened her eyes slightly to see him leaned over, cheeks glowing brightly in the dimmed room. A thrill ran through her body at the sight in so intimate a manner.

For a long time she had been convinced she was one of the last Alteans. Seeing him, one of _her_ generation, very close to her, with his cheeks glowing, reminded her again that she was not alone and never would be… that while he hadn’t been raised as one of their people, he had a strong eagerness to learn everything. He cared... he cared about all of it. And any children they have would have strong alchemic abilities, and belong to two royal lines. She was safe, she was loved, and she was not alone.

Allura, still smiling, tilted her head forward to meet his lips. The kiss was chaste at first, and soft. But that didn’t last long as he moved his hand from the side of her neck to grasp behind and tangle into her hair. The other slid around her waist, pulling her towards him on the settee. Her want for him was so strong she hadn’t even realized she was gripping his sides until he took a deep breath in before making a low rumble of pleasure in his chest.

She laughed as he led them back onto her bed. Lotor gently pushed her onto the blankets. Looking up at him, her eyes filled with joyful tears. He was smiling down at her, his cheeks still glowing brightly and his hair spilling over his shoulders making a curtain around them. Reaching up, she pulled him down by his ears into a passionate kiss.

When they broke to breathe, she asked him if he had fully healed her neck this time.

“I believe I have. And the pricks on your back. Though… perhaps I should undress you and check, just to be sure.”

The grin on his face made her stomach flutter, and she watched as he began to unravel the ties on her sleeping attire.

“Perhaps you should...”

He looked up at her with a smoldering gaze, and she couldn’t help but giggle. He made a low growl before he pulled the top of her nightgown off.

 

–

 

Allura woke to a gentle sound. She blinked and looked about. Her heart felt warm as she saw Lotor leaned back against the headboard, the blankets draped across his waist and legs the only covering he had. His hair was disheveled, several swoops cutting across his features next to the one he normally let loose. A small datapad was in his hand, leaned against his knees, and a video softly playing on it. She recognized it as a famous schoolmaster’s lecture on the ancient histories of Altea. She smiled up at him as he glanced down at her.

“Good waking, Allura. I hope your sound sleeping was not plagued by nightmares this time?”

“Hmm, no, not this time, thank you. What are you watching?” she asked as she snuggled closer to him, keeping the bedclothes up over her shoulders.

“Coran sent me a note, suggesting some videos. He claimed it would ‘ease’ our situation. Did this queen really kill her husband so often?”

Mortification and extreme annoyance flooded her veins. Quickly, she brought her hands up to cover her face, unable to look at him.

“I’m not upset,” he whispered to her, and she felt him gently push her hair behind her ear.

“I cannot believe he told you about that, and so soon.” Her voice was muffled behind her palms. “We are still on such shaky ground and it is so, so very unacceptable what I did to you….”

“Would it help if I told you this history eases my mind?”

Allura peeked from between her fingers. He was grinning at her.

“I cannot imagine why….”

“Even at the risk of you becoming irritated with me, I will be honest with you; another man has suffered the same fate as myself... married to a powerful Altean queen, faced her wrath leading into the grave, and learned the lesson of not being more mindful of her. I count myself lucky it only took you a single quintant and not a full movement to bring me back. And only once.”

Allura could feel the tears welling up in her eyes. Looking down, she whispered a reply. “I’m not a queen and we aren’t married yet...”

“You headed an intergalactic resistance, you are far more important than a mere queen.”

Her eyes shot up to his as he put his hand over hers on her cheek. His expression was soft as he wiped away a tear that had escaped with his thumb.

“I’m sorry…,” she managed to whisper as she started to cry in earnest.

Lotor moved the datapad from his lap and leaned over to pull her up into his embrace. Her face was pressed into his bare shoulder, and she vaguely was aware of him stroking her back.

“We will get through this, together, Allura.”

She swallowed down a hiccup in response, unsure how anyone could possibly trust themselves after such actions against their lover...

 

–

 

Allura played with the edge of her helmet as she stood next to Lotor in the hangar. He put one of his hands over hers.

“I thought it best if we go on a small trip today instead of the meeting. I already informed the others involved. Is that acceptable?”

She looked up and tried to smile. “If you think so.”

“We have both been experiencing much turmoil, the meeting can wait.”

“You still haven’t explained where we will be going...”

“We are still right beside Daibazaal, so we will be going to gather materials for the Varik’ir.”

“Oh. Did… did anyone ever go to salvage anything? I know the evacuation was quite fast.”

“I do not believe so. Once my father returned, his focus was not on sentimentality.”

“I see.”

“This won’t be painful for either of us. I never knew Daibazaal, and you won’t have any real attachments. We’ll be fine.”

“It’s still a bit sad….”

He lightly squeezed her hand.

Allura looked up at him and nodded, and he led her by the hand as they boarded a small cruiser.

 

–

 

It was so very dark, even the large rock Allura and Lotor were floating above was itself dark. She felt like there was a wind, something pulling at her to move, but there was not. The gravity had left the planet the moment it had imploded and with that went things like the very air.

Allura couldn’t bring herself to look at him while they gazed across the remains of the home planet of the entire Galra race.

“My father didn’t tell me the details of the evacuation, the whole situation was so quick and unstable. Once the Emperor and Empress vanished into the tear in reality, there was nothing containing it. I remember the planet was rocked by quakes and bright flashes of light,” she said, her voice trailing off.

<<Yes, I had heard as much. According to several reliable sources, King Alfor even considered imploding Voltron to close the rift. No matter what he did, it would have not saved the planet. Daibazaal was doomed as soon as the comet hit it. The question I have always wondered is how they didn’t know of the comet beforehand? The technology should have been in place to notify them in advance.>>

“Perhaps it was not in our dimension until it was too late.”

<<Ah, that is a perspective to consider with such a thing.>>

They didn’t speak for a while, looking around them in silence. Allura spotted a less darkened piece floating nearby, and using her thrusters, moved towards it. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw movement. Turning her head in that direction, she didn’t see anything… at least not at first against the blackness of space. But in a quick blur, she saw the movement again, this time against the backdrop of a floating piece of rock.

The second her eyes locked onto it, whatever it was turned towards her and her blood turned to ice; it was one of those dark entities from the rift. There was that same loud screeching in her head from the dream. She wanted to yell to Lotor, but her voice wouldn’t work and she froze in terror at the remembrances of that nightmare.

She watched, feeling as if in slow motion, as the black creature zoomed at her... and then right through the space she had just occupied as she was pushed to her side. Her vision started filling with blue and black. _Lotor._

The emperor stopped them moving, and he was snarling across the communication line as he wrapped one of his arms around her body. With the other, he pulled out his sword.

<<Hold onto me!>>

She tried to do as he said, her fingers feeling weak and half numb. The creature screamed again, and it made her grip around his middle in fear. Lotor twisted and moved, and she heard a terrible noise that pierced her ears and yet sounded like a box of bolts hitting the floor. Then, there was silence.

Allura continued to hold onto him as he shifted again, this time to wrap his other arm around her. She couldn’t bring herself to look around, keeping her eyes pinched closed... there might be more of them.

<<Allura. It is gone, it vanished into a bright light as I sliced through it.>>

Her shock made her forget her fear, and she pulled back to look up at him.

“It did what?”

<<It vanished. I’m not entirely sure how. It is probably best if we do not dally here thinking on it.>>

She nodded, and took a deep breath.

<<We can come back later to find a piece to use. Perhaps this particular time was a bad… omen.>>

“You said this location would most likely yield the best results for more pre-blast chunks. It would be a waste to have to return again. Let’s see how this one looks first.”

Looking around, she grabbed onto Lotor’s hand, a new determination filled her as she lead him the rest of the short distance to the piece she had eyed before.

<<Allura… we can’t use that.>>

She turned to look at him with a quizzical look. He had a screen up from his vambrace, with an outline of the chunk and readouts on it. She turned back and stared at it, not understanding his meaning until he spoke again.

<<Of all the things for you to find, you managed to locate a broken piece of wall from the royal palace.>>

Allura’s heart lurched. She had been within the walls of that palace. Lotor would have been conceived within, too.

“We should take it with us anyway.”

<<I’m not sure if- >>

“Please. I want to.”

<<If that is what you wish.>>

She felt him squeeze her hand before he let go, floating closer to attach a small tracker to the chunk. Allura followed behind. Staying near one another, they marked several other pieces to be picked up remotely. A few dobashes later, as they were returning themselves to the ship, they watched as the drones picked up the markers and followed them back to the cruiser.

 

–

 

Taking off her helmet, Allura tried to breath calmly. Now that they were back in his flagship, the full force of the terrifying situation with that black entity hit her once more. She didn’t even realize she had stumbled until she heard the clatter of Lotor’s own helmet on the floor as he wrapped his arms around her waist to steady her.

“Allura….”

“I apologize, I’m fine. I would like to rest….”

“Of course. Would you like to stay here, or go back to your own rooms?”

She sank to the floor, unsure of her feelings and legs. The more she thought, the more tired she was of new experiences for the moment. She looked up at him, kneeling next to her, his expression soft and worried as he moved to grip her upper arms.

“Please,” she began, her voice little more than a whisper. “I would like to be in my own chambers. But… will you stay with me? I don’t want to be alone….”

“Whatever you need,” he said as he pulled her closer to him and helped her stand on shaky legs.

Allura tried to will herself to not cry, the experience still too fresh.

“Thank you… it would have harmed me if you hadn’t been there….”

Lotor slowed their walking, and she felt him press a kiss to the top of her head.

“I will never let anything happen to you. What would my empire think of me if I did after that unspoken declaration you made in front of my entire ship with the Tar’Kasa marks and your neck?”

Allura managed to softly giggle, and he squeezed his arms around her as they continued on their way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Read and review! <3


	10. Forgiveness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try for a chapter a week, let's see how long I can do that! Comments always help motivation :3c

Lotor was stretched out across her bed, laying on his stomach, wearing naught but tight black underthings. Allura bit her lip, shifting her bare legs from under her short night dress to be more comfortable as she straddled the back of his thighs.

“Allura, are you sure you don’t want to relax? I was under the impression I was to be here for _your_ comfort.”

She laughed, and shocked herself at the levity of it, making her attitude shift slightly.

“I… I don’t need to be pampered, really. I just… being close is fine. I had thought perhaps you could take care of that creature again if it followed m-us? You were quite formidable before, even in a different plane...”

He twisted to lean on his elbow to look up at her. The serious look in his gaze made her worry she had said the wrong thing, but when she saw his jaw and under his eyes slightly twitch she realized that she had tickled some sort of primal sense of protection in him. A slight thrill went through her at the thought.

They stayed staring at one another for what felt like several dobashes, and Allura started to grow self conscious. When she looked down and began to blink repeatedly in a way to try and force the mood to leave her, Lotor relaxed his body and returned to his previous position.

“If that is what you desire.”

She smiled, and while she knew he couldn’t see, he would hear it in her voice. “We are to be equal in all things, are we not?” Moving her hand, she grazed it across his lower back with a soft touch. “Perhaps I wish to pamper _you_ , for a little bit.”

He didn’t respond, but she watched as Lotor’s body rose slightly under her fingers as he took in and released a deep breath.

Allura looked across his form. He was muscular but lean, and so very tall. She had never considered having much preferences in a desired life companion, but was finding he was exactly what she wanted. Even her distaste and apprehension against all those with Galra blood had dissipated with her extreme humiliation and the consequences of her poor judgement. Between Lotor, Keith, all in the Blades, and those in the empire who had supported Voltron and their cause, she had lost all negative reactions and thoughts for her previous attitude.

Moving her other hand to match the first, she began to apply pressure as she pushed her hands slowly up his expansive back. Lotor made a soft moan as she reached the muscles connecting to his shoulders. Allura kneaded deeper there, trying to relax him.

Methodically, her hands gradually moved higher. His shoulders came next. While continuing the massaging and gripping around his skin, Allura felt her body growing warmer, and it wasn’t from exertion. Her mind wandered to their first time in Sincline. Adjusting her legs as her body turned itself over to a definite need, she tried not to think too hard about that experience. She had never told him or let on that it had actually been her first time with anyone. She idly wondered how he would react. Would it even matter? Her heart began to ache as she thought about it more, and she tried to focus on moving her hands down to his biceps.

The quintessence had heightened their senses and desires, she knew that happened with acute exposure. She couldn’t have asked for a better time with him, or anyone… but then it wasn’t even a full varga later that she had tossed him on his head in anger, and then when returning to the rift she had-

Lotor saying her name broke her out of her thoughts. He had twisted himself again to look up at her, and she realized her hands had ceased moving across him. They were resting on his arms, trembling. And she was crying. Her tears dripping onto the bare skin of his back must have alerted him to her current state.

Allura looked at him for just a tick before bringing her hands up to cover her face. He moved beneath her, turning around fully and sitting up, and in no time had his arms around her. He held her close, and as she leaned into the crook of his neck, she let herself cry.

“Don’t push yourself,” he whispered into her hair.

When she felt calm enough to speak, she responded in a whisper. “Everything is happening so fast. I just… it’s too much. I don’t know what to do or how to react anymore....”

“You need to forgive yourself.”

Allura stopped breathing, the feeling leaving her hands. She let them slide down her face as she listened to him explain.

“I know this is all occurring at an alarming pace. The union is moving forward far faster than we would otherwise wish. But please remember, I care for you, Allura.”

Shiro’s words once again came back to her… “ _he’s guarding his heart.”_ Her paladin had been completely correct.

Lotor took a deep breath. She felt it as his entire body shifted around her, and his grip on her loosened as she felt his fingers run along her back in a gentle back and forth manner.

“I admit a few vindictive feelings passed through me when I was in Sincline, and even after... but they are just that; passed. I believe you are holding what happened between us in anger and quintessence influence against yourself more than even I had been at that time.”

She could feel him start playing with one of her curls as she tried to speak normally and not sniffle.

“You make it sound so simple. Before, you said you couldn’t trust me. And I hurt you so terribly, why would you want to be with me after that? I just still don’t quite understand....”

His hand stopped, and he rested his palm on her back to lightly squeeze her.

“I admit to it still being a rather tender subject, however I’m not holding it against you any longer, Allura.”

She took in a sharp breath. Half a beat later, he pulled her back from him. With her in his lap, they were eye level, and he reached up a hand to push her hair behind her ear while keeping her gaze. When it was clear she would not speak, he continued on, his voice soft and calming.

“I am touched you are still so concerned. Kolivan’s words were true, everything you have done since to right the wrong you committed is very meaningful to me.”

Lotor paused in his speaking, reaching down to pick up her hands. He placed a kiss on the back of each, before holding them together in his.

“Allura… I forgive you, for everything. I want our marriage to be a fresh start for us, and we cannot do that if I am holding anything against you.”

She forgot to breathe again. His words were so genuine, she had no doubt he spoke the truth. It only took a few ticks before her vision blurred as her eyes once more filled with tears. Lotor had a smile on his face, but she could tell he was holding back from crying nearly as much as she was.

“I… I just….”

“Please, let yourself be free of the burden of your previous actions. You are a very strong woman, and I am honored you decided to stand by my side on the Galra throne. We cannot move forward together if we burden ourselves with the problems of our recent past… not when we both wish to fix the grievous errors of the previous generation. I would like to give you more time to adjust, but it is a luxury I am afraid even my vast empire cannot afford.”

Allura closed her eyes, feeling tears streak down her cheeks as she took in a deep breath. His words sounded as rehearsed as the declaration he had made when he asked her to be his empress. He’d clearly been mulling over how to speak to her about this for a while.

Lotor’s hands left hers, and he pulled her against him again. This time, she didn’t break down into sobs, but she still was not calm enough to speak.

Taking several deep breaths, she let her hands grip at his chest. Pressing her face into his skin and leaning againt him fully, she relaxed into only occasional small hiccups for air as he stroked his hand along her barely covered shoulders under her undone hair.

Eventually, she calmed enough that she was breathing slowly against him, and she could feel his head pressed against hers. She made a soft sighing moan, and he made a humming noise in response. She felt as though a burden had finally been lifted.

“Lotor,” she started, barely above a whisper, “I had been trying to take into consideration that perhaps you still cared for me, after a few words of encouragement and the suggestion from Shiro. I wondered about your harsh words before you left the castle on the day I brought you back. I half expected you to never return, but for the ships...”

He started to rub his hand fully across her back again in soft motions.

“I was furious then, and it was not all at you, some of it was at myself for allowing things to become so disorganized. I knew my mood would abate eventually. I would not ask any of this of you if I did not want you by my side merely because I want you there, my love.”

Moving his hands to her arms, Lotor gently pulled her away from him once more. She looked up at him with cheeks still stained with tears, and he reached up to wipe them dry with his thumb.

“I need you, Allura.” She blinked up at him. “I will admit you bring some enticing prospects with you, such as your large, famous robot, and an even larger coalition, but that is all superficial. You are one of a kind, in so many ways, and the thought of not having you by my side is abhorrent. It took us ten thousand deca-phoebs to find each other, I will do whatever is necessary to keep you with me.”

Allura’s heart flooded with all the normal feelings a bride expected to have when hearing such a declaration from her intended, and she felt her eyes brim with new but happy tears.

“You are being quite loquacious.”

He laughed softly. “Things might have gone very differently if I had been a bit more vocal on certain subjects previously. I intend to change that moving forward. We will never have a misunderstanding like that again.”

She reached up with one of her hands to touch his cheek.

“I hope not.”

“I guarantee it,” he said and leaned his forehead on hers as they both closed their eyes.

Allura felt herself calming down more the longer they stayed like that. She didn’t move from his lap. His long speech over how important she was had given her a warm feeling pooling in her stomach. She could start to get a glimpse of what an unburdened future would be, the problems of the past few movements starting to fade, and she felt renewed.

Opening her eyes, she watched him. The princess whispered his name, and he slowly opened his to look at her. She smiled at him, staring at the bright blueish color of his irises, before she tilted her head to press her lips against his in a soft kiss.

When they broke to breathe, he gave her a quizzical look before speaking as she played with the hair down the back of his neck with her fingers.

“I have been wondering, Allura, what did you mean when you said the other quintant you ‘hoped to never be parted again’ ?”

She blinked for a moment before she could recall saying that.

“I… I just, I mean, when we’re apart, is when things tend to go a bit awry. And… and when I said that we had been… it’s… I wanted to comfort you, and not think I was going to abandon you again to those creatures. And I like being close to you, I just-”

Lotor kissed the tip of her nose. Allura made a small gasp, and could feel herself grow warmer in near embarrassment.

“You’ve explained enough, I understand. I’m glad you feel this way,” he whispered as his hands slid down her sides to grasp at her hips.

The warmth she felt took over her entire body. Her face heated in embarrassment at what they discussed, but she also felt it between her legs. His intense stare was becoming overwhelming and she had to look away. She could feel him still watching her.

Lotor whispering her name brought her attention back to his eyes, and he started to rub his thumbs back and forth on her exposed skin. She hadn’t realized her night dress had ridden up completely, and he had pushed it the remaining way to bunch around the tops of her thighs. She could see as a fire was starting to kindle in his eyes, and feel it under her thighs between his legs.

Allura was vaguely aware of the fact they were acting like newlyweds… even amidst all the emotional and political turmoil, they still were touching one another frequently when they were alone. It dawned on her that her paladins and even Coran had been leaving them be… someone was orchestrating that. She would have to find out and thank-

Her thoughts were interrupted as Lotor slid his hands fully to grasp onto her backside, pushing under her thin panties, skin on skin. The momentum pushed her up to kneeling, and against him. Lotor leaned up, kissing across her neck and down her collarbone as he grasped and squeezed handfuls of her bottom with his fingers. When his nose reached the fabric strap of her clothing, he snaked his tongue under the edging, leaving a wet trail across her cleavage and under the night dress.

After the expressiveness of their conversation, Allura felt like they were having a fresh beginning right now.... He had forgiven her of her past actions. She wanted to cry more with a sense of relief, but his hands inching down as he kept pressing his fingers into her skin was making her focus shift into a different sort of relief. She let her hands slide from behind his neck down across his shoulders, to grip at the tops of his muscular arms.

“I want you, completely,” he whispered as he kissed back up her neck. Allura could feel herself breathing heavier.

“Then take me, I’m yours,” she managed to get out.

Her reply must have sent that fire she had seen in his eyes into a raging inferno. With a quick motion, he pushed her panties down with one hand, while the other went between her legs from the back. She took in a shaky breath as his fingers ran across her skin and forward.

“You’re so wet already,” he whispered against her ear.

Allura bit her lip, and he didn’t wait to push her apart and dip his fingers in. She expected him to take it slow, but he immediately set about touching her everywhere. Fingers were inside her and caressing her, and she shifted to spread her legs farther for him, moving her whole body lower.

Lotor’s stroking stopped, with him moving to grip the back of her thigh with slick fingers. His other hand left holding her underthings, and she felt him start to rub his hardness around on her. His breathing went ragged.

“Do you want me inside you, Allura?”

She took in a shaky breath, and he groaned in response. He pressed around against her for a full dobash, before sliding farther back. He started to push her apart with his tip, but didn’t continue on. His fingers returned to her from the front, and he flicked around on her in circles.

The princess made a soft moan, her anticipation high. Opening her mouth, she flicked her tongue along the edge of his ear. With it wet, she blew across it before speaking low.

“You have my heart and mind, now take my body.”

Lotor groaned and pulled her down by her thighs, thrusting himself fully up into her at the same time. She was sure she made some sort of gasping noise at him sinking into her with force, but it was drowned out by his second groan. They stayed like that for half a tick, before he bounced her on his lap. Allura gripped at his shoulders to hold herself steady.

“Please, ride me like you mean it,” he growled out, his voice coarse and giving her a thrill at the need she could hear from him.

Allura wasn’t sure she could possibly feel any more overheated, but she absolutely did at his words. Shifting her hips forward, he slid out of her a little, and when she went to push back, he thrust up into her again.

“Is this a combined effort?” she asked with a jovial tone, even though she felt breathless at the feeling.

He hummed in response as he moved a hand to her lower back, and kissed down her neck again. Allura assumed that was a no, and proceeded to move on her own. She started out slow, an almost leisurely pace of rocking her hips and bringing him out, before she pushed down, plunging him back inside.

Lotor’s hand on her back gripped her tighter, and his other moved to pull the top of her dress down. His tongue darted out and across her skin. If he had a planned direction, it was lost as Allura started to grind herself onto him with more force, wrapping her arms around his neck to hold him close. His hand let go of the dress straps as they bunched under her breasts and across her elbows. Shifting, he put his hand on her upper back, pressing her bare and heaving cleavage against his face.

It was several dobashes of Allura grinding on him with increasing roughness. Without warning, he moved his face, and started leaving sucking nips across one of her bouncing breasts. His mouth found her peak, licking and gently biting at her. A small groan escaped her already parted mouth.

Lotor moved both his hands to pull her slightly away from him, the loss of his mouth on her making her pout down at him.

“Lean back.”

She blinked, but did as he said, still trying to maintain the movements she had been making as she braced herself back against his now slightly bent knees. His hand left her lower back, moving across her upper thigh and down. When his thumb grazed her slick flesh right above where they were connected, sparks shot through her body. Her focus faltered when he started to flick her in that spot, making her slow her movements of thrusting him inside and out of her.

“Don’t stop, please…,” he whined out in a voice she hadn’t heard from him before.

She tried to keep the pace, but where his thumb was now rubbing incessantly was too distracting. Lotor started to make up for her lax motions, and pushed up into her. They moved together, a new, pleasurable momentum, but when he took her nipple back into his mouth, she lost all reason.

Allura gripped her fingers into his shoulders as she felt herself on the brink of her release. Her inability to focus dissipated as she realized arching her back gave her a better sensation. She pushed against Lotor to drive him into her harder. He hummed as he responded to her movements, the increased force of his plunging making her come against him with a labored moan.

She could feel herself relaxing after her hard climax, but he didn’t stop touching her. Allura was about to mention it when he dug his hand into her back, and thrust into her with a new roughness. His mouth left her breast, and drown out her words with his lips and tongue. He kissed her with an unrefined urgency she hadn’t felt from him before. With his lashing tongue, his member filling her, and his thumb moving against her still, she felt herself quickly moving towards another release.

His tongue stilled against hers as she felt him twitch inside her accompanying his hard thrusts. Lips pulled from hers, and he breathed heavy against her mouth as he let out a stifled groan as he came. But he didn’t stop any of his motions, pushing her into a second orgasm. Pinching her eyes closed, Allura let herself go, gasping against him as her body flooded with a numbing feeling.

When she regained her senses, strong arms were around her, pulling her on top of him as he laid back onto the bed. He laughed, a soft, happy sound, as she adjusted her dress, and snuggled into his neck.

“I’m glad we had our discussion,” he said softly before he left a kiss on the top of her head.

Allura let out a calm whine, and watched her hand as she made circles with her fingertips across his chest.

“I believe I am, as well.”

He made a pleased sound, hugging her closer to him with his arm she was laid against, and kissed the top of her head again.

After a while of laying in silence, a thought occurred to her in her relaxed clarity.

“Lotor, why do you think that creature was in the remnants of Daibazaal?”

“It’s hard to say precisely, but it is entirely within the realm of possibility that it’s because this is where the tear in realities happened. It only went after you, perhaps they are attracted to those who are powerful in the use of alchemy...?

“That would explain the nightmare,” she whispered, “and, perhaps, how it was so easy for you to find me from inside Sincline.”

“A distressed spirit,” he said with a serious tone. “Now _that_ is a thought...”

The happy mood shifted, and she was sorry to see it go, but after their discussion, she knew they could always return to it later. She was feeling confident with him now, like they could fix anything they dealt with, together, openly. Sitting up with her hands pressing on his chest, she looked down at him, a new determination filling her.

“Since the meeting will be soon, it’s past time we discussed Keith….”


	11. Changing of the Guard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three days after I posted I would be updating a chapter a week, my living situation turned into chaos. I am focusing on trying to get together as much money as possible and get the hell away from my narcissistic roommate and her bullshit, so I am unsure as to my ability to continue the schedule I had planned :(
> 
> Some of you may have noticed I changed the early on timeline a little bit, and that will become a little more clear! The whole end of S6 was a mess, so I rearranged scenes to make actual sense.
> 
> I am also not tagging new things that come up after Chapter 10! I'll be avoiding huge triggers, though.

Keith sneezed rather hard.

“Gesundheit,” Hunk said before he lazily rolled a 20 sided die.

“Whoa, Hunk, I didn’t know you spoke German!”

“I don’t.”

“It’s a pretty common usage in English, Lance. Are you going to focus? We’re all still waiting on you to pick your stats.” Pidge’s voice showed clear annoyance, which had been rather common for everyone that day.

Keith frowned, feeling more agitated himself that they were spending their time learning a game instead of a thousand other things they should be worried about. He looked at Shiro out of the corner of his eye, and it instigated the man to speak.

“This game is going to teach you all to think outside the box. We need to generate better teamwork. Our previous focus has been on in the heat of the moment fighting and hand-to-hand combat. That’s been a big mistake on my part, and I take responsibility for not expanding on your education to fit the ever changing situations. Cohesion in a skirmish relies on tactics decided even before entering the battlefield.” He leaned onto his elbow on the table in front of them. “I want you all to use this opportunity to make decisions _before_ you find yourself in the middle of combat. And above and beyond, you _must_ communicate this to one another, come to agreements, and follow through. Is that clear?”

The all started to mumble their acquiescence, but it was drowned out by Coran’s laughter.

“If you think your plans are going to work out the way you want, you’ve clearly never played _Monsters and Mana_ before, Shiro!”

“All part of the training. Think on your feet, but try and stay close to the original tactics, circling back if possible. It’s something we’ve all had trouble doing, and it has created all sorts of chaos….”

Keith sighed and stretched out, leaning his head back into the cushion to stare blankly at the ceiling. This was threatening to be a long morning. He was _supposed_ to be attending the meeting with the Blades soon, the one where he knew he was going to have hell to pay with Lotor, but the emperor had changed the time. The longer he waited, the more anxious he became.

“Why isn’t Allura with us?” he heard Hunk ask, voice laced with trepidation.

Keith glanced down across his nose without moving his head, looking at Coran as the advisor answered.

“Princess Allura is occupied with Emperor Lotor, and I am maintaining my threat that if any of you so much as _a_ _ccidentally_ interrupt their time alone together, I will norf tie you and feed you to a starving woplorger.”

“What even is a woplorger?”

“Ahhh, it’s a terrifying beast with over 30 claws and 3 noses that it uses to hunt down children who won’t clean their rooms. It drags them out their windows, kicking and screaming, before injecting them with a venom that paralyses them, but keeps them alive for 50 deca-phoebs as it slowly devours them. Nasty business.”

“Why would it care about messy rooms?”

“That doesn’t sound real….”

“Oh, it’s very real, thank you very much, Pidge! Many people didn’t believe in woplorgers until one took King Inrouvly of Cascadina when he refused to clean his study at the behest of his queen! When the royal guards finally found him, he begged for the sweet release of death.”

“That’s not very kingly of him,” Shiro said louder than he probably meant to.

“Probably! But his young son was then crowned after his father’s death, and he was one of the best kings to ever be seen on Altea! Out with the old, in with the new, as they say. Helped get the planetary unification started, a much loved monarch, to be sure. He never seemed to have a problem keeping his royal study nice and tidy….”

Keith didn’t think his anxiety could get worse, but it spiked during Coran’s tale. _Out with the old…_

He nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt Shiro place a hand on his shoulder. Looking over at him, Keith watched as he was given a reassuring smile, followed by a nod, and then Shiro spoke again.

“Let’s also use the opportunity of this game to have fun. Learning doesn’t have to be boring.”

Keith sat up as he heard Lance start whining about educational video games being “the worst.”

 

–

 

Allura followed Lotor into the large conference room of the castle ship. The same one they had walked into after the Tar’Kasa ceremony. Stepping inside she turned to look at him when she realized it was empty. He was looking straight ahead, around at the room, very obviously not to her direction.

“Lotor, I thought the meeting was supposed to start soon,” she said as she let her fingertips brush along the smooth surface of the table, keeping her eye on him as he blatantly wouldn’t turn to her.

He grinned as he shifted some of the chairs around, still very obviously ignoring looking directly at her. Pressing his palms near the edge of the large table in the center, he leaned over, crossing one of his long legs behind the other. When he was settled, a very imposing figure at the end of the table, he turned his head to her.

“This is the room where so many choices were made, isn’t it?”

“...yes?”

“Where the battles and decisions with Daibazaal and Voltron occurred, the war between our fathers, and every other important decision that had to be made…?”

Allura moved closer to him, and rested a hand atop his.

“Yes, many of the long term and political decisions. Is something the matter?”

Lotor looked up at her, a smirk on his face. They locked eyes for nearly a dobosh before he moved, little more than a blur. Allura felt herself lifted, and when all was settled, she was seated on top of the table, his hands on the table once more on either side of her. She blinked at him, their gaze level, his face so close to hers as he was leaning over her.

“What an important place this is then, isn’t it,” he whispered as he leaned down to graze his lips across her cheek.

The position they were in was making her face heat and her temperature rise. She started to grow concerned that someone would enter the room and see them like this.

“Lotor, isn’t the meeting about to start?”

With his face pressed against hers, she could feel his cheek rise with a smile she did not see.

“I changed the time for the meeting with the Coalition, but _our_ meeting is starting right now….”

His voice had grown husky and laced with insinuation. Allura could feel her anticipation spike as her body reacted.

They had spent all morning together. Soft words had been exchanged here and there when they had woken, along with little gentle touches. Then they spoke of both important decisions they would be making today, as well as mundane tidbits in their personal lives. Some of his personal belongings had arrived from his cruiser to be left in her rooms, including clothing and armor, and it really solidified their position together. He hadn’t placed them into the lodgings he had been using aboard the castle. They had been specifically brought to _her_ rooms. It had all spoken well of their progress, but they hadn’t been particularly amorous in their speaking and eating together that day. But now….

Allura felt one of his hands touch her knee, and slowly start to pull her skirts up her leg.

“Lotor, what are you doing? Is… is the door locked?”

He softly chuckled into her ear. “Yes, it was set to lock after we entered.”

That made it clear to her that this was all very much planned. She wasn’t sure how to feel about it, but she sure wasn’t against his attentions to her.

“And… what is _our_ meeting about?” she asked as she felt his fingers finally touch her bare skin under the bunched fabric.

“I had hoped to update the important history of the room.” His words were barely audible as his breath gently ran across her ear.

Allura tried to make sense of what he was saying. He was distracting her, and she couldn’t keep her thoughts straight as his fingers wrapped around her knee and pushed her legs apart. “ _Updating the history of the room…_ _the battles and decisions with Daibazaal… the war… every other important decision…”_ she nearly laughed when she realized what he was on about, and it wasn’t just amorous attentions. Ever since she had banished the horrible thoughts and feelings about anyone with Galra blood from her mind, she had been mostly treating him like he was only Altean. She had ignored his cultural upbringing and possibly whatever urges he would have as a Galran... man, and more importantly as a victorious emperor. He was giving in to his desire to _mark_ one of the most important places in the Altean castle with their union, and she was finding that she wasn’t averse to it at all.

“I like that idea,” she whispered and darted her tongue out to run it along the edge of his ear. He groaned, sending a thrill up her spine, and pushed himself between her legs as he pulled her closer against him at the edge of the table.

“I thought you might,” he murmured softly.

Allura took in a quick breath as he started to kiss under her ear and down her neck. She arched her back into him, and he grazed a hand once more across her exposed leg. Pulling back from her, Lotor looked into her eyes, his gaze slightly hazy and sending another thrill through her. She let her lids droop and leaned up, pursing her lips to him…

...but he didn’t kiss her. Instead, she felt him slide his whole body down. Opening her eyes, she watched as the top of his head disappeared under her skirts.

Lotor’s lips lightly touched the inside of her other knee. She swallowed before biting her lip. She was pretty sure this was very, very much not a discussion.

Her dress shifted, and he started to make a trail of kisses up her now exposed thigh. Allura groaned out his name, and he slid his hands up her calves. Gripping the backs of her knees, he pushed her legs farther apart still. The princess made a small gasp when she felt him start kissing the center of her underthings.

“What… what is on the agenda for our meeting, Lotor?” she managed to stammer out.

She felt him chuckle against her, sending a thrill through her stomach at the vibration. When he answered, he didn’t remove his lips from being pressed against the very thin fabric, and the slight friction made her unconsciously tighten her muscles and take in a quick breath.

“I had intended to keep my mouth busy making it clear I won’t shy away from your needs and desires being an equal priority in our union. Is that agreeable, Allura?”

She was trying hard to remember to breathe.

“Y-yes, that is agreeable. Please, continue with the presentation you have prepared for me.”

Her face felt absolutely scorching. She had no idea how, even though they had been intimate already multiple times, she felt nervous. Perhaps it was because of how innuendo laced his words had been. Or maybe she just ached with need after this build-up. Or even that they were in what should be considered a public place. Whatever it was, it did not prepare her for his tongue to start tracing the edge of her panties.

Allura was hyper aware of the wet trail he made. He ran his tongue along both sides, the light pressure touching both the very tops of her thighs, and the skin between them. She was having trouble breathing when he started to move under the edge with small licks.

Without warning, the fabric was pushed to one side. Allura attempted to remain still as she realized it was his still with his tongue, and he began to explore. One of his hands moved from her leg, and held the cloth to the side. With a feather light touch, he traced the contours of her skin, leaving another wet trail.

Slowly and methodically, his tongue worked its way across her flesh, closer to the center. Allura’s fingers gripped the edge of the table as he found his destination. She was burning there, an ache that grew in intensity as he began to so very lightly touch her with the very tip of his tongue.

Just as slowly as he had been to arrive at that spot, he began to apply pressure. It started so lightly she barely felt it, even as she ached for him, but it wasn’t too long until he was full on licking. She involuntarily shuddered, and he swept his tongue from farther down and up several times, making her gasp at the end of each fluid movement. She was pretty sure he yanked off her underthings between licks.

Lotor moved his other hand to grasp the back of her thigh near her hip, pulling her closer to him. At the same time, he wrapped his lips around her, and began to gently suck. Allura made a small moan of pleasure, and he responded by once more tonguing as he continued with the suction.

The build-up to this moment had been strong, and she found her fingers suddenly digging into his hair and trying to pull him closer. Her breathing was labored, and he responded to her reactions by increasing both his speed and pressure. When she moaned out his name, he changed his tongue to a swirling motion. She didn’t even have time to react in any way before she came against him, her fingers gripping his head and her legs pushing against him in an uncontrolled rhythm in her pleasure.

Allura was pretty sure she had voiced her reaction loudly by the way he slid up from between her legs to grin at her, his face showing how very pleased he was with himself. She slowly untangled her fingers from his hair, and rested them across her heaving chest. Lotor’s grin increased as he slowly stood, towering over her.

Letting herself fall back fully onto the table, she let her bare legs fall farther apart, her heels on the edge, skirts still bunched around her middle. She was breathing heavy, and felt so relaxed from her release. Lotor was standing at the edge still, his hands resting on her knees. She smiled up at him.

“Take me,” she whispered.

“I had not intended-”

“I told you to take me.”

Lotor’s eyes went wide, and a grin slowly spread across his face again. “If that is what you wish.”

“It is. I rather like this meeting of ours, but I would like it to be a little more _involved_. Take me in this very important room. We are changing the future, and it won’t be of war, but of love.” She bit her lip as she watched him start to breathe heavier and dig his fingers into her knees.

“You speak of love….”

“ _We are meant to be together_ , did you not say something to that effect? I find my mind is a little bit of a jumble at current.”

He smirked and let her divert his intended direction of the conversation. “I did say that.”

“I’m waiting, Emperor Lotor. I want you inside me, here and now.”

Lotor laughed as he started to strip off his pants. Allura watched him as he slowed his progress, aware of her attention to his actions.

“Do you want to stay like that?” he asked, and she wondered if he meant where she was sitting, or if perhaps…

Allura reached up and unclasped the top of her dress. She was able to pull it down great deal, enough that he could pull it down farther if he so chose. Her shoulders and all across her collarbone were exposed, including the beginnings of her cleavage, and she could see his nostrils slightly flare in reaction.

“Is this what you meant?”

A groan escaped his throat. She had no idea if that was an answer, but he clearly liked what she had done.

There was a hard thump as everything he wore below the waist hit the floor. It was barely a tick before his hands were on her, gripping her backside as he slid her against his skin and nearly off the edge of the table.

Lotor felt hot against her, flesh on flesh, and he was so very stiff as he pressed himself between her legs. Allura leaned up into him, and wanted to giggle at the thought of how worked up he had gotten himself while using his mouth to make it clear to her that he valued _her_ needs. Instead, she wrapped her arms around him and kissed at his neck. She could feel him swallow against her lips, and it sent a thrill through her.

“I’m yours, Lotor,” she murmured against his skin. “Everything I am is now yours.”

She could feel his breath against her ear, but he didn’t say anything. One of his hands started to move up her waist and side, tugging at the fabric bunching around her upper arm.

“Are you?” he asked, low and gravely.

“In less than a movement, it will be official.” She absolutely was playing to his current desire for dominance.

He hummed in response, as his hands switched places and he was pulling down the other side of her gown, popping her breasts free of the fabric.

“With me comes the secrets of Oriande…,” she whispered as she touched his ear with her tongue. Allura hoped that hadn’t been the wrong thing to say. His failure at the test would have been a sore spot for him, but she did want to encourage him to open up about it. The only reason he had failed was he had favored his upbringing in a war-like culture, none of his Altean blood. Of course that hadn’t worked for the test, it was not there for the Galra. She wondered if he had realized-

“That it does,” he whispered as he ran a finger down across her skin before he began to fondle a breast.

“Perhaps, someday we might return. And even if we did not, our children will need to go….”

He let out a breath against her ear. “Yes, but first…,” he said softly, and he moved back slightly.

She held onto him, one hand now clasping his strong shoulder. He started to press his member against her, and without much encouragement, slipped inside. Pulling her closer again, he leaned his head to the side, and kissed across her cheek to her mouth as he slowly pushed himself fully in. They looked at one another for a moment, before he closed his eyes as he pressed his lips to hers.

When their tongues touched, he pulled himself out of her and began to thrust back in. Even after a climax, she was becoming worked up again. Their kisses became frantic, the sensuality of it tickling them both in the most base of ways.

He was plunging into her harder now, not needing much more encouragement. The feeling was making Allura feel woozy. Wrapping her legs around him, their kisses barely even connected anymore. Lotor pulled her body flush against him, her bare breasts pressing and sliding against his armor at every forceful push from him. The friction against her sensitive skin sent sparks down her body.

Their lips were barely grazing one another’s as he dug his fingers into her lower back, grunting against her lips as she felt him come inside her. His thrusting went from forceful, to slow, before ceasing completely. Lotor leaned his forehead onto her shoulder as he moved a hand down. His fingers went between her legs, and he brought her quickly to another climax. This time neither moved, and they stayed like that for a few dobashes as they both tried to catch their breath.

She started to wonder what he was thinking, if anything at all, when he began to pepper her neck and collarbone with kisses. She whispered his name, and he made a noise in response, but didn’t stop.

“I… would like to bask in the afterglow with you, but I am concerned about how this room is to be used quite soon.”

He laughed and pulled back to look at her, before placing a kiss on her lips.

“I understand, My Empress.”

 

–

 

Keith followed Shiro into the conference room. He could feel his heart hammering in his chest. Visions of being thrown into a Galra prison or that coliseum that his mentor had endured as _The Champion_ were flooding his thoughts. He nearly tripped over his own feet when Shiro stopped walking and turned to him.

Giving Keith a small smile, Shiro gestured to the seat next to his. Keith glanced around the room. Everyone was still standing. He locked eyes with his mother, talking to Kolivan, and kept her gaze as she excused herself and moved towards him. He tried to remember to breath as she came over and squeezed his arm.

“Keith… it will be fine.”

“I….”

“She’s right, Keith,” Shiro started. “This isn’t a tribunal.”

“It should be, though, shouldn’t it….” he said as he looked to the floor.

He’d made mistakes in the past, he knew he had. Leaving the Garrison didn’t compare to this. He was able to just leave. The things they’d done in Voltron under his command were far bigger than one military, one country, or one planet. Many throughout history had suffered dire consequences for lesser crimes than his. By all rights he should be executed for some form of treason and crimes against… humanoids.

A lump started forming in his throat as Krolia put her arm around his shoulders and pulled him into a hug. The little chatter that had been going on around the room ceased, and he could feel all eyes on them. His desire to scramble out of the room and flee went into overdrive. If she hadn’t been holding him, he would have ran like a coward.

Krolia pulled back and smiled at him as she held him by his arms. Keith could feel his eyes prickling, and he willed himself to not react to anything.

“All will be well, I promise you,” she whispered so low only he and Shiro heard.

Keith looked away, and couldn’t help but notice that everyone really was looking at them. He scanned across the few Blade leaders, several high ranking Galra standing next to Acxa and Dayak, and a few other important Coalition leaders. His eyes landed on Allura and Lotor. They were standing closer to one another than he would have expected or had seen before; a clear sign of some sort of shared intimacy even to his unsociable skills. He was suddenly terrified of Allura and her loyalties.

Lotor kept his gaze as he took in a deep breath and let it out. The emperor turned to Allura, and put his hand on her elbow to lead her closer to the large table. Keith had expected them to sit, but they did not. He tried to remember protocol in this situation, should he bow? Wait to be told to sit down? What did they need to do?

His questions were answered as the rest of the group sat down, and Keith absentmindedly followed. He was slightly alarmed by Krolia and Shiro sitting to other side of him. Something bad was about to happen, he just knew it.

Lotor put his hands behind his back, a clear sign of power and his position. Keith tried to ignore the slight shake in his own hands as the emperor began speaking.

“Thank you all for coming. I have combined the two urgent meetings needed into a single meeting, as the information pertains to all parties. Kolivan,” he said and turned to the Blade leader.

Kolivan stood and gave a report on Sendak’s current movements and assumed whereabouts.

“...and we’ll need Voltron or Sincline to handle this, perhaps both, depending on what you wish, Your Imperial Majesty. The Fire of Purification will be focusing on the Brisig System a few days after the royal wedding concludes, and it’s best to let them think we’re more distracted with celebrations than we are. It’s faster and more covert to transport the mechas than an entire fleet. Moving Sincline where we need it through the space between realities gives us the element of surprise in every single possible tactic. I propose the combined forces of both machines and the infiltration we’ve already began to work in tandem to combat whatever they’re planning, and for our own future attacks.”

Lotor nodded. “Thank you. We’ll need to keep an eye on them to see if anything changes. If it all continues, we will solidify battle plans and act accordingly.” He paused, and glanced at Keith. The paladin’s stomach flipped and he realized he was vice gripping the chair.

“Our next major speaking point is the unfortunate situation involving myself and Voltron. All parties who were not directly involved have been sent a briefing that you would have read by now.”

He didn’t think it was possible, but Lotor managed to stand up straighter, his body stiff. Allura next to him was staring down at the table, breathing very visibly and slowly. Her hands were clasped tightly in front of her.

“Paladin Keith, please stand.”

Keith felt the blood drain from his face.

His body felt like lead, and he couldn’t move. He was vaguely aware of Shiro touching his arm, but he had tunnel vision on the two royals. Allura took in a deep breath, and gave him a gentle smile.

“Keith,” she began to say, and he was instantly hyper aware of how ridiculous this situation was. He was a human from Earth, and aside from Shiro, the only human in a room full of what would be considered aliens. He felt out of place, completely foreign. And his life was in their hands.

“Keith. Please stand, my paladin of Voltron.”

He swallowed hard, and on shaking hands, somehow managed to push himself up from the chair to stand and angled towards them at the head of the table. All eyes moved to look at him.

“I would like a detailed description of the situation from the point of view of the Commander of Voltron,” Lotor said coldly.

Keith tried to breathe steady. He hadn’t been prepared for this, not really. Nothing could have prepared him for this.

“A-as you wish, Emperor Lotor,” he managed to get out. “There… we….” he sighed and closed his eyes briefly as he decided to just be as honest as possible. “I did a piss poor job of reconnaissance, shaming the Blades with my carelessness. I relied on the word of one civilian and an all too brief location sweep. This lead to incomplete and hastily gathered information that then influenced _my_ commander, Princess Allura, to make an equally careless decision to attack you, Lot- Your Imperial Majesty. Th-then when we, uh, when you returned later, I let go of my principles in what I knew wasn’t right. Allu-Princess Allura insisted we attack you, and I… I know that regardless of rank of those within the Lions, during combat Voltron is my responsibility. I knew what we were doing was wrong. To attack an ally attempting to speak peacefully is unacceptable. I did not take command of the situation as I should have done. My mistake and indecision cost us your trust, and very nearly cost us far more. I’m aware we are only here speaking because of Princess Allura’s alchemy.” He paused to take a deep breath. “I… I apologize for my poor decisions. I don’t deserve forgiveness, but I hope to someday make amends for what I’ve done, if you will allow it, Your Imperial Highness.”

Keith put his fist across his chest and did his best to mimic that bow he saw the Galra always doing. He stayed bent, the silence terrifying. Nobody had told him to do this, but he felt that it was necessary. Voltron would belong to the Galra throne now, and he was himself half Galran, anyway.

The silence felt like it stretched forever. And then it was broken by the clear gait of Lotor as he walked around the table towards him. A terrifying vision of the emperor taking out his sword and running him through crossed his mind. When Lotor’s hand touched his shoulder, Keith nearly jumped out of his skin.

“Stand.”

Keith righted himself. He met Lotor’s gaze, and the emperor’s eyes were pinched, seemingly searching for something from him. He had to hold himself back from jumping when Lotor removed his hand and crossed his arms in front of himself.

“Tell me, Paladin Keith, what were you hoping to accomplish in the quintessence field after Voltron followed me in?”

His mind was swimming and he had to look away. Keith couldn’t remember much anymore, there was yelling, so much yelling. He could remember Allura screaming into the com at one point. Maybe about the quintessence. Lotor responded back at them in the same manner. Keith couldn’t be sure of the truth until after, but he had been convinced the emperor had completely snapped, and maybe the man they had known was gone to the quintessence.

“I… I thought that you were… maybe like the, uh, previous emperor, at that point. We all did. It was in the middle of the battle and I suppose we were all reacting before we were thinking. I know that you were trying to talk to us, previously....”

Keith couldn’t help but glance at Allura. Her brows were pinched and she was worried, but she definitely had a sorrowful air about her. He looked back to Lotor, and nearly started to shake in fear. The emperor was glaring down at him.

“Kolivan. What would you say of Keith’s command in the situation, based on the training he has been provided by the Blade of Marmora?” Lotor asked as he turned away from him.

Keith watched, petrified, as Kolivan stood to answer.

“If he believed you to be compromised in the same way as Emperor Zarkon, on the heels of Princess Allura’s insistence of your betrayal and the evidence found in the laboratory near the new Altean planet did point in that general direction, then I find his reaction to be satisfactory. His duty was to protect the Princess and Voltron in that moment. I do question his lack of care of long term consequences for the act, however.”

“Is that all?”

He prayed it would be. It was not.

“Keith has a tendency to react before thinking, rushing into situations without any plans for the outcome. This can be good in combat situations, or at times like during the Kral Zera ceremony. It is not ideal for a commander.”

His mouth went dry. He’d been making too many mistakes.

Lotor turned back to him, and his eyes narrowed even more as he looked at Keith.

“From what I understand of the Lions. I cannot help but wonder why you are not still piloting the Red one.”

Keith had been asking himself the same question for a long time now.

“I… I don’t know. It’s… Shiro suggested I be prepared in case we needed it, and then he was gone. I never chose it. I… I’m fully aware of my weaknesses,” Keith said as he looked to the ground again.

“I approve of this _weakness_ of protecting Princess Allura,” Lotor said in almost a whisper. Keith’s eyes shot up to his. “Your loyalty to her command is admirable. However, as the leader of Voltron, you needed to voice your concerns in a stronger way, so as to not only make sure your voice was heard, but that the urgency of needing to not react with violence before thinking was made clear. As someone not long in this conflict or with Voltron, it is understandable that your confidence of the situation would be lacking. A trusted commander must make his concerns known, as no leader is infallible.”

Keith no longer had any idea what was going on. Was he to be punished, or were they praising him? He flinched again, as Lotor unfolded his arms, and moved one back to Keith’s shoulder.

“I forgive you,” Lotor said low before removing his hand as he stalked back to the front of the table without waiting for a response. Keith merely gaped after him like a fish.

“You may sit.”

Lotor said it so casually that Keith barely registered it as he slowly returned to his seat. Immediately Shiro put a hand on his shoulder and whispered to him.

“You did great, Keith.”

He mumbled a thanks, and then Krolia’s hand went over his on the armrest. Looking up at her, she gave him a gentle smile. He had no idea what to feel.

A holoscreen appeared around the table. Schematics of Voltron, alongside the individual Lions all slightly spinning popped up into view.

“As you all can see, Voltron is a powerful weapon. While Sincline makes up for some aspects in raw power, there are other things that the Lions are capable of that Sincline is not. Five corresponding powers synchronized allows for variation in weapons and uses to more suit individual circumstances. Along with Princess Allura’s ability to meld with Voltron, there is a more utilitarian and personable aspect that Sincline lacks. As such, we will be using them both, occasionally together.”

Lotor leaned against the table, his expression turning grim.

“In the past, Voltron has not been working to the strengths of either the Lions, or the paladins piloting them.”

Several pictures and names of their locations appeared over the schematics, each highlighting a situation where they had barely made it out alive… and many where those they were working with did not.

“Voltron has been sloppy. There have been multiple situations in which the paladins have unnecessarily and erroneously vacated their Lions in an attempt at espionage or other non-Voltron related operations, causing complications. While it is true both defense and offense are equally important in an ongoing conflict, spreading oneself too thin to try is folly.”

He paused, and the screen changed back to the schematics.

“As members of a large coalition, there is absolutely no reason for the Voltron paladins to vacate their cockpits for hand-to-hand combat, putting at risk not only their own lives and specialized skills, but the security of the Lions themselves. Therefore moving forward, every instance of combat or covert mission will include one Blade of Marmora member within each of the Lions. Any situation that requires personal actions outside of a Lion will be undertaken by said Blade operative. The paladins are not to leave their Lions under any circumstances save the most dire.”

Lotor stopped speaking, clearly letting the room process his announcement. That bad feeling was still in the pit of Keith’s stomach.

A few questions were asked, but he didn’t listen to them or the answers. They’d give him minutes of the meeting anyway, and he needed to try and calm down. Being so distracted, he hadn’t noticed he was being spoken to once more until Krolia squeezed his wrist.

Looking up, Keith was on edge seeing that everyone was looking at him again. Allura spoke.

“Keith, you’ve expressed an interest in spending more time on missions with the Blades of Marmora, correct?”

“...yes?”

“Is that what you wish?” Her voice was soft and tinged with hurt.

“I… I think I’ve proven that I need…,” he looked down into his lap, his voice going quieter. “That is, I probably need more training, especially if I am to be a leader. I just…,” he glanced up, looked to Shiro, and then back to Allura. “I’m not ready to be a commander.”

He had said that to them countless times, but to announce it in front of the Coalition leadership was embarrassing and made him feel pathetic.

“Paladin Shiro,” Lotor began, “I would like your input. You have first hand knowledge on Keith’s abilities and training.”

Shiro shifted in his seat. “Well, Keith has always been an excellent pilot, one of the best I’ve ever seen, even from within the Galra.” Keith’s eyes shot up to look at him. “He shows a great aptitude for the sword and close quarters combat. His training has improved that skill tremendously, as Kolivan can vouch. As to his leadership skills, he needs more confidence in his thoughts and feelings, but that usually comes from experience. Rome wasn’t built in a day.”

The confused looks made Shiro blush.

“Ahh, I apologize, that idiom would be lost on most of you. I just mean it will take more time. There has been a magnitude of information for us Earthlings to take in and process, and Keith has had even more than the rest. With his enthusiasm for it, I believe more training with Krolia and the Blades would be beneficial to Keith and by extension, Team Voltron.”

“And of the piloting of Black Lion?” Lotor asked, and Keith tried to remember to breathe. He _knew_ there would be something bad. He could not possibly do both, it had already caused so many problems.

Shiro’s hand touched his arm.

“Keith… have you gone into Black Lion since the battle with the Emperor?”

His stomach dropped. He had not.

“N-no.”

“I have.” Shiro gave him a sorrowful look. “I’m sorry Keith, but she made up her own mind.”

Keith felt like he had been sucker punched in the stomach.

“I...I don’t have a Lion?”

“Do you want one?” Shiro said softly, and gently squeezed his hand.

He looked back down at the table in front of him. After everything that had gone on, Red wasn’t responding to him anymore. Lance couldn’t even return to Blue if he had wanted to. Too much had changed. He had been ousted from being a paladin by Voltron itself and he hadn’t even known.

“I… don’t know,” he said softly, probably too soft for most of those at the end of the table to hear.

Shiro stood up suddenly.

“Emperor, I believe Black Lion is still bonded with me. I would like us to run some tests, but my theory is that the Lion responded to Keith through both his desire to pilot a Lion, and my being within the Lion itself. We possibly have a situation where this decision isn’t even ours to make. If that is the case, we should decide what course we are taking if I am to resume commanding Voltron.”

Keith’s hands were shaking again. He felt like refuse being thrown into the gutter.

“I understand,” Lotor started. “Assuming this is the direction of the Team, then I wish to start making suggestions for placements of the Blades to work with you. It would be beneficial to all for Keith to be part of the team working closely with Voltron, as he is now in the unique situation of being experienced with both. While being in Black Lion with you would be ideal, I want Keith somewhere else.”

He realized they had been talking about him as if he wasn’t even in the room for a good chunk of the meeting. And now they were making his choices for him. This had been half the problem he’d had with the Garrison.

There was silence again, and Keith glanced up. When he met eyes with Lotor, the emperor spoke again. He’d clearly been waiting for his reaction.

“Keith, I would like you to be the Blade member with Paladin Lance in Red Lion.”

“...what?”

Allura smiled and was the one to continue. “We believe, and I am including Shiro in this, that both of you would blossom in this situation. I have seen firsthand how well you work together when you try. With a specific goal in mind, I even wonder if you might be good friends...?”

There was a mischievousness glint to her eyes, and he was concerned.

“I was hoping perhaps you could also… rein him in a bit? We could consider this a test for your leadership skills. I have faith that you can accomplish this task, Keith.”

He wasn’t sure if he was more annoyed at the thought of dealing with Lance’s mouth running constantly to complain, or that Allura was clearly manipulating him into it. He sighed.

“If that is my order.”

“It is,” Lotor stated flatly. “After the meeting concludes, I want you to go withn Shiro to determine if our hypothesis of the current Lion situation is correct. If there is another outcome, we’ll discuss that later.”

Someone said something, but Keith wasn’t listening. He only heard Shiro’s reaction as he begin to proclaim he didn’t feel he needed a new tech arm, but if he was going to be a paladin in a Lion, he agreed there was a real need.

Shiro had sat down at some point, and the conversation continued, but Keith didn’t notice. He was sure they discussed important things, but his mind was reeling; Shiro was going to be the paladin in Black again, but now he didn’t belong… not really. Lance was sure to lord this over him.


End file.
